Payson the Guardian
by MeElla
Summary: At the age of 23, Payson is left to take care of her younger sister. Giving up her LA-life she moves back to Boulder. When Becca wants to pursuit gymnastics, Payson finds her place in the parents viewing area. But is it her place? Will be Payson/Sasha.
1. Chapter 1

A/N 1: So in this universe, Becca was 10 years old when Payson competed in London 2012.

Not really knowing where you are in life isn't the same thing as getting your feet knocked away from under you. Payson learned the hard way. Studying at university in California might not have been Payson's dream, but it felt okay, great even, some of the time. Until the day Becca called, crying in hysterics. It was a Wednesday morning and Payson will never forget the day that changed their life forever.

The alarm woke Payson up at six am. She still wasn't used to it. Her old room in her parents house looked like it did when she had lived there last, five years ago. Except the boxes that contained her boxed up LA-life. After getting dressed she left the dark room, she tried not to spent too much in there. The door to her parents old room was closed. It was finally empty, but they still kept the door close, pretending it didn't exist. They never talked about it.

Payson knocked on her sister's door. "Becca? You awake?" She didn't wait for an answer, it usually took at least an hour before Becca was out of bed. So instead she went into the kitchen and started the coffee maker. She jumped up and sat on the counter as she waited.

The kitchen looked exactly like her parents had left it. They would have to do something about it... Payson hadn't talked with Becca, but she was meeting with a realtor later that day. They hadn't decided what to do about the house, but it was expensive, and even if Payson had money, it felt wrong to live there without their parents. It was like they were stuck in time capsule.

"Becca! 6.30!" she poured herself a cup of coffee. Neither of them were breakfast people, so Payson didn't bother making any. She got her iPad from the living room table where it had been charging during the night. She had five new messages from school. Questions and more questions about when she was coming back. If she hadn't been who she was, she would have lost her spot in the program the moment she moved back to Colerado. Which was over a month by now.

"Becca! 7 am!"

"I'm up!" Becca shouted back.

There were few similarities between the two sisters these days. Payson still only took five minutes to get ready in the morning. She had a pair of old jeans and a sweatshirt on and her hair up in a bun. The high school student Becca was, took almost forty minutes in the bathroom before she was ready to go. Payson had time to answer four out of the five emails before Becca made her way down the stairs.

"Morning," Payson said, filling up an other cup with coffee and handing it to her sister. It probably wasn't healthy to drink coffee at 14, but there were probably bigger fights waiting. Payson had seen enough movies to know situations like theirs never ended well.

"Thanks," Becca said, hesitating slightly. "I was thinking..."

Payson looked up from her iPad. Her sister looked... Almost nervous. She put away the iPad. "What's up Becca?"

"Well, I was thinking maybe I should go back to training?" Becca said.

"Oh, of course," Payson said. She hadn't even thought about it. Becca had never been as serious or focused on gymnastics as Payson was when she was younger. Payson hadn't even thought about Becca's training. "I'll pick you up after school and drive you," she said.

"Is that okay?" Becca asked.

"Of course Becca," Payson said, feeling like crying. "Why don't we go to Spruse Juice after practice?" she added, trying to make her sister smile again.

"I could pack my bag and leave it in your car?"

Payson nodded. "You better hurry, we need to leave if you want to be on time."

Becca hurried up the stairs and Payson gathered up her things and put them in her purse. They were running late, as usual. How had her mother dealt with all this?

After dropping Becca off at school she continued driving to Denver. Kelly had promised her the use of one of her offices, the Internet in her parents house wasn't good enough for an online meeting with her professors in LA. She was pretty sure she knew what this meeting was about. The best case scenario? They would make her take a leave of absence. But they were probably forcing her to quit the program. She was done with the first four years, but had just started the second four a year ago. If she ever got the opportunity to go back, she would have to start the application process all over again... Quitting now probably made it impossible for Payson to finish her degree.

"Hi, I'm Payson Keeler. Is Kelly Parker here?" she asked the woman in the reception desk of Kelly Parker Enterprise Denver.

"She had to go to a meeting in New York, but she left instructions for you to borrow a office. We've set it up. This way miss."

Payson followed the woman who couldn't be many years older than her. They walked past a break room where the woman gave her a cup of coffee. Kelly had gone crazy with the office Payson was borrowing, of course. It had a sign on the door that said _Payson Keeler, Olympic gold medalist and star student._ Payson just shook her head but thanked the woman and walked inside. The office was on the fifth floor and had an amazing view of Denver. On the desk, next to the computer's keyboard, she found a note from Kelly.

_Payson. Had to head back to New York, sorry. Use the office for as long as you want. You could keep it you know. Talk to you later. _

She had to smile. Kelly had wanted her to come work for her forever. Payson had kept telling her no though, she had no intention to go into business. Even if KPE now was more into charity than making money, it just wasn't for her.

The Keeler sisters drove in silence toward The Rock. Payson hadn't put her foot in there since the party after the Olympics. As she parked the car a bit away from the designated spot for the Keelers she felt like throwing up. Their mother had been the gym manager at The Rock since Payson was 16, silently she wondered if they had found somebody else already. She turned the car off and turned to her sister.

"You ready Beccs?" she asked, putting as much of a smile as she could on her lips.

"You don't need to come with me," Becca said.

"It's okay," Payson said, almost more to herself than her sister. "I need to see the coach." Or something. She probably had to do something, being the guardian of her sister. Every time the thought crossed her mind she felt like passing out. A little over a month ago Payson had been out partying with friends the whole night before acing a test.

They both got out of the car, the parking lot was already full, they were a bit late, having driven there in snail pace . "Okay, let's go sis," Payson said, taking her sisters hand in hers when she noticed the intimidation on her sisters face.

They walked inside together. All Payson wanted to do was to run away, but she had to stay strong for her sister. That was her job now. Her full time job, it turned out. As they walked through the doors it was like traveling back in time. It was almost suffocating. She had to stop in the lobby to take a few deep breaths, trying to stabilize the world around her.

"Are you okay?" Payson looked down at her sister, who looked as she felt.

Becca nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine."

The gym was in full swing, there were girls and boys everywhere. Payson couldn't recognize any of them, except of two of Becca's friends. These girls and boys were two generations younger than her. She had known several of the people on the Olympic team that went to Rio last year. These girls and boys were working toward the 2020 Olympics, or even later. It made her feel old.

"Becca!" several of the girls squealed and came running. Payson looked around the gym, like everything else it looked like it always had. She couldn't believe she had forgotten to ask Becca what the new coach was named. The thirty-something woman she saw coming walking toward them was the third coach after Sasha, apparently she had started a year ago, after the Olympics. She couldn't believe how she didn't know the name of her sisters coach. How much of a bad sister was she?

"Hi Becca," the woman said, hugging Becca. "I'm so sorry for your loss."

Becca mumbled a thanks before following her friends out on the floor.

"You must be Becca's coach," Payson smiled holding out her hand. "I'm her sister, Payson."

"Yes, Maria Jonson," they shook hands. "I'm sorry about your loss. How's everything going?"

Payson didn't know how to answer that. "Okay," she said, wanting to change the subject as fast as she could. "Is it okay for Becca to just come back?" she asked.

"Of course," Coach Jonson said. "Before... Well, we were walking about Becca moving up to elite..."

"Oh, elite... Already?"

"She's 14, you know that's the age to either go for it or not. Nationals this year is the last year she's a junior. She's on the list of considerations for Junior worlds in five months."

"Wow," Payson said. This was all news to her. She felt like the worst sister in the world. "I'll talk to her. It would be a lot of changes for her..."

"And for you," Coach Jonson said. "You know how much times it takes for the family."

Payson nodded and thanked the coach. She had planned on going back home, or even to the mall, while her sister worked out. But she already felt like an idiot of a sister, so she took a deep breath and walked over to the parent viewing area. There were lots of gym-moms and gym-dads. She sat down in the back, not wanting to screw up the delicate balance and hierarchy. She remembered her mother telling her about their first day at the Rock. Kim had sat down at an empty spot in the front. The older, better, gymnasts' parents hadn't liked that at all. She smiled a little at the though of her mother telling the story, but a bang in her heart and almost choking feeling quickly made her change the direction of her thoughts.

Practice ended at seven and after driving by first spruce juice and a Greek restaurant they were home in the house, eating in the living room. There were so many things they should be talking about, Payson didn't even know where to start.

"What did you think of practice?" Becca asked, picking at her salad, pushing the food around. "I didn't think it went too bad, considering..."

Payson nodded and smiled. "I was very impressed Becca, you've gotten so much better since I saw you in LA only a few months ago."

"You think?" Becca looked hopeful. "Coach Jonson was talking about moving up to elite..."

"She told me," Payson said. It all felt so strange, having this talk with her younger sister. "What do you think about it? Do you want to go elite?" She didn't know what she hoped her sister would say.

Becca shrugged. "Me and mom was talking about it..."

Payson nodded, it felt like it was all she did, nodding and smiling. "Do you want to stay here to do it or are you interested in any other gyms?" She had really tried not to compare coach Jonson to every coach she'd ever had, but she couldn't help herself. She just wasn't sure Jonson was a good enough coach.

"What do you mean?"

"I met with a realtor this afternoon..." Payson started explaining about her meeting with mrs Forch.

Once upon a time, not really that long ago, Becca was very opinionated. Payson remembered the move to Boulder. Becca had been six when they moved and she had been the hardest to convince. She had refused moving away from their cousins and grandparents. Becca had also always been a social butterfly and just two days after starting school in Boulder she had made tons of new friends. She had never been as against change as Payson had been when she was younger, but she had always known what she wanted and wasn't afraid to voice it. Which was why Payson expected Becca to have a very strong opinion on the matter of selling or keeping the house, on moving or staying. Instead Becca shrugged.

"What do you think?" Becca asked, twisting her hands in her lap.

"What's wrong Becca?" Payson asked.

"Nothing," Becca said. "I just think you can decide, you're the one who's stuck with me..."

It felt like someone had reached into Payson's chest and was trying to squeeze Payson's heart into nothing. It made sense now. She felt tears push their ways into her eyes. "Becca," she said, taking her sisters hands into her owns. "I'm not stuck with you. Both grandma, aunt Rachel and uncle Joe offered to help us out and let you stay with them. I told them we can do it on our own. I don't want it any other way. I hope you don't either, but if you do we can arrange it... I just... I think we should be together. Don't you?" she had managed to fight her tears, but as she saw her sister nodding with tears running down her cheeks she couldn't keep them back any more. She pulled her sister into a hug.

Watching Becca walking upstairs to head to bed Payson made herself a promise. It wasn't Becca's fault they were in this situation. Payson had 23 years with her parents, Becca had 14. Knowing fully well she could never make up for it, Payson promised herself that Becca wouldn't miss out on any of her dreams because she suddenly was the little orphan girl.

All this because of one drunk driver. Payson focused on the anger she felt. Anger was better than sadness, she couldn't be sad any more, there simply weren't any energy for it. She cradled her head, trying to gain control over her disorganized thoughts.

She could do this, she could do this...

However many times she repeated the mantra, she couldn't bring herself to believe it. How could she ever be any kind of substitute for their parents?


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you so much for the review, story alerts and favorite addings. I hadn't planned on posting this soon again, but you all made me so happy so I thought I should return the favor and post a short chapter. I wont be this quick to update in the future. Will try to have an other chapter up this weekend.

.:.

The more Payson watched her sister doing gymnastics, the more depressed it made her feel. It wasn't jealousy this time, not like when she hurt her back and had to sit on the sidelines. This time she had walked away from gymnastics on her own terms, she was done with the sport. What bugged her, if you can even call it that, was knowing that the certainty she had felt at Becca's age, knowing that she was doing what she was supposed to do, hadn't returned since she stopped training.

She had known that quitting gymnastics was what she was the right thing to do, she got her medals and she didn't want to destroy her body completely. But the steps after that? Going to college in LA? Getting started on a degree in physical therapy? It was all just on a whim. How was she supposed to know what to do with the rest of her life?

"So what do you think of coach Jonson?" a man next to her leaned in and whispered. "She's considered as head coach at the Training Center in Colorado Springs. Or that's the rumor anyway."

"I don't really know her," Payson said. A week in the parents viewing area wasn't enough for her to form an opinion. Not a fair one at least.

"I'm Derek, Sophia's dad," he said, pointing out a girl behind Becca in the warm up line. Payson thought she recognized the girl as one of Becca's old friends.

"I'm Payson, Becca's sister."

"I know who you are," he smiled, a little too big.

"I should go back to studying," she lied and motioned down to the iPad in her lap. What she really was doing, was to look up all the best gym's around the country. They hadn't decided if they were going to move out of town or not, but they were going to sell the house. If they decided to stay they would get an apartment.

"Oh, it's the Elimination Game," one of the women in the front row said.

Payson looked up and saw all the girls gathered around Coach Jonson next to the uneven bars. "What's the elimination game?" she asked.

"It's what Theresa calls it," Derek said with a smile. "It's more of a fitness test. Coach Jonson uses it to rank the girls."

Memories of TC and the ranking board coming back. She studied her sister. Becca hadn't been as competitive as Payson growing up, but after a few days in the parents viewing area she had realized that Becca probably was a lot more like Payson herself than she had originally thought. Now her blond, thin sister looked determent but nervous. She wanted to go out there and tell her sister that she shouldn't over do anything. A month away from practice isn't just forgotten after five days of training. But instead of going out there she remained in her seat, Payson realized how angry she would have gotten if anyone came out on the floor when she had been practicing. And it's the coach job, to make sure the gymnasts don't overdo it. She would have to trust coach Jonson...

Payson watched the Elimination Game with a growing uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach. Becca, like the other girls, were giving it her all. They did pushups until their arms were shaking, situps hanging from the bars, pull ups from the bars, and lots of other strengthening tests from both the beam and on the floor. One of the girls actually threw up and then went back to the test.

It was all okay exercises, Payson had done them all many times herself. It was the way coach Jonson handled the Elimination Game that made her feel unsure of it. After every part she made sure everyone knew who was best and who was worse. The one finishing last always had to do an other round of what they were doing.

This game, as the parents called it, helped forming Payson's opinion quite quickly. Unfortunately it was moving towards dislike. And if Payson wasn't sure yet, she certainty was after coach Jonson first made fun of Becca for losing her grip on the beam and then stopped her from go drink water. Payson had many though coaches in her life, but none of them had stopped her from drinking water. She rose and walked to the glass dividing the viewing area from the gym.

"You really don't want to go out there," Derek said behind her.

"I'm pretty sure I do," Payson mumbled, more to herself than the parents around her.

"Coach Jonson doesn't want parents on the floor. And I'm sure the rule applies to sisters as well." He laughed as if it had been a joke.

Payson took a deep breath and nodded. She got the same vibes from Coach Jonson that she had once gotten from a certain Ms Ellen Beals. She has pushed them away earlier, but this brought it all back. She leaned against the wall and closed her eyes. What would their mother have done? What would their mother have done?

As the test moved on, Payson watched the girls get more and more tired. Behind her the mothers and one father laughed about how the girls was more tires after this test than after any other training sessions.

Payson remained standing, or pacing more like it, by the window. She got her phone out and wrote a text to Kelly. _If I think a coach goes to far with a "elimination test" do I step in?_ she sent it and continued pacing. The answer came no more than a minute later. _If Becca's in danger, of course. If not, think about what you would have wanted. Call me later._

The question was: was Beccain danger. Probably not. For the first time in her life, Payson understood her mother. It wasn't easy standing behind the glass, watching, not being able to do anything.

.:.

Becca was exhausted as they walked out to the car when practice ended. They drove in silence. Payson stopped by Spruise Juice and bought her sister a fruit smoothie before driving home.

"Are you okay?" Payson asked her sister as they walked to the house.

"Just tired," Becca said. "Elimination is always brutal..."

"Do you like coach Jonson?" Payson said, holding the door open for her sister. The dark and empty house almost echoed as they walked inside. Even if Payson kept turning the heat up, she got cold as soon as she stepped inside.

"She's okay," Becca said. "Why?" Becca sat down by the kitchen counter while Payson started looking through the fridge. It was quite empty so she quickly gave up.

"There's a lot of great gyms out there if you're interested. I've talked with Greg Walters, the junior national team coach, he was very interested in you coming to Houston."

"Do you want to move to Houston?" Becca asked.

Payson wanted to laugh God no, but she didn't. "What I'm saying is that when i wanted to do gymnastics for real, mom and dad picked up and moved us all, for me. I want you to know I'll do the same for you. If you want to stay here, we do that. If you want to move somewhere else, we do that."

"But what if I don't win any Olympic Medals?"

"This is not about medals, Becca. Do you remember questioning mom if we only did gymnastics because we were good at it? Remember how she said we do it because we love it? I don't care if you medal or not. If you do gymnastics or not, as log as you do what you love."

She wondered how long this uncertain part would last. How long they would be tiptoeing around each other. And what would come after it?

"What if I can't decide yet?"

"Then we wait and see."

Becca nodded and bit her lip. Truth to be told Payson wasn't sure what she wished Becca would do. But she meant every word, Becca would make the decision and Payson would follow her sister's dream.

They ended up ordering thi-food and after eating Becca disappeared up to her room. The coldness seemed to creep closer as she was left alone in the living room. Payson was glad, or maybe not glad, but felt relived that they were selling the house. She couldn't see herself and Becca living there much longer. She didn't think her sister wanted it either.

A vibration from her pocket woke Payson from her thoughts, she took out her phone and answered with a smile as she saw Kelly's face blinking on the display.

"What was that text about?" Kelly asked before even saying hello.

"Hi to you too Kelly," Payson said, rolling her eyes with a smile. "I'm fine thank you very much, how are you?" She took a blanket from the chair next to her and wrapped it around herself.

"Fine my ass. How's Becca?"

Payson couldn't help feeling very appreciable of her friend, it almost made her cry. "She's fine," Payson said. "Or you know... They had the Elimination Game at practice today. It was a test in Ellen Beals liking."

"That name still gives me shills." Kelly said.

"So how are you and Austin?" Payson asked, pulling the blanket tighter as she leaned back. She was living vicarious through her friends now.

"We're fine, in the actual sense of the word. He says hi."

Payson smiled, she missed her friends. She was about to tell the brunet, but stopped herself. Not wanting to burden her friend, she listened to the new story about Austin trying a new occupation. Those stories always had hilarious endings. And she could need a laugh, and a distraction from the question that had been gnawing her mind the whole day. What would she do about the coach situation? What could she do?

.:.

A/N 2: Sasha will show up, I promise. It'll take an other couple of episodes, I think. It's already written but it depends on how I divide the chapters.

A/N 3: As you might have understood, I don't know anything about gymnastics and I've only been to America once, so forgive me my mistakes. English isn't my first language and after learning British English in school, watching American tv-shows for years and one year living in Australia I do mix my accents rather badly sometimes. I hope it doesn't scare you off.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thank you all for the reviews, story alerts and favorite adds. It means the world to me.

A/N 2: And thanks to my new beta: Ilse'sPurpleSummer.

.:.

Without meaning to, during the coming week, Payson turned into a gym-sister. The more she actually studied coach Jonson, the more she disliked the woman. Maybe it wasn't fair to compare her to the coaches Payson had herself had, because she'd had some pretty amazing coaches, but there were some things she just couldn't see past. Like when coach Jonson loudly pointed out how somebody was the worst at something, or laughed at mistakes.

The woman was like a big bully sometimes. But she was also good at gymnastics, Payson could see it in the way she coached the girls. She just wasn't sure what she would do about the situation. Or what she could do. So she started with just talking with the parents around her in the viewing area.

"So, how long has Sophia trained here?" Payson asked Derek a couple of days after the elimination game. It was Friday morning and Payson would have given almost anything to be doing anything else than worrying for her little sister in the gym. But she sat there, and put a smile on her lips when Derek turned to her. He instantly returned the smile and turned his whole body toward her, moving slightly closer.

"Since she was 13, she came here when Mark Green was the coach."

Payson nodded and realized she had been wrong about Sophia being one of Becca's old friends, but that was beside the point. "What'd she think about switching to coach Jonson?" it was an innocent question.

"She seems happy," Derek said. "I would have liked to see coach Green stay, he was rather good with the kids, but he got a better offer from Denver."

"You don't like coach Jonson?" another innocent question, right?

"She wasn't the boards first choice... I think she's very good, especially with the oldest kids, but sometimes..." he shrugged, not continuing the sentence.

"Come on Derek!" Theresa, one of the women in the front row, said and turned around. "You know how much better Sophia has gotten in the last year!"

"And it's not like any other, better, coaches are on the market for new jobs anyway," the red-headed woman next to Theresa, Veronica, said.

Payson nodded. That was a good point. A very good and deciding point. She kind of wished Becca came home and said she wanted to move. It seemed like not much could be done about Coach Jonson at this point.

.:.

The weekend came around way faster than should be possible. The house would be showed by the realtor two days later, Monday afternoon. So instead of sitting in the gym watching Becca, Payson was home cleaning. It might be the most boring thing ever, to clean. A knock on the front door finally gave her an excuse to turn the vacuum cleaner off. Before she had a chance to open the door Kelly stepped inside.

"Are you always letting your guests stand outside the door for ten minutes before letting them in?" she asked, placing a bag by the door and shrugging out of a beautiful white coat.

"You waited for barely ten seconds," Payson enlightened her friend.

"Felt longer," Kelly said with a smile and a shrug. "How are you?" she asked and stepped closer so they could hug. Payson soaked up the human heat as she relaxed in her friends arms.

"I'm okay," she said. Maybe she wasn't good, or fine, but at least she was okay. That was quite an achievement compared to where she had been a month ago. "Come in. I was just cleaning for the showing on Monday. Do you want anything to eat or drink?"

That Kelly showed up without warning was no longer weird or unexpected. Kelly showed up where Kelly wanted, when Kelly wanted.

"Wouldn't say no to a cup of coffee," Kelly smiled.

After a quick cup of coffee they cleaned up both the kitchen, living room, the guest room and bathroom on the bottom floor enough to look good during the showing. The realtor had told Payson to put away most personal things, people apparently wanted to imagine their own things while shopping for a new house. Together they decided to take the top floor the following day. So one hour before Becca's practice would end they made their way over to The Rock.

"God, this is so weird," Kelly said, shaking her head. "I never thought I would see this place again." Kelly had spent the last six month before the Olympics training with the rebels at The Rock. "The drama we went through is enough to scar me for life."

"Most of the drama was your fault," Payson said with a smile. Even if Kelly didn't like to hear it, it was the truth.

"More Austin's, I would say," Kelly said, also smiling. "Come on, let's go inside."

"I never thought I would spend hour after hour in the gym again," Payson said, shaking her head. They locked arms and walked inside.

"Why do you spend all your time here? Becca is old enough to take care of herself," Kelly said.

Of course she was right, but it was just... "It's the coach," she said. "Can you just... study her with an open mind?"

Before Kelly could answer they walked through the doors and into the gym. The normally calm surroundings was nowhere to be seen. Coach Jonson was shouting, several of the girls looked like they had tears in their eyes. Payson felt a knot in her stomach at once. She more or less dragged Kelly after her into the parents viewing area. They were reading their books or magazines, worked on computers, chitchatted between each other.

"What's going on out there?" Payson asked nodding toward the girls out on the floor.

"They're doing strength and conditioning training," Theresa said after looking out at the girls. She then went back to the magazine. Payson looked between the woman and they young girls out on the floor.

"Some of them are crying," she said, not knowing what else to say. She looked at Kelly. They've had some grueling workouts in their days, sure, she had cried one time or an other out of sheer exhaustion, but never had she seen half a group crying at the same time. She looked between Kelly and her sister and was glad when Kelly grabbed her hand and led her to sit down.

"Nothing you do now will help Becca," she whispered, holding a steady grip around Payson's hand. Payson nodded. She knew Kelly was right, but that didn't stop her heart from clenching.

Both of them sat on the edge of their seats. It only took around fifteen minutes before Payson had enough. She watched her sister starting sobbing on the floor after coach Jonson said something to her. Getting up from her chair the parents around her looked up from their things.

"Payson, don't do it!" somebody said as Payson was about to walk out the door. At the shout out she turned around and looked at the parents.

"My little sister, and your children, are out there crying! This is not how you train gymnastics!" she said, voice loud. The anger was boiling inside her. "Becca!" she called out. Her sister came running over, taking Payson's hand. It was something Payson had never seen before and she instantly regretted not coming out earlier. She had been afraid Becca would be angry or embarrassed, but it was clear she was just relived.

"Miss Keeler, we have an other 45 minutes left of training," coach Jonson said harshly. Her glare was even worse.

"I'm sorry coach Jonson. Becca isn't feeling well, we need to leave now," she said, tightening the grip around her sisters hand as they walked toward the doors. Becca grabbed her things and together with Kelly they walked outside. Becca was crying harder as they came to the car.

"What's wrong Becca?" Payson asked, pulling her sister into a hug. "I'm sorry if you think I overreacted, but this is not okay!"

"I just wanted to get out of there," Becca whispered between sobs. "I'm just so tired."

"Why don't we get home and order some pizza?" Kelly said. "Put on a movie? Sit in the sofa all night?"

"Coach Jonson said we have to start thinking about what we're eating," Becca said. "Especially those of us who did poorly on the Fitness Test."

The anger was boiling inside Payson again, it felt like she would explode. "Becca, you're already eating healthy. You remember what happened to Kaylie when she went overboard?"

Becca nodded.

"Your body is perfect for gymnastics. You don't need to change a thing, don't let anyone make you believe anything else. You got me?"

Becca nodded again.

"So pizza?" Kelly asked. "I could kill for some pizza. Please tell me you guys want pizza!"

.:.

Sunday was a day off training, so after cleaning the rest of the house Payson and Kelly took Becca out on a shopping trip at the mall. For the first time in over a month, both Becca and Payson laughed so hard they got a stomachache. It almost felt like before.

Monday morning Payson woke Becca up as usual before school started. She had expected Becca not to want to go to practice, but she came down the stairs with her gym bag packed minutes before they had to leave.

"You pick me up after school and drive me to the Rock as usual?" she asked as Payson parked outside the school. Payson couldn't do anything else than nodding. She wanted to say no, but how could she?

She watched Becca walk into the high school Payson had attended for a few months herself. Payson had liked being home schooled. She liked school, but not attending school. Becca was the opposite.

As Payson was about to turn the car around she saw Becca's cellphone on the passenger seat, it must have slipped out of her sister's pocket. Before she had time to think too much she picked it up and checked the text messages. The last one was from a girl named Rachel, Payson thought she knew who the gymnast was. _Coach J said she'll kick u out and ban u frm ever competing again if you don't prove to her u want it. Head in the game grl! _

What was wrong with the woman? How could such a bully get a job as a head coach? The Rock might not be as good as it had been five years ago, but they still had one girl on the national team... Payson needed to get her sister out of that gym.

.:.

It was difficult to focus on the preparation for the house showing. She couldn't stand being inside as the people started arriving, so she pulled on a sweatshirt and took a cup of coffee and went out on the veranda. Hearing the people talking apart their house was heartbreaking. It might only have been her home for four years, but it was still home. She had spent time with her parents in it, happy times. Forcing the feelings away was difficult, but imagining herself boxing them up with all the pictures from around the house actually helped.

"Miss Keeler, we're done now," Mrs Forch popped her head out the veranda door.

Getting up from the chair she grimaced slightly, the back pain always got worse when she was cold. She got inside and put away the now empty cup.

"How did it seem?" Payson asked. "Anyone interested?"

"It's looking promising," Mrs. Forch said.

On the way to picking Becca up from practice she stopped by the coffee shop across the street from Spruse Juice. She had no idea when she had turned into a coffee addict, but it had happened somewhere between the Olympics and now. The first time she had even drunk coffee was the morning after the big party in the Olympic Village.

She paid the coffee and thanked the woman behind the counter before turning to leave. But after turning she didn't move. In the doorway a thin brunette had frozen in place. Kaylie looked very much like the last time Payson saw her, except she wasn't dressed in a leotard and was screaming and cursing. The walking away part was spot on though, as Kaylie turned around and walked away from the coffee shop without a word.

Payson gave it a couple of minutes before walking out to her car. She would be late to pick Becca up. She would have wanted to be in the gym today, but there had been no time...

.:.

Walking past Becca's room Payson heard soft sobs. She was on her way to go inside, but hesitated with her hand on the door knob. What had she to say? How could she comfort her sister? What could she say to make anything better? Payson couldn't breathe. Her heart was pounding a thousand beats a minute and the lump she had felt in her throat the last few weeks was on its way up. Her heart was aching, and she could no longer push her tears away. She hurried in to her own room and closed the door behind her. How was she supposed to handle everything? How was she supposed to live in a world where her parents didn't?

Tuesday morning was hell. Feeling like she was hungover Payson had to force herself out of bed. She took a quick shower before trying to wake Becca and then heading down to make coffee. With a little help of eye-drops and a bit of make up she looked like a human in time for Becca to enter the kitchen. Becca was dressed up for school as usual.

"You look nice," Payson said, forcing a smile on her lips. She could not continue breaking down like she had done the previous night. She would have to box up and pack away her feelings better.

"Thanks," Becca smile back and poured herself a cup of coffee. "Ready to go?"

Looking over at her sister with surprise she nodded. "Yeah, let's roll," she said. Since when did Becca want to leave so they'll actually be on time?

"How was your day?" Payson asked as Becca threw her school bag in the back of the car and sat down in the passenger seat.

"Okay."

"Are you okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, let's hurry, practice starts soon."

Payson felt like crying again. Something was so wrong. Well, everything was wrong. It wasn't hard to point it all out. But something more than the usual was wrong. But instead of dwelling on it she started the car again and drove toward the Rock.

Becca was out of the car almost before Payson had parked it. "You don't need to come in," Becca said, closing the door and literary running inside.

With a sigh Payson killed the engine and leaned back against the seat. She had no idea how to do this. How could she know how to do this? Her parents had been supposed to live much longer than to their mid 40s. Once again she had to fight tears. It took several minutes before she felt collected enough to walk inside. Feeling more than annoyed at herself.

"So what happened Saturday after we left?" Payson asked as she sat down in the back-row, nobody answered until she looked around and repeated the question.

"She was furious," Derek whispered without looking at her. "Sophia said she talked about everybody having to prove they wanted gymnastics. Apparently they didn't take gymnastics seriously enough. It's going to be a though workout today."

The information matched the text Payson had read on her sisters phone. She sighed and looked around the viewing are. Nobody looked at her. Nobody spoke with her either. It remained the same the rest of the day.

An hour into practice Payson saw that Derek was right. It was worse than the Elimination Game. The girls was dripping in sweat and several of them had been forced to sit down not to pass out. It was with an uneasy feeling she watched Becca go up on the uneven bars. She was doing a core strengthening exercises, going from hanging up to a handstand. Payson counted to 19, and was almost taking a deep breath of relief when Becca suddenly fell toward the ground.

Ignoring the images of her own fall, Payson ran between the beams and over the floor to the spot where Becca was laying alarmingly still. The other girls were gathered around her sister and she had to push past them to reach the small girl on the floor.

"Becca? Are you okay? Can you hear me?" Payson whispered as she took Becca's face between her hands. She cursed herself for letting Becca go back into the gym. If something happened to Becca, it was all on Payson.

"I'm fine," Becca mumbled.

"She's fine. Everybody back to training!" coach Jonson called.

Becca was on her way up from the floor but Payson pushed her down again. "Really Becca, how are you feeling?" Once again she felt an appreciation for her mother, being the decision maker when all Becca said was fine.

"Really Pay," Becca whispered. "Just a bit dizzy and a headache."

The name Amelia popped up in Payson's mind, but she didn't understand why. She pushed the thought away and concentrated on her sister on the floor.

"Are you coming Becca?" coach Jonson said.

Becca sat up and Payson could actually see the dizziness in her sisters eyes. "Becca needs to sit down for a moment, coach Jonson," she said over her shoulder.

"Miss Keeler, can I speak with you for a moment?" coach Jonson said, walking away from the other girls and motioned for Payson to follow her.

"Wait here Becca," she told her sister and followed coach Jonson.

"You know these girls needs to get right back up on the horse again," coach Jonson said.

"She hit her head pretty badly," Payson said, not believing she was having this conversation.

"She either gets back to training, or you can leave."

It wasn't a hard decision. Payson walked back to her sister who was still sitting on the floor. "How do you feel?" she asked. Becca mumbled something about going back to training. "I'm sorry Becs," Payson whispered, gently stroking Becca's face. "We're going home now. Do you think you can stand?"

"Yeah, coming," Becca said, slowly standing up. She was wobbling slightly. The fact that she wasn't complaining or protesting almost frightened Payson more than the fall itself. She waited while her sister slowly pulled on her sweatpants and a hoodie before taking her bag and walking out to the car.

Driving home, just a few blocks away from their house, the name Amelia popped up again. Or was it Amalia, Amanda, Amy? Maybe it was something completely different. She remembered the story though. A fall at practice ended with death. She turned the car around.

"Where are we going?" Becca asked, she sounded tired.

"I'm taking you to the hospital."

The lack of protests made Payson's heart beat faster. She might have broken a law or two driving the short way to the hospital.

Maybe sleeping in a hospital bed made everyone look smaller, but Payson couldn't drag her eyes away from her little sister. Not even two months in her care, and her sister spent her first night ever in a hospital. The doctors said she would be fine, a minor concussion and they would only keep her over the night for observation. She walked into the bathroom and left the door ajar. Calling Kelly, she had to work hard to keep her emotions in check.

"What's up Keeler?" Kelly answered.

"It's..." she took a deep breath. "Becca is fine, but she's at the hospital."

"What? What happened?" Kelly asked.

"She fell of the uneven bars. It's just a minor concussion, but I couldn't risk it."

"Of course, you did the right thing... What are you going to do?" the meaning was clear to the both of them. What was she going to do about coach Jonson? About The Rock.

"She's never going back to the Rock," Payson said, no hesitation in the decision. "I just... I need to find him."

"Sasha?"

"Yeah... Sasha... I need to find Sasha." She sighed. "Who else could I ever trust?"

.:.

A/N 3: I assume you can now guess who'll show up in the next episode? I'll probably post it toward the end of the week. Thanks again.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Thank you so much for reviews, story alerts and favorite adds. You've made my week.

Thanks to my beta, Ilse'sPurpleSummer.

.:.

Payson twisted her hands in front of her as she waited. Counting to ten, she knocked again, hoping she hadn't come all this way in vain. She turned and looked around the yard. There was a car was parked on the stone drive way, and the grass was only a little too long to be considered neat. With a sigh she walked down from the porch. Instead of walking back to her car, she decided to check out the backside of the small red and white cottage. A path led her around the house to a very cozy backyard, complete with a swing from one of the tall trees growing on the edge of the green grass.

The cottage's windows were dark, but she really didn't want to turn around now. What would she do? Sleep at a hotel for a night, two nights? How many days would she wait for him?

"Can I help you?"

She would recognize his voice anywhere, demanding and though, but not in any way unpleasant. The British accent was thick as ever. It still stirred something deep in her stomach. She turned around and faced her old coach for the first time in 5 years.

"Payson?" he said. It wasn't hard to see or understand why he was surprised to see her.

"Hi," she said with a shrug, not knowing what to do with herself. His calm blue eyes locked with hers and she felt like drowning.

"I'm so sorry about your parents," he said, pulling her into a tight hug. Not counting Kelly as she dropped Becca off for the weekend, it was the first hug she had gotten in ages. It started burning behind her eyes and the lump in her throat grew again. She had to let go before she broke down in his arms. "Come in Payson," he said, opening the door and letting her inside.

She followed him into a bright kitchen. It didn't look anything like she had expected his kitchen would look like. It was so... homey.

"The cottage has been in my family for generations, I haven't exactly change much," he said. He must have noticed her looking around. "Do you want coffee? Tea? Lemonade? Wine?"

"You're offering me alcohol?" she asked, almost laughing, it was something so ridiculous over the idea of her drinking with her former coach. Even if she was now 23 years old and he hadn't been her coach in five years.

He shook his head and smiled. "I'm still in shock, excuse me. How about coffee? Or tea?"

"Coffee would be wonderful," she said, sitting down on the edge of the sofa that was placed along one of the walls. She crossed her legs and arms, feeling suddenly cold and nervous. Her emotions were boiling inside her. After successfully shutting them out for days it felt like they were all coming back in like a big tsunami, and of course at the worst time ever.

"How's your sister?" Sasha asked, back turned to her.

"She's..." she was going to say fine, like she always did. They were always fine. Everything was fine... "Actually, I don't know."

Sasha turned to face her. He looked unhappy, sad almost. Like he wanted to say something but was holding it back. She wished he would tell her it would all be okay. She needed to hear it from him, with the same certainty he'd had in his voice when he spoke about her gymnastics dreams after her fall.

"I'm not sure I can do this," she said, the lump in her throat growing again. Sasha had been her parent's friend. Her mother had often told her about her conversations with Sasha, the last one had been only a couple of weeks before the accident. "How did mom and dad do it all? Decisions? Making everything better? Being there for both Becca and I? I just... I don't think I can do it Sasha." With the confession came the tears, silent tears rolling down her cheeks.

"Do what?" he asked, sitting down next to her, one arm around her shoulders. She hadn't come here to break down, but in the warmth of her former coach's embrace, she no longer could keep herself together.

"Everything," she sobbed. "I don't know how I'm going to be able to take care of Becca."

"Payson, you've always risen to the challenges. Remember after you broke your back? Even though you had to start from the bottom you worked your way up to the top. You can do anything you set your mind to."

"That was gymnastics. A stupid sport. This is real life. Becca fell, on my watch. She had to spend a night in the hospital..."

"Every strength you learned in the gym, made you a stronger person outside it. You're one of the strongest women I know." he whispered against her hair. "You'll figure it out."

"I came here to beg you to come back to coaching," Payson whispered.

"What?" Sasha asked. He let her go a little, looking down at her.

"Becca wants to go elite. Who should I trust her with, if not you?" she asked.

"Wow, already?" Payson smiled a little at the response, it was her exact words.

"She's 14, and apparently on the short list for junior worlds in 4 months."

"Time's moving so fast," he said, shaking his head.

"It's five years ago since London," she said, agreeing with him. She had no idea where time had gone. It was scary at times. One moment she was 17, winning Olympic gold, the next a 23 years old grad school drop out taking care of her 14 year old sister.

Sasha rose from the kitchen sofa where they has been sitting and moved over to the counter. "So where do you and Becca live now?" he asked, continue making the coffee with his back to her.

"We're in Boulder, but we're selling the house. I promised Becca that she'll be the one deciding on our next step. I go where she wants to train or go to school."

"That's very selfless of you," Sasha said. "I thought you studied in LA?"

She wiped away the last traces of tears on her face, it was stupid to break down, she could handle this like a grown up. "I took a break," she said. "I'll go back to school when Becca is older or finished with gymnastics."

"You already sound like a parent," Sasha said, he turned around and faced her. "I haven't coached since London. I don't even live in America full time any more."

"I know," Payson said, shaking her head. "I'm sorry I asked, I didn't mean to put you on the spot." She got up and walked toward the door. "I'm sorry I came like this. I didn't mean to unload everything on you. We do fine, both Becca and I. It was nice seeing you."

"Payson..."

She didn't stay to listen and he didn't try to stop her. She almost ran to the car and as she backed out of the driveway she had to wipe away tears to see the road clearly. She cursed herself as she realized she was crying again.

The tears wouldn't stop coming, so after only a few minutes she had to park the car on the side of the road. She felt so stupid, and angry at her self. How could she think that a trip to the Californian outback would solve everything. She was on her own. What would she do?

In her bag her cellphone started vibrating, she looked at the screen and saw Kelly's name and face. She didn't feel like talking with her best friend, but the thought that it might have happened Becca something made her answer.

"Hey, how's it going? Did you find him?"

Payson looked out over the calm lake next to the road, she understood why Sasha lived out here parts of the year, it was beautiful. And even if it was the middle, almost the end, of October, it was still heat in the air.

"No, it was a dead end," she lied and once again wiped away tears, they just kept coming.

"So are you coming home today?" she asked. "You know, you could take the evening off, go out in LA, meet your college friends. We're fine here in Denver. I think Becca likes me more than you."

"I just want to get home," she said with a shaky sigh.

"Is everything okay? You sound off?"

"It's fine. See you soon." She hung up before Kelly could ask any more questions. Wiping furiously at the tears she started the car again, continue driving toward the airport.

.:.

At the arrival hall Austin was waiting as promised. He took one look at her and then pulled her into a tight embrace. For what felt like the hundredth time that day she wanted to cry.

"It'll be okay," he whispered before letting her go.

The drive to Kelly and Austin's Denver apartment was quiet. When they got there it was already midnight and Becca was asleep. Kelly sat on the sofa in the living room, cups of tea were waiting for them.

"You haven't thought about coaching?" Kelly asked as they were all crawled up in the sofa.

Payson had a warm blanket around her, feeling exhausted after the emotional day. "A while ago I did, but not now. Not alone and not Becca... Anyone of you want to coach?" she asked, not really believing they would want to.

"I hate people," Kelly said shaking her head. "They annoy me, I would kill a teenager before the first day was over."

"I don't think coaching would be my thing," Austin said with a smile. "Being responsible, a gym full of kids, teenagers... It was enough living it once."

Payson couldn't help smiling at her friends. She thought they would be wonderful coaches, both of them... or at least Austin. Kelly might be too temperamental for the job. Payson was sure her friend would do the job way better than Coach Jonson had, but Kelly would probably end up with a gastric ulcer and possibly a self inflicted gun wound. The picture of Kelly surrounded by 15 teenage girls almost made Payson laugh out loud.

"Talking about kids," Kelly suddenly said.

Looking between her best friends Payson held her breath. Was this happening? Was she dreaming?

"I'm pregnant," Kelly continued, flashing a larger smile than Payson had ever seen on her friends lips. Austin's might have been even larger.

"Oh my god!" Payson said, throwing herself around Kelly's neck. "I'm so happy for you, congratulation!" She hugged Austin as well. "Wow, I guess that means we're getting old."

"Talk for yourself," Austin said. "I'm not old."

"Sorry, of course not," Payson smiled. Austin had been so touchy about age since he turned 28 a couple of months ago.

.:.

Sunday morning Payson and Becca drove back to Boulder. They hadn't talked about where Payson had been the previous day, but what was worse, they hadn't decided on a plan, regarding anything. The drive passed in silence and instead of going straight home, Payson drove by the lake and parked the car. It was getting cold outside, so neither of them stepped out of the car.

"We need to decide on what to do Becca," Payson said, drinking the last of the coffee she had in the McDonald's mug.

"We can't stay here, can we," Becca said, not looking at Payson. "There's nothing left for us here..."

Even though Payson agreed with her sister, she couldn't say it out loud. She didn't want Becca to feel forced away from a place that had been her home for nine years. It was the bigger part of her sister's life... "We decide if there's anything left worth staying for, Becca."

Silence grew between them, the only sound a slow song playing on the radio. Payson didn't know the song, but it was beautiful.

"Are Kelly and Austin going to have the baby in New York?" Becca suddenly asked.

Kelly spent most of her time in New York City, Payson had seen their apartment there and it was wonderful. It wasn't hard to guess they would have their base camp there when the baby came. It was so strange, thinking of Kelly and Austin as parents. She was sure they would be good at it, even if they were trying to sell themselves short sometimes.

"I think so, why?" Payson was leaning her head against the backrest, turning to watch her sister.

"It would be fun to live closer to them, wouldn't it?"

"Do you want to move to New York City?" Payson was almost holding her breath. Growing up she had never seen herself as a big city lover, but after a few years in Los Angeles she had changed her mind. It was amazing living amongst so many people, close to so many shops and cafés and restaurants.

Becca shrugged. "It would be kind of fun. The gym there is supposed to be good too."

A sudden hesitation hit Payson. Maybe a teenager was better off in a calm small town? Maybe there's less trouble to get into in Boulder compared to New York. She hoped she was doing the right thing, but how could she know? She didn't have the kind of superpower her mother seemed to have had.

"I'll make a few calls as soon as we get home," Payson said.

"I probably should go soon, I can't really miss any more practice, right?"

A few days was enough, especially so closely following a month off, Payson understood her sister. During her own time training, Payson had hated even missing one day of practice. The more you missed, the more you had to work to get back to where you already had been, instead of moving forward.

They drove home and as soon as they were inside, Becca took the phone and handed it to Payson.

"New York, I've made up my mind."

Payson nodded and took her purse with her into the living room. She had all the information she needed, after the research she had done the last few weeks. New York City sounded so good in Payson's ears, she just hoped it was the right move for her sister as well.

.:.

A/N 2: Don't worry. He will be back.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Thank you so much for all reviews, story alerts and favorite adds. Here's the next chapter. Let me know what you think.

The gym in New York City was one of the best gyms in the country. Payson was disappointed to hear from coach O'Malley, or Richard, as he asked to be called, that he was retiring. He wouldn't quit until there were an other, good, coach to take his place, but apparently he wanted to be honest about it. Which made Payson feel like New York would be a good choice. It was a bigger gym than The Rock, but from the way Richard spoke about it, it didn't seem too big or impersonal. Becca was welcome to start as soon as she could get to New York.

"We would love to have you as a part of our coaching staff," Richard said at the end of the conversation. "Your four golds in London was one of the biggest achievements, ever, in the sports."

"Thanks," Payson said. "I don't really feel prepared to coach yet." She was hoping to finish university before going back into sports, and then in the form of a physical therapist, not as a coach.

The next person she called was Kelly.

"Miss me already?" Kelly answered on the second ring.

"Becca made her decision," Payson said, actually smiling. "We're moving to New York City!"

Kelly's scream on the other end of the phone almost left Payson deaf. Kelly instantly started to plan where Payson and Becca would get an apartment, what they would do when they got there, where they would go shopping...

"Becca needs to get there as soon as possible," Payson said, cutting her friend short. "But I need to stay here and finish up with the house and everything..."

"She can come with us this afternoon," Kelly said, still worked up to an all time high of excitement. Payson wondered how she hadn't figured out about the pregnancy earlier. Kelly's mood had reached new extremes. "She can stay with us. Austin is home after the latest debacle," Kelly said. "It'll be like practicing on a real life teenager!"

After a calmer conversation they decided Payson would talk with Becca, and offer her to go with Kelly and Austin the same day.

.:.

On the way back from the Denver airport, Payson felt lonely and cold in the quiet car. She turned the radio on, but the empty sound didn't really chase the feelings away. Becca had wanted to leave with Kelly and Austin right away, and had packed two big suitcases in the time it took Payson to blink.

So after dropping Becca off at the airport, and talking to Kelly and Austin, she was now on her way back to the house. By herself. She hoped she could finalize the house selling and everything else and join Becca the coming weekend. The first they would have to do then was to go apartment hunting in New York. Kelly had promised to keep on the lookout for a place for them, which meant there would probably be a very expensive apartment waiting for her in a few days.

Monday morning Payson spent at the realtor's office. They had gotten some really good offers on the house. Which was a big surprise considering the bad global economy. They might have been able to up the price a little, but Payson just wanted it finished, so she gave the go ahead to sell it to the leading bidder.

Maybe it wasn't pleasant, but selling her parents house was a nicer task than what was waiting her after a quick lunch. She needed to collect Becca's things at The Rock. She sat in the car outside, in the parking lot, for what felt like hours before finally taking a deep breath and walk inside. It was 1 pm, which meant it was only elite gymnasts and coach Jonson there at the moment. Payson wasn't sure if that was a good or bad thing. But one thing she was sure of, she wouldn't back down, not this time.

Not bothering looking out over the gym, she simply walked in a fast pace toward the office. The parents had taken turns managing the office. Knocking on the door she was called in instantly.

"I'm sorry to bother you," she started, but as the blond woman behind the desk looked up, she couldn't get the rest of the sentence out.

"Oh, hello Payson! I heard you were back in town," Summer smiled her usual grin, showing every tooth in her mouth.

"Hi Summer," Payson said, forcing a smile on her lips. "I thought you lived in Florida, or something..."

"Well, after the wedding we moved back here. It's home after all," if possible, the smile grew. "Steve is still part owner of The Rock, and we just had to step in to handle the mess..." she fell silent.

"Oh, you and Mr. Tanner is back together?" Payson asked, instead of apologizing for the inconvenience her parents deaths meant for them. She felt nauseous and just wanted to get out of the room.

"Happily married for three years," she held out her left hand with a large ring on the fourth finger, as to prove a point. "How are you and Becca after everything? I've been praying for you. If you want to join me in church some day, the door is always open."

"Uhm, thanks, we're okay. We're actually moving, so I need Becca's file..." Payson said, fighting to keep the smile in place.

"Oh, that's too bad," Summer said, pouting. "I'll get it for you." she rose and walked over to the filing cabinet. Payson looked around the room as she waited- It looked exactly the same, but at the same time, nothing like it had done when Sasha worked there. On the other desk, the one across the room, stood a box.

"Oh, that's some of your mother's belongings, I was meaning to come by with it," Summer said, following Payson's eyes to the box.

"I can take it now," Payson said, even if she wanted to say the opposite. She took the file from Summer and put it in the box. "I'll empty Becca's locker as well," she said, taking the box and leaving the office.

"I'll continue praying for you!" Summer called after her.

The plan of shouting at coach Jonson was lost amongst all the feelings welling up as Payson tried not to look down into the open box. She could not do that, not at The Rock.

The whole drive home it felt like the box was mocking her from the backseat. Her eyes kept moving, on their own, to the review mirror to look at it. She just couldn't deal with the box. She thought dealing with her parents things were finished. At least the private things. Their bedroom and workplace were emptied, Payson spent days and nights there, throwing out things until it was finished. She just couldn't live in a house where her dead parents things were still around. She shivered.

Driving around the last corner and on to her parents street, she slowed down as the house came into view. There was a car on the driveway and a man sitting on the porch. She slowly drove the last way and parked the car next to the not so foreign other car.

She stepped out of her car and took the box from the backseat. When she came closer the man looked up. Looking into his eyes would probably always drag her five years back in time, whether she wanted it or not.

"What are you doing here, Sasha?" she asked, not wanting to let him see how he fazed her.

"I want to talk with you," he said as she unlocked the door. Walking inside she left the door open, it was all the invitation she would give him. She knew the anger was irrational, she didn't want to be angry with him, he didn't deserve that, not really...

She could hear him following her inside and closing the door behind him. She walked into the kitchen and put the box on the counter before starting making coffee. She avoided at all times to actually look at the content of the box, she even put Becca's gym folder on it, to cover it up. He came to the kitchen but stopped in the doorway, leaning against the wall.

"Where's Becca?" he asked.

"I dropped her at the airport. She went with Kelly and Austin, we're moving to New York City," she said turning to face him. "She's starting practice tomorrow. I'll follow as soon as we've sold the house."

"You move quickly," he said. "What happened? Why such a hurry?"

Payson shook her head, she was tired of thinking about it. She wanted to move forward. Sasha's eyes wandered to the box on the counter, he must have seen the folder because he walked over and picked it up. While he was slowly flipping through it, Payson took down coffee mugs and filled them up.

Turning around she saw that Sasha was looking at something in the box. Lips pressed together and eyes sad, he looked like somebody had kicked his puppy. Not sure if she really wanted to know what caused him to make the face, she slowly walked closer. As soon as she looked into the box she knew what it was. On the top were a framed photo of Payson, Becca and their parents at the Olympics in London. In the background she could see many people she knew, Kelly, Austin, Lauren and Sasha. She hadn't seen the picture before, but it was very nice. They were all laughing, it was probably after the All Around win. On the picture she had a gold medal around her neck. She guessed it could be after floor or uneven bars as well. It was a happier times, that was for sure. With a sigh she turned the picture upside down.

"What happened Payson?" he asked again.

She moved away from both the box, and Sasha, as she felt his hand touch her shoulder. "Becca fell, I had a fight with the coach..." she shook her head as she fell silent. It sounded stupid when she tried to explain it. "I didn't trust the coach," she added with a shrug. It always came back to that.

Taking both of the coffee mugs, she left the kitchen and walked into the living room. Sasha followed her once again, and they sat down as far away from each other they could come on the sofa.

"So you trust the coach in New York City?" he asked.

Not looking at him she bit her lip, of course she didn't. "Becca chose it. She thought it would be nice to be close to Kelly now when there will be a baby in the mix."

"Baby?" Sasha asked. Payson looked over in time to see his big eyes. She almost laughed, only almost. "Isn't she a bit young for that?"

"She's 24, Austin is 28. They're having a baby. It's not strange." God they were getting old. Her friends were building their lives, having careers, having children. What had she done? No, she quickly pushed the thought away. She was happy for her friends. She had no right to be bitter over things like that, she had worse things to feel bitter about.

"Where has time gone?" he whispered, probably more to himself than to her. "She's still with Austin? The rumor is that TC romances never lasts," he smiled a little and she guessed he was thinking of her and Rigo. It had ended only weeks after they left TC.

After the messy Kaylie and Austin brake up at TC nothing remained the same. Austin wasn't on the Olympic team in London, but he remained close during the last few months leading up to it. During the time at TC, Payson and Kaylie kind of grew apart. Payson had been spending time with Lauren and Kelly, while Kaylie found a new best friend in her childhood friend Jordan. And somewhere around all the drama, Kelly and Austin found each other. Austin had been like a big brother to Payson since his arrival to The Rock, and Kelly had become a very close friend, it had been natural that they spent time together. When the rest had happened Payson wasn't sure about.

When Payson and Kelly both beat out Kaylie for the Vault finals in London, causing her to miss the last chance for an individual medal, everything ran over the edge for her. Kaylie had spent minutes screaming at Kelly for stealing Austin from her, which Payson had thought was a well hidden secret up until then. Kaylie had then turned on Payson, blaming her for taking Kelly's side. This all happened in front of cameras from more than 100 countries. It was a well know, and well documented, mess.

"You knew about that?" Payson asked, curious how he always seemed to have known everything that happened in, and out, of the gym. "I mean before the whole debacle after the vault finals?"

"Of course, I'm not blind, or deaf. You guys were awful at keeping secrets."

"We kept several secrets, you just don't know about them," she smiled. It was one thing she had always wondered about though. "How did you know about the party we went to? It was just after you arrived in Boulder?" It was one of many things she hadn't figured out about him, and it might be the most annoying thing. How had he found out?

"I'm an all-knowing god, you didn't know?"

If she had been closer to him she would have punched his shoulder. "So annoying," she whispered.

Their smile faded after just a few seconds. The silence grew between them and quickly started to feel uncomfortable. Payson sipped her coffee, Sasha had shown up at her door, he would have to do the talking.

"I was very surprised when you came the other day," he finally said. "I just arrived from London a few days before that."

Payson nodded, watching the black screen of the tv across the room. She knew what was coming. It was excuses, apologies. She cradle the cup of coffee with both hands, wishing the heat would transfer to the rest of her body.

"You don't need to apologize," she said. "I understand. I didn't mean to come to California and freak out on you... I understand that you can't put your life on hold just because I come crying," she shook her head. How she wished she had handled the situation differently.

"I wish..." Sasha started but fell quiet again.

"I know," Payson whispered. She also wished things were different.

Sasha rose. "I probably should go," he said.

Payson nodded. She wanted to go down on her knees to beg him to stay. Fall in his arms and just ask him to hold her through the night. She wanted to scream and curse at him for abandoning her when she needed him, when Becca needed him. Instead she rose and collected the coffee mugs from the table.

"Thank you for coming by," she said, barely recognizing her own voice.

"Payson," he said. "Payson," he repeated when she didn't look at him.

"I'm fine Sasha," she said, looking up at the man she had trusted with her life. "Don't worry about me."

He closed the distance between them and put his arms around her, pulling her into a tight embrace. Payson focused on the mugs in her hands, refusing her body to relax in the warmth.

"I'm sorry," he whispered and then he was gone.

Counting to ten Payson remained standing in the middle of the living room. When she was sure no tears would escape she continued into the kitchen. Even though it was 11 pm, she had no desire to go to bed, so instead she got a paper box from the hallway and started to pack up the kitchen.

A/N 2: Once again, he will be back. I promised you a Payson/Sasha story and this will be one. As soon as the stupid characters agrees to be in the same room and stop acting stupid. Sometimes when I write, I get annoyed at myself, but I just couldn't do this any other way.

Can I bribe you with some Payson/Sasha videos at the meantime? Check out my youtube channel hxxp:/www(dot)youtube(dot)com/user/ellascott86/videos


	6. Chapter 6

A week after Becca left for New York City, Payson followed. She had cleaned out the house by working basically 24/7. Together they had decided that they didn't want to use any of the old things in a new apartment. It would be too... depressing. So almost everything was sold off, thrown out or sent to their grandmother in Minnesota.

Sunday afternoon, on Halloween, as Payson arrived to JFK airport she was met by two dressed up, supposedly, grownups, and Becca. Payson couldn't help smiling as Austin, dressed up as a Mafia boss, he told her later, hugged her tightly. As soon as he let go, Kelly took over the hug. Kelly was dressed up in a very short dress, lots of jewelry and an empty champagne glass in one of her glove dressed hands.

"What are you dressed as?" she asked her friend when she was let out of the bone crunching hug and could once again breathe.

"I'm the Mafia boss's mistress," Kelly smiled.

Payson couldn't help laughing before turning and hugging her sister. "Why aren't you dressed up?" she asked.

Becca shrugged. "I'm the orphan girl."

"Becca!" they all gasped.

"That's so morbid!" Austin laughed. When Austin started laughing, neither of the the others could stop themselves from doing the same. People turned to look at the weird group of people, laughing as if they gone crazy. It took several minutes before they could collect themselves enough to make their way to the AirTrain.

"Why did you fly into JFK?" Kelly asked as they finally got on the subway, twenty minutes later. "It's a bitch to get here, and even worse to get home!"

"Sorry, it was the best flight," she said with a shrug.

"Talking about home. Becca and I have been apartment hunting," Kelly smiled, looking excited.

"I'm not surprised," Payson said, taking a faster grip around the pole she was holding on to as the subway accelerated. "Did you find anything?" she asked her sister.

Becca nodded. "One of the apartments were really nice," she said. "It's not far from Kelly or the gym or NYU."

"NYU?" Payson asked, confused, why did Becca put that in the mix?

"I thought you might want to go back to school..." she said, suddenly hesitating a little. "Richard said that when you're a physical therapist he thinks you should start working at the gym, and for the national team."

"So you think I should go back to school?" Payson asked. It was a conversation they should have in private, not in a subway cart full of people. "Then I can't be with you in the gym that often, and I'll have homework on weekends, so I might not be able to come to all competitions..." she added. She wanted Becca to understand what it would mean if she went back to school, if it was even possible. She couldn't help feeling a little hopeful. She had missed school, and not only the life she'd had around school, but the classes, the essays. It felt more right now, becoming a physical therapist, than it had done back in school.

"I'll be fine," Becca said. "And now when Austin's in the gym every day you don't need to worry."

"Austin in the gym?" Payson asked surprised, turning to her friend. She had talked to either Kelly, Austin or Becca every day, and this was the first she heard of it.

"Yes, well. I don't know how it happened," Austin said.

"They stroke your ego, that's what happened," Kelly said with a slight shake of her head and a roll of her eyes.

"Maybe... Somehow I ended up becoming an assistant coach."

"You told me barely a week ago you wouldn't coach," Payson said, still in chock.

"Yes...Well... Now I've changed my mind. As an assistant coach I don't even have any big responsibilities. I'm just told what to do and can basically play in the gym all day," his smile was bigger than a kid's in a candy store. She recognized the feeling. The feeling of missing gymnastics didn't make itself known until you came in contact with the sport again. It's like a sober alcoholic tasting a small sip of wine. You just want more.

.:.

The following morning Payson followed Austin and Becca to the gym. Even if Becca seemed to already like the gym, and Austin was there full time, she wanted to make sure it all went okay before even thinking of going back to school.

The gym in New York City was like everything else in the city, big and full of people. It was probably three times as large as The Rock. She couldn't remember having been there before.

"Through there is a really great fitness center," Becca said, pointing to the door in the hallway that was opposite the door leading to the gym. "And there," pointing at an other door. "Is a very big and beautiful kitchen and a kind of hang out spot for us who are doing homeschooling. There's like ten other girls also in the homeschooling program," Becca was smiling bigger than Payson had seen in months. "Come meet Richard." Payson felt her sister take her hand and lead her into the gym.

Payson was glad her sister was calling her coach by first name. Coach - athlete was a close relationship and it should be on first name basis.

"Richard, this is my sister, Payson," Becca said stepping inside the office.

"It's nice to meet you coach O'Malley," Payson said, shaking the tall, grey haired coach's hand.

"Please, call me Richard. I feel so old every time people use my last name. It's some youth in the name Richard, right Becca?"

Becca nodded, still smiling. "I'll go start the warmup," Becca said and quickly disappeared.

"She seems to like it here," Payson said also smiling.

"She fitted right in," Richard said and motioned for her to sit down on the sofa that was placed along the right wall of the office. "We have a good group of elite girls here, I think they'll really take care of your sister."

"I'm pleased to hear that," Payson said. This was how it was supposed to be to meet your sisters coach for the first time. "I have Becca's file from The Rock with me," she said, handing it over. The file consisted of current and old routines, medical checkups and fitness tests results.

"Thank you," Richard said and placed it on the desk. "I'll go through it today. But before that, would you like a short tour? Meet the assistant coaches?"

"I don't want to take up too much of your time..."

"Nonsense," Richard said, a swiping motioned with his hand in the air made it look like ha was actually trying to shoot away her words. "Come, I'll show you the coffee maker as well."

"Well, I can't say no to that," Payson laughed. She loved this place already.

After meeting the assistant coaches Matt, Sonia and of course Austin, seeing the gym and fitness center she found her way to the holy grail; the coffee maker in the kitchen. She poured herself a cup before making her way up to the parents viewing area. The different between The Rock and the New York City gym were clear even up there. The viewing area was a floor above the rest of the gym, had close to thirty seats and by the way the area looked it was used as some kind of audio booth during competition.

Payson sat down in the back and spotted Becca at once. She seemed to be in a discussion with a few other girls over at the beam, they were all laughing and Becca looked so much more relaxed than Payson had seen her during the last couple of months. She couldn't help feeling relaxed herself.

After practice ended Payson headed down to the gym doors, waiting for Becca to finish the last stretching and talking with her friends. The relaxed atmosphere during warmups and stretching kind of reminded Payson of the old days at The Rock.

"Payson, could I talk with you for a minute?"

Payson turned around and saw Richard calling for her from his office. Becca was still talking with some new friends, so she walked over to the office. Richard closed the door behind them and once again motioned for her to sit down in the sofa.

"Austin let slip that you were trying to find Sasha Belof, to see if he would be interested to come back to coaching, is that right? Because we would be very interested in him coming here."

Payson took a deep breath, she would have to tell her friends soon, but she guessed she had to start by telling Richard. They needed to find a good replacement for the soon 70 years old coach, they couldn't put all their hope to Sasha, like she had done.

"I did talk to Sasha," she said. "He wasn't interested, I'm sorry."

"Oh, it sounded on Austin like you hadn't talked to him," Richard said.

"Well," Payson said, trying to figure out how to explain the lie.

"You don't need to explain," Richard said with a small smile. He really was like a grandfather, all calm and understanding. "I hope Becca is happy here, if there's anything you're wondering about, don't hesitate to ask."

"Thank you Richard, I think Becca made the right decision, coming here."

After dinner two days after Payson's first day watching Becca at the gym, Austin cornered her in the living room after dinner. Kelly was putting away the dishes and Becca was in the guest room doing homework.

"How come Richard said Sasha wasn't an option any more?" Austin asked, his voice barely stronger than a whisper. "Did you find him?"

Payson nodded, she had meant to bring up the conversation, but her nerves had gotten the best of her. Her heart was pounding and she had a lump in her throat. "He wasn't interested," she said.

"Not interested?" Austin asked. "Let me get this straight, you asked him and he said no?" He didn't need to wait for her answer, it was probably readable on her face. "That stubborn, stupid..."

Payson cut him short. "Don't blame him, it was wrong of me to ask, please Austin, just..." she fell silent as her voice was close to breaking.

"Hey, don't worry about it," he said, pulling her into a hug. "It'll turn out for the best."

Payson doubted it was true but let the words comfort her anyway.

"Hello! Let the pregnant woman doing all the work, why don't you!" Kelly suddenly shouted from the kitchen, causing them both to laugh. Kelly was moody without being pregnant, but now, high on hormones, Payson was afraid she would actually explode.

.:.

Payson ended up going with Becca to the gym every other day the first week. She enjoined sitting there, breathing in the chalky air and listen to the familiar terms of gymnastics being thrown around. It was something very comfortable and calming about being in a gym. She often chose to sit out on the bleachers so that she could hear what was going on out on the floor.

Friday morning she was sitting on the bleachers, looking over her pro and con list for the different apartments she and Becca had been looking at the last few days.

"Payson! Pay?"

She looked up at her sisters shout, panic starting to grow in her chest. After a quick scan of the floor she realized everything was okay. Becca was standing in the middle of the square marked for floor exercises in the other end of the gym, she had her hands on her hips and looked determent. Next to her were Richard and they were both waving for her to come down. She finished her coffee and put down her things in the purse before heading downstairs. Before walking out on the floor she took her shoes and socks off. Walking on the springy floor brought back memories that she quickly forced herself not to think of.

"What's going on?" she asked as she reached the duo.

"We're remaking Becca's floor routine for junior worlds," Richard started.

"If I'm going," Becca added, low voice. Payson had noticed that her sister was more and more nervous about it. The competition in Texas the first weekend of December, which was now a month away, would be the qualifying competition for Junior Worlds, which would take place in Berlin in the end of February. The closer the competition got, the more focused Becca seemed to become, and not only in the gym, Becca was now out running at least every other day for an hour or two after training.

"So why am I here?" she asked, looking between the tall dark coach and her short, thin sister.

"I want to use the artistic ability your sister has. It's visible in all her routines, and just like you rebuilt yours, I want to change Becca's. A part of your high scores came from your ability to reach the judges. Your skills were enough to win, but that last part made you untouchable at the Olympics. I think your sister can do the same."

Payson nodded slowly, she wasn't surprised, her sister had always been the more graceful of them. Becca had taken dance lessons when she was younger, Payson remembered her sister crying when she had to chose between the dance and gymnastics. She looked at her sister, the excitement was written on her face.

"What am I doing here?" she asked, feeling suspicious. None of her old coaches had run her routines by her parents, that she knew of at least.

"Well, Richard said he's not very good at dance and stuff," Becca said, twisting her hands as she spoke. "So maybe you want to help us?"

Was this a trick? By the look on Richard's face he knew exactly what he was doing, but all she could see on her sisters face was excitement. If this was what Becca wanted, she couldn't say no. Even if the 70 years old coach had some ulterior motives, like trying to trick her into coaching.

"I'm not sure it's my strong side either, but we can try," she said, watching her sister make a small victory jump before containing herself again.

A couple of hours later, as they paused for lunch, they at least had an idea of what Becca could do and what she wanted for her routine. Becca was really good at the dance elements, and Payson couldn't understand how none of Becca's earlier coaches hadn't tapped in on it earlier.

"Pay, do you wanna go out for lunch?" Austin asked, coming jogging up behind her as she left the gym. She hadn't had anything special planned for lunch, so she was grateful for the company. "Let's head to that Italian restaurant a couple of blocks away."

Payson wasn't very orientated in New York City yet, so she was grateful for every new thing she learned.

It only took five minutes or so to walk to the restaurant and they barely had to wait at all to get their food. Payson ate a salad while Austin ate pasta.

"So they tricked you out on the floor?" Austin said after a few minutes of comfortable silence. "Richard asked me a few days ago how he could get you more involved," he smiled. "Do you like it? Coaching?"

Payson had enjoined the morning spent working with her sister, but she really couldn't see herself being a coach. At least not a head coach, she didn't want to be the person who shouted at others what to do. One on one was fun, but she could never lead a group. She explained the best she could for her friend. "If anything," she added. "It makes me more motivated to go back to school. I would love to be involved in gymnastics again, as a physical therapist. I think I could be good at it."

Austin left it at that and they finished their lunch in silence. When the waiter came back and asked if they wanted anything else, Payson ordered a coffee.

"To go, and one for me as well," Austin said, taking his card out to pay.

"Why the hurry?" Payson asked as the man had disappeared. "We have over an hour until we need to be back."

"I thought we would take a walk," he said. "I'll show you some good stores I think you'll like. We can get to know the neighborhood."

It sounded like a very good idea, so Payson got up and took her leather jacket and scarf on. It was getting cold outside.

As they walked Austin pointed out server nice stores and cafés. Payson hadn't realized the gym was located in such a nice neighborhood. She and Becca just taken the subway between Kelly and Austin's apartment and the gym, they hadn't really taken the time to look around yet.

"This is supposed to be a really good bookstore, I think you would like it," Austin said, pointing across the street.

Payson came to a stop. The bookstore looked huge, at least three floors high. "Can't we go inside?" she didn't exactly need more new books, but who could resist a bookstore?

"We don't have time now, an other time," Austin said, pulling her along.

As they turned around the next corner Payson saw a sign pointing out that New York University was right around the next corner, she came to a stop and turned to look at her friend. "What are we doing here?" she asked.

"Remember how you just said you're motivated to go back to school? It happened like fifteen minutes ago?" Payson wanted to slap her friend but didn't. She let him continue. "You have an appointment with the dean of admission, professor Fitzgerald in," he checked the time. "Ten minutes."

Payson felt her blood turn cold. "What?" she asked. "I'm not dressed for a meeting, I don't have my papers with me..."

Austin took a demonstrative step back and looked her up and down. She was dressed in black skinny jeans, an orange top and a black cardigan under the leather jacket.

"You look great," he said. " Just like a student. And you have everything in that iPad, don't try to trick me."

After taking a few calming breaths she nodded, this could be the chance of a lifetime for her. A quick check in her purse she spotted some make up that she rarely used. "I need a restroom," she said, looking around.

"There's probably one in the same house as the dean's office, I'll show you."

Fourty five minutes later, as Payson stepped out of the dean's office, she felt her body relax. It was like she had run a marathon or been in the gym the entire day. She was exhausted. The meeting had gone well, very well actually. It was basically a done deal by now, what was left to figure out for NYU was in which class to put her. They would go over her transcripts and courses to make sure she didn't miss anything. If it went as planned, she would be back in school after Christmas break.

Knowing the gymnasts always started the afternoon session with warmup, she didn't need to rush back to the gym. She and Becca had some more work to do on the floor routine, but she would be back in plenty of time for apparatus training to start. So she sat down on a bench on campus, digging out her iPhone. She didn't actually have anyone to call, since she would be seeing her sister, Kelly and Austin within a few hours. Instead she plugged the earbuds in and pressed shuffle. She had always liked music. Not like she was a fanatic, or went to many concerts or knew much about it, she just loved to listen to the music and hear the lyrics. It made her relax, or focus, or cry, all depending on the music. She hadn't listened much the last few months, but now she really needed the music.

After a few songs she started walking toward the gym. She felt lighter than she had done in weeks. One week in the city and it seemed like both Becca and she had their life's back on track, or at least they were heading that way. Everything wasn't perfect, but they were doing something, moving forward.

Turning the last corner to the gym a new song came on. The powerful music made her stop, it moved her five years back in time in the blink of an eye. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, listening to the lyrics.

_I was looking for a breath of life. _

_For a touch of heavenly light. _

_But all all the choirs in my head say no oh oh._

_To get a dream of light again. _

_A little vision of the sight at the end. _

_But all the choirs in my head say no oh oh._

It was a song she had loved five years go, she had listened to it the months leading up to the Olympics. She hurried inside the gym and found her sister.

"Becca, I think I have the music," she said. "It might need some editing, but I think you'll like it."

"Let's hear it," Becca said, more or less dragging Payson with her to the floor where she had previously worked. Payson put her iPhone in the docking station to the speakers and started the song. She studied Becca and her sister's coach as they listened to the song. Becca's smile grew larger and larger, the more of the song she heard.

"I remember this one," Becca said as the song died. "You used to listen to it, when I was younger, right?"

Payson nodded. "I just heard it again today now when I was out walking. I thought it would be a good fit."

The both sisters turned to Richard, waiting on his final, deciding, thoughts. He nodded. "I like it. Could be really good. You two better get started. I need to check on the other girls, call me over if you need me."

After an hour of playing, replaying and replaying the song again. They had a sketch of the routine.

"From the top Becca," Payson said from the sideline where she was keeping notes on her iPad. The dean of admission was right, she was part of the technology generation. He hadn't seemed like he thought it was a negative thing so Payson wouldn't see it as that either. "A bit closer to the corner," she said and pointed. "The intro is really short, you need to be in the corner to start the tumbling pass the second the lyrics come on."

Timing was everything with this routine, just as it had been with Payson's back in the day. She started the music and watched her sister do the intro once again. It went better, the timing was better.

"Good work Becca," she said, pausing the music. "You just need to..."

"Work on the extensions," a voice interrupted from behind. Even if she hadn't heard it two weeks ago, she would have recognized it anywhere. Her heart had stopped beating in her chest and she couldn't breathe as she turned around. He was really there. Dressed in jeans and a biker jacket. They looked at each other. A million questions were swimming around her head, there were so many she couldn't pick one and move it from her brain to actually voice it.

"Sasha, good to see you! Let's talk in my office," Richard said. His voice broke the spell and Payson could look away again. She turned to her sister.

"I need to go," she said, her voice was barely more than a whisper. "Austin will take you home. You can borrow my phone for the music..." she only gave her sister time to nod before she was jogging through the gym. It felt like the walls were falling in, suffocating her. She needed to get out.

.:.

A/N: So, he's finally in New York City, and he's there to stay, I promise.

I don't know much about the physical therapist programs in USA, just like I don't know much about gymnastics. But I'm not going to focus on those details. Instead of doing the research, I'm focusing on the characters and moving the story forward (and sometimes it moves a bit too fast, I know).

Please let me know what you think, it's actually helping me forming the story. I do have an outline of how the story will go, but with your comments I end up changing some things. A really big thing really, I'll let you know when it comes up in the story. I've already written several chapters after this, so I'll try to have the next chapter up on Tuesday, before I go on a short vacation.

The song is Breath of Life by Florence + The Machine. It's brilliant, check it out.


	7. Chapter 7

Payson stood on Times Square, watching the neon lights and the people hurrying by. She wondered how many of them had control over their lives. How many were happy? Sad? In love? She tried to focus on anything else than the chaos of feelings inside her. After years of competitive gymnastics, of walking into full arenas with the expectations of her country on her shoulders, she had never been closer to an anxiety attack than now. How could he affect her like this? Why did he make her feel like this?

Wandering the city wasn't helping at all, so she slowly made her way back to Kelly and Austin's apartment. Kelly looked strangely at her, but didn't have time to start the questioning before Austin and Becca also came home.

"You can't guess what happened today," Becca said, literarily bouncing in to the living room. "Sasha Belof is going to be our new coach. He and Richard is going to work together the rest of the year and then Sasha is going to take over."

Feeling like passing out she had to sit down on the sofa. "Wow," was all she could say. How had this happened? When had it happened? Why did he change his mind? Thousands of questions, but none made their way past Payson's lips.

"Aren't you happy," Becca asked. "He's your old coach."

"Yeah," she said, nodding slowly. "I'm very happy Becca, he's a great coach."

"He said he really liked the start of my floor routine, he want us to continue working on it on Monday afternoon."

"Hey Becca, do you wanna help me in the kitchen? I'm starving, we need food," Austin said, looking between Kelly and Payson. It looked like they were reading each other's minds.

Kelly sat down next to Payson on the sofa, so close that their legs and shoulders touched. Payson wasn't sure how much Kelly knew, how much Austin had told her. But it seemed like she knew enough to understand that Payson didn't want to talk about it yet. So they sat side by side, in silence, until Becca came and told them the food was ready.

Payson and Becca shared the guest room in Kelly and Austin's apartment. It wasn't the best arrangement, but it worked. Payson was normally a very good sleeper. If there had been an Olympics in sleeping, she would have medaled, with ease. But that was before Sasha first turned her down, and then suddenly showed up again, just to turn her down again, and now he was back and suddenly he was on board the coaching train again. She just didn't know what to do about it. What did it mean? Was it short term? Who had talked with him? With a sigh she got up. It was Saturday and she was up at five. Practice didn't start until nine, so Becca would be sleeping for a while yet. She put on workout clothes and her running shoes and got outside. Running was one of the best way to clear her mind.

"Are you coming to the gym?" Becca asked as Payson made her way out of the shower. Her legs were wobbly and she could still feel the taste of blood in her mouth. She was far from as fit as she used to be.

"Do you want me to?" Payson asked, twisting her wet hair up in a towel-turban on her head.

"Don't you need to talk with the new coach? Even if you know him?"

Of course her sister had thought further than Payson herself had. "Yeah, of course," she said. "I'll come with you."

The gym was filled with more parents than usual. The gym didn't have any kind of parents contract, like The Rock had. They weren't required to spend any more time in the gym than they wanted, the only thing that actually was required by the parents, was to pay their bills and to take turns being chaperones at competitions and camps. But this morning, as the Keeler sisters got to the gym at ten to nine, the gym was full of parents. To Payson's relief it was basically a line of people, wanting to talk to Sasha.

"I'll talk with him when everything calms down," she said to Becca. "Call on me if you need help with the floor routine." She gave her sister a quick hug before making her way up the stairs. Finding a spot up top, in the back of the bleachers, she sat down, pulling her legs up to hug her knees. She couldn't figure out if she should be happy Sasha was here, annoyed at him, angry even? This was what she wanted, right? But he had turned her down, twice. What was he doing here now? Her head was spinning.

Even though Payson tried to focus on her sister, she couldn't stop her eyes from over and over finding to the only British person in the gym. Sasha was mostly walking around the gym, talking with the girls and the parents as he went. He stopped by Becca a couple of times. She couldn't see or hear what they were talking about, but Becca looked relaxed, happy even.

What she could hear, on the other hand, were the parents around her talking. She usually tried to ignore it, she mostly found it annoying, parents trying to be experts. But today they were talking about Sasha, so she couldn't completely ignore it.

"He was an amazing coach," one woman, two rows in front of Payson said to the women next to her. "His team basically won every medal in London 2012."

"The US won four golds, one silver and two bronzes, that's hardly every medal. And all girls weren't from his gym."

"Payson Keeler was his athlete, he coached her to four golds, that makes him one of the most successful coach in American history!"

"Talking about Payson Keeler, didn't he have an inappropriate relation ship with her? Do we really want a man like that around our kids?"

"Four golds Megan!" the first woman said. "You just need to keep your girls in check, I heard it was she who had a crush on him. He wasn't suspended or anything, in the end, so it was probably a misunderstanding."

How could one stupid kiss follow them for so long? Payson sighed. She was glad to hear that the most parents seemed happy though. And amongst the girls on the floor it looked very calm and everyone seemed happy. Hopefully it would stay calm and she could stay out of everything.

Turning her gaze over at her sister again she saw that Becca was trying to get her attention. She was also pointing, discretely, at Sasha. Looking at the time she realized it was only little over half an hour left of practice. With a deep sigh she rose and headed down. The women who had previously discussed her gymnastics career and crush looked mortified as they spotted her. It was kind of fun.

Sasha was standing on the steps outside the office. She waited until he had finished talking with a woman dressed in a very short skirt. Must have been very cold getting here, Payson though. He had spotted her, but didn't do anything else than sit down on the step. Counting to three she finally put one foot in front of the other and walked over to sit down next to him. She didn't know what she felt yet. It was so complicated. She was happy, relived, hurt, wounded, lonely. The emotions just went on and on, she was too scared to really listen to her feelings, it was easier to just push them back.

"Hi," she said.

"Hi," he said and they fell silent.

"You've been busy," she said, watching her hands in her lap.

"Everyone knows the monkey, isn't that the saying?"

"I didn't mean to force you out of retirement," she finally said. "We'll be okay anyway."

"You didn't force me," he said. "I'm sorry I didn't come right away... And I should have been at the funeral. I'm sorry Payson."

Biting her lip until the lump in her throat disappeared she took a few deep breaths. "You've nothing to apologize for. I'm glad you're here. We'll always be in debt to you... I already owe you..."

"You don't owe me anything Payson."

There were already a line of people who wanted to talk to Sasha, so Payson stood. Sasha did the same. The awkwardness grew again. "I should go, let the other people talk with you," she said.

He nodded. "See you on Monday?" he asked. "Becca said you were working on the floor routine."

"Yeah, I'll be here," she said. She turned to leave, but hesitated. "I'm really glad you're here," she said again. "I've missed you."

She left before Sasha had time to answer her. In the stairs on the way up to the bleachers, the phone started vibrating in her purse. It was a number she couldn't recognize, so she walked down again and stepped out in the lobby to answer.

"Hello, I'm calling for Payson Keller."

"This is her," she said.

"Oh good. My name is Timothy Jones, I showed you the apartment you put a bid on a few days ago."

"Of course, Mr Jones," Payson said, finally recognizing the voice. "How are you?"

"I'm calling because the owner of the apartment want a quick close. So she wants to offer you the apartment."

"Oh," Payson hadn't counted on it going so quickly. "When do you need a decision?"

"Monday morning," the man said.

They ended the call and Payson remained standing in the lobby. It was a nice apartment they had put a bid on, but suddenly it all felt so real. They had sold the house and was moving somewhere else. They weren't just visiting Kelly and Austin. They had left Boulder, for good.

"Pay, can I go with Hanna and Kate today? They invited me to a girls night at Kate's place," Becca suddenly said from the doorway to the gym.

Decision, decision, would it ever end? "Are their parents here? I probably should speak with them first..." yeah, that's what their mother would have done, she was pretty sure.

.:.

Monday morning came around quickly. Instead of following Becca to the gym at seven in the morning, Payson spent an extra half an hour in front of the mirror in the bathroom. She got dressed in a grey suit, red high heel and put her hair up in a tight bun. Instead of taking the subway to the gym, she headed two stations uptown. Mr Jones was waiting on the sidewalk as she arrived.

"Good morning," he said, holding out a cup of coffee for her. She gratefully accepted and returned the greeting. "Would you like to see the apartment again before signing the papers?" Mr Jones said, waving a thin folder in the hand he wasn't holding his own coffee in.

"If you don't mind," Payson said, feeling the excitement grow. She and Becca had been there just the day before, one of Mr. Jones assistants had let them in and showed them around. Payson had loved the apartment from the beginning, that's why she had put a bid on it, but she had wanted Becca to see and like the place before deciding. Becca had loved it, so Payson was now there to sign the lease.

Walking around the apartment once again Payson knew they were doing the right thing. She signed the papers, that her former agent MJ had helped her to look over, and suddenly she was alone in the apartment, keys in her hand.

The apartment had two bedrooms and bathrooms, a nice kitchen that connected to the living room through the dining area. It was a large apartment for being in the city. It also had a small balcony, which Payson already loved. She stepped out and looked around the neighborhood. The street was full of people, restaurants and coffee shops. This was good, as good as it could be right now.

Before making her way to the gym, she walked past a furniture store and bought two beds which would be delivered the same afternoon. She also bought blankets, duvets, pillows and linens. The rest could wait until she and Becca could go shopping together.

"Wow, I keep expecting to see the 17 years old version of you," Sasha said as Payson walked inside the lobby of the gym. She was still wearing the clothes from this morning.

"I had a meeting," she said, looking down at her clothes and suddenly wishing she had changed before going to the gym. "When do you want me and Becca to work on the floor routine?" she asked.

Sasha looked up and met her eyes instead of studying her clothes. "Now is fine, they just started apparatus training. I'm trying to learn everyone's routines," he said, shaking his head. "My brain needed a slight break so I was hiding out here," he smiled a little.

Learning twenty girls' routines, on four apparatuses, couldn't be easy. Payson had trouble remembering Becca's routines. It was one thing to learn routines one was performing yourself, just watching and remembering? Difficult.

"Richard said he would work with you when you arrived, I'll come by later," Sasha said, holding up the door for her. She could hear him take a deep breath and follow her inside. She briefly wondered if he regretted coming here. But she didn't have time to ask him, because as she entered the gym she was thrown into the focused air that always surrounded gymnasts doing apparatus training.

Becca was just starting her uneven bars routine and Payson waited by the doors, watching her sister. Just as for Payson at that age, uneven bars was her sister's best event. Not until Becca landed her dismount perfectly, Payson took her shoes of and walked over to her sister.

"How did it go with the apartment?" was the first thing Becca asked as she came over.

"I signed the papers," Payson said and dangled the keys in front of her.

"We should go shopping after training," Becca said, jumping up and down as she talked.

Payson agreed, but it wasn't the time to talk about it now, she could see both Richard and Sasha studying them from across the gym. "Well, let's go work on your floor routine," Payson said, trying to sound like a coach would.

At nine o'clock the same evening Payson was exhausted. They were sitting on the floor of the empty living room, eating take away thai food. They had gotten the beds, and the boxes that Payson had sent from the old house was transferred, with their suitcases, from Kelly and Austin's apartment. But there were no other things in the apartment. During the afternoon shopping, they had forgotten to buy cutlery. It was a good thing they both knew how to eat with the chopsticks that came with the food. They might have messed up the prioritization list when they ended up looking at things like pillows, bedspreads, art and other knickknack for the apartment, instead of actual furniture.

"I'm beat," Becca sighed. "I think I'll go to bed."

Payson nodded. "I'll do the same in a minute," she said.

As Becca disappeared into her room the silence surrounded Payson. She looked around the empty living room, trying not to compare it to the old house. Getting up she cleared away the empty food containers and took a water bottle from the fridge. Walking to her room she could suddenly hear soft sobs from Becca's room. She leaned against the wall, trying to steady herself. Becca must be feeling the same as Payson herself was feeling. This was real now. They weren't just visiting Kelly and Austin. They had sold their parents house and most of the stuff. Payson had thought she would feel kind of free after the move, like some of the responsibilities had been lifted from her shoulder. And with Becca looking so happy... She sighed and realized nothing had changed, not really. They were still the orphan girls, just in NYC rather than Boulder.

She knocked on Becca's door and slowly opened it. Becca was laying in her bed, cover all the way up to her head. Payson could only see the back of her sister's head, the blond hair spread over the pillow.

"How does the new bed feel?" Payson asked.

"Very nice," Becca said, voice almost steady. If Payson hadn't heard her sister cry just minutes earlier she wouldn't have noticed anything. She silently wondered how many times she had missed her sister crying because she hadn't heard the sobs. "I should go to sleep..." Becca said.

"Sure," Payson said. "Just wanted to remind you that we need to go out for breakfast tomorrow, so we need to leave earlier than usual."

"I've set the alarm on the phone," Becca said, still her back to the door. "Good night."

"Good night Becca," she said and carefully closed the door.

The ever present lump in her throat felt larger and larger as she went into her own room and closed the door behind her. It felt like the universe punched her in the gut and pulled away the rug under her feet at the same time. Of course it wouldn't be this easy, it was stupid of Payson to believe that.

.:.

The gloom feeling seemed to follow both Payson and Becca around the following week. They went furniture shopping after Becca's training, and even if they had fun at times, it lacked the giddy feeling the first day in the new apartment had been. Payson kept following Becca to the gym every second or third day. They were still working on the floor routine, but it came together nicely. The days she didn't spend in the gym, Payson spent walking around the city. The busy streets kept her mind from wandering. Every day she visited a new lunch restaurant and spend at least an hour at a new coffee shop, reading old course literature in preparation of going back to school.

The days dragged along, but somehow, it was already Thanksgiving. Payson had been trying not to think about the holidays coming up, it was just too depressing. As she walked inside the gym she once again pushed the thoughts away. She was on her way to the bleachers when she heard her name being called out. Turning around she saw Richard waving her into the office.

"Come in Payson," he said, holding the door open for her. She felt like she was being called into the principled office. As she spotted Sasha, Austin and the two other assistant coaches it felt almost suffocating. Looking through the glass wall she saw the girls and boys training hard, spotting each other on the apparatus as their coaches were all squeezed into the office.

"What's going on?" she asked, sitting down on the chair Richard held out for her.

"We're going through the gymnast's routine for the annual Thanksgiving meet," Richard started, but before he could continue Payson straightened up in the chair.

"Thanksgiving meet?" she asked. "This weekend?"

"Oh, nobody told you?" Richard asked. "I hope you're not going away for the holiday. It's the last chance for the gymnasts to have their routines judged before Junior Nationals in just under two weeks."

"Oh, that's a good opportunity," Payson said. Turned out it was a good thing they didn't have any plans at all for the coming weekend. "We'll be here."

"Fantastic, we just wanted to know if Becca's floor routine will be done for the meet."

"I... I'm not sure," Payson said, feeling silly for not knowing. They had worked on it for weeks, and the routine itself was finished, now Becca only needed to perfect it.

"I'll help them," Sasha said, speaking up for the first time. "I can stay behind after hours. I think Becca need that routine to be sure to go to Junior worlds."

"It's decided then!" Richard said, sounding happy.

Payson rose. "I'll get Becca over to the floor at once."

Her sister was over at the vault, Payson let her finish the last vault and then waved her over to the floor in the back of the gym. Becca came running over with her water bottle in her hand.

"Did you forget to tell me about the Thanksgiving meet?" she asked, suddenly feeling very much like their mother.

"Oh, I might have, sorry," Becca said with a shrug. "Do you think I can do my floor routine?"

Payson told her sister what the coaches had said and Becca seemed happy with the decision. They got working on the routine at once.

"This brings back memories," Sasha said as the music died out and Becca came to a stop on the floor. Around them the gym was quiet and empty. It certainly woke memories to life.

"So, what do you think?" Becca asked, coming running over to them. After a full day of training, she seemed to have buckets of energy left. Payson barely remembered the feeling herself. She watched Sasha and Becca going into the details of the floor routine, her mind wandering back in time. It was difficult to understand how it had already passed five years since she had been the one out on that floor. It was such a long time, but also, no time at all.

The three of them worked together in the empty gym for an hour before they could all see that Becca had run out of energy. Payson and Becca was heading over to Kelly and Austin for an early Thanksgiving dinner, so Becca headed over to the changing room to shower and change.

The silence quickly grew uncomfortable and Payson found herself walking in slow circles on the springy floor. She felt like doing some tricks, but she hadn't even done a handstand in the five years since the Olympics. She had quit cold turkey.

"Do you ever train?" Sasha asked as if reading her mind.

Payson shook her head. "I run some, and do different classes at gyms." She fell silent.

"Don't you miss it?"

She looked up at her former coach. She didn't really know how to act around him any more. Was she supposed to behave like before? Like when he was her coach? Or like they were now equals? Or she the gym-sister and he her sister's coach? Like he was the man she owed so much she would never be able to repay him?

When she hesitated he locked eyes with her. "I'm trying to be your friend Pay, I miss it."

His blue eyes looked honest. Did he miss The Rock and being the best gym in the country, or did he miss her? Without knowing the answer, she decided to be honest anyway.

"Sometimes I miss it, gymnastics. But mostly I miss simpler times. It was all about the Olympics. No decisions, no taking care of anyone but me. It was me and gymnastics. I can miss that." she confessed.

"Everyone miss simpler times Pay, it's part of growing up."

Payson nodded slowly, she guessed he was right. She looked away from him. To erase the picture of his blue eyes that was all she could see, she kicked of the floor and went up into handstand. It might not feel like before, but she could at least do it.

"You're not flexing your feet," Sasha said, and suddenly she could feel his hands on her ankles. The electricity between them were still there, just like she remembered. When their skin came in contact with each other her heart skipped a beat. He let go and she stood back up. His smile looked like it always had done and made her breath hitch.

She understood the awkwardness now. The difficulty to face him, not knowing how to treat him. It was so clear she felt stupid. She had always assumed her crush would disappear with time, she even thought it had. Now she knew better. It had been laying dormant, like an inactive virus. Because as she looked up at him. The man with the british accent, the blue eyes, the short blond hair and stubble on his face. She knew, she was still crushing on him. She was still in love with him.

A/N: Thank you all so much for all the reviews, you have no idea how much it means to me. I hope this chapter, at least somewhat, explains Payson's behavior. I believe that if you're feeling very strong negative feelings/emotions (sorrow, guilt) it makes it difficult to feel anything else. But now she's figured it out. It wont all be sunshine from now on, but it's moving in the right direction.

Tomorrow I'm going on a short vacation. My younger brother is graduating high school and I won't be back home until Sunday. I wont be able to post any chapters because I'm only bringing my iPad (haven't figured out how to post from my iPad). I'll be focusing on writing instead. Hopefully I'll have the next chapter up soon after I come home.


	8. Chapter 8

"Payson? Are you ready? We need to leave!"

If Payson hadn't known how nervous her sister was, she would have fallen of the chair. It was the last day of practice before competition. The gymnasts had Thursday off and then the competition took place on Friday.

Payson was sitting at the new kitchen table, enjoying surfing the net as she finished her morning coffee. Becca opened the fridge, took a couple of bananas and an energy bar before closing it again. And so she was ready to leave.

"We're in plenty of time Becca," Payson said with a smile. But she knew how it felt, to want to be early to practice and your company being annoyingly slow. So instead of making fun of her sister, she got up and poured the last of the coffee into a travel mug.

"Okay, let's go," she said, packing the iPad in her purse.

The floor routine was all done, and Becca performed it very well during practice. It might not be perfect at the meet on Friday, but it would be for Junior Nationals in one and a half week. Her other routines were beautiful, but Sasha had told Payson he wanted the beam routine re-designed to match the new floor routine in time for Junior Worlds. But he hadn't told Becca that yet so Payson hadn't either.

Payson spent the morning sitting in the parents viewing area. For the first time since she put her foot in the gym it was empty, except for her. She guessed people were preparing for Thanksgiving. She spent the time reading an old anatomy and physiology text book. She hadn't really forgotten things, but it was good to straighten up her memory. She was still waiting for the official go ahead, but the dean had sent her an email saying things looked good.

"Payson!" she looked up from the book and Becca was waving for her. It was four o'clock, most of the gymnasts would start heading out soon. She put the book away and went down the stairs and across the gym to her sister, Sasha and Richard.

They had saved Becca for last, knowing she would stay late. Having gone through every gymnasts every routine one after an other, the turn was now Becca's. Payson kept in the background as her sister performed on vault, beam and uneven bars. Those routines wasn't completely new, so she had them down to perfection. The floor routine looked good, really good. Payson knew her sister was a performer, especially when it came to dancing, she wasn't worried her sister wouldn't bring the last bit of emotion to it at competition.

"Let's see that pirouette part one more time," Sasha said.

Becca did as told. There was a slight wobble that Payson didn't see until Sasha pointed it out.

"Do you have a camera in your phone?" Richard asked. "Small things like this I have found it's easier to show the gymnasts instead of just explaining."

Payson had wondered why her iPad had a camera. It wasn't like you walked around taking pictures with it, but for this it was perfect. They reset the music and Becca did the routine again as Payson filmed her sister.

"Great," Sasha said. "Come here Becca, we'll show you what we meant." Payson found the right spot in the video and showed Becca the wobble. "If you just remember to really work your core, you'll be straight as a stick."

Becca nodded and went out on the floor, trying again.

"I like that thing," Richard said, pointing at the iPad in Payson's hand.

After a few tries Becca had the move. It was a far more difficult pirouette than most gymnasts used in the floor routines, and it would give Becca good scores.

By the time they were finished, the gym was empty. Even Richard and the assistant coaches had waved good bye. Payson and Sasha was sitting on the steps to the office, watching Becca doing her stretching across the gym.

"So, what are you doing tomorrow?" Sasha asked, breaking the not too uncomfortable silence.

"Don't remind me about tomorrow," Payson sighed. She has no idea what they were doing for Thanksgiving. Kelly had invited them to come with them to Austin's parents, but neither Payson nor Becca could stand the thought of celebrating Thanksgiving.

"I was going to eat take out and watch crappy movies, you're welcome to join me if you want."

Payson looked over at her former coach. It was such a bad idea. Her plan had been to avoid him until her feelings were back in remission.

"I'll talk with Becca," she said.

.:.

And that's why Payson and Becca at lunch time on Thanksgiving took the subway only two stations north and found themselves on Sasha's doorstep. They had a bowl of fruit salad and ice cream with them and tried not to dwell on the fact that it was their first Thanksgiving without their parents.

Payson knocked on the door and it took no more than a few seconds for Sasha to open and let them in.

The apartment they stepped into surprised them both. It was nicely decorated, not rushed like their own. The living room was bright, had one wall covered with bookshelves full of books, and a few photos.

"How did you have time to move in and put everything in order?" Payson asked, walking along the bookshelves and reading the titles. In their apartment most things were still in boxes, including her books. It had been more fun to spend time at the gym, or in central park, or shopping, in stead of being in the apartment to unpack and clean.

"I've had this apartment for years," Sasha said with a shrug.

"That's cheating," Becca said, as if she had read Payson's mind.

Sasha ignored them both and showed them into the living room to watch the first movie.

.:.

As the credits started rolling Payson got up from the sofa and stretched her back. Sitting on too soft couches wasn't the best thing for her back any more.

"You okay?" Sasha asked as Becca practically ran over to the bathroom to, as she shouted over her shoulder, empty her bladder.

"Yeah, fine," Payson said and stopped the stretching. Instead she walked over to the bookshelves again. There were a few photos as well. There was one off a young Sasha, maybe 10 years old, with a man Payson recognized as his father and a woman who must have been his mother. They had the same eyes. There were also a photo of Sasha with a gold medal around his neck, standing next to Nicolai. Payson recognized it from his book. Both photos caught her interest, but what she stopped and picked up was a medal laying on the window sill. She picked up the thick gold medal with purple band. It was her All Around Olympic gold from London. She smiled, remembering how she had sneaked out to his hotel room on the evening of the All Around to give him the medal.

_The hallway was empty, as it should be in the Olympic Village when it's past midnight. Feeling nervous she hurried on her steps, to not loose the courage she had finally gathered. Knocking on his door, she kept looking around, making sure nobody saw her. She wasn't really doing anything wrong, except that it was past midnight. But with all the stupid rumors, which had increased when media realized Sasha came with the American National Team to the Olympics, it was stupid to let people see her sneaking over to his room at night. _

_Opening the door Sasha didn't look happy. But Payson couldn't help smiling. His hair was a mess, but the best thing was that he was dressed in sweatpants, and only sweatpants. _

"_Do you know what time..." he fell silent when he saw that it was her. She briefly wondered who he had thought she was. "Payson, what are you doing here? Is everything okay?" he stepped aside and let her inside the room. _

_The bed was unmade and he had clothes everywhere. Not finding anywhere to sit, she remained standing. _

"_We had a deal..." she said, taking out his Olympic gold. It looked a bit more ragged than when she first got it from him. She'd had it in her gym bag every day since the first day at TC. _

"_We had," he said, nodding as he reached down and picked up a shirt from the floor. He pulled it over his head. It made it easier for her to focus, not looking at his muscular chest as he spoke. "You've come to earn up to it?" _

"_Not really," she said. Instead of giving him his gold, she took her own All Around medal out of her pocket. She handed it to her coach. _

"_What's this?" he asked, looking at it._

"_I've gotten quite attached to yours," Payson said, looking down at the old gold, tracing it with her finger and suddenly feeling very insecure. "I'll give you mine in exchange for yours?" she blurted it out before loosing her nerve. _

"_Payson, you don't need to..." he started. _

"_I'll get more," she said, feeling confident about it. _

"Taking a trip down memory lane?"

Sasha's sudden voice behind her woke her from the dreams. She put the medal down and turned around. He held two wine glasses in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other.

"This time I am offering you wine," he said. "Do you want some? I just called in the order, the food will be here in half an hour."

"Sure," Payson said, walking over to the sofa and sitting down again. Becca came from the kitchen, holding a coke in one hand.

"Is it okay to drink soda the day before a competition?" she asked.

"One shouldn't matter one way or an other," Payson said and Sasha agreed.

Becca sat down on the chair. "Okay, next movie!"

.:.

Payson was woken when her back was aching worse than usual. Opening her eyes she realized she had fallen asleep curled up on Sasha's sofa. Straightening her back, she woke Sasha that was sleeping next to her.

"Wow, that was a bad movie," Sasha whispered.

Even Becca, who had chosen the movie, was asleep on the floor. Checking the time, Payson realized it was already eight o'clock and they should be getting home. The competition would start at nine the following day. She got up and took both hers and Becca's plates and carried them to the kitchen. Sasha followed her.

"Thanks for inviting us today," Payson said and leaned against the kitchen counter. She had almost forgotten it was Thanksgiving. "Becca really needed this," she hesitated before looking him in the eyes. "I really needed this." she added.

"I did too," Sasha smiled.

"Do you like New York?" she asked, feeling guilty as she more or less forced him here. "How come you had this apartment?"

"I studied at NYU for a couple of years after I blew out my knee. I kept the apartment because it's good to have one here," he said with a shrug.

"But do you like it here?" she pressed. Suddenly she just desperately needed to know if she was ruining his life.

Sasha took a step closer to her, and he reached toward her face. His fingers gently pushed her hair out of her face before he dropped the hand to his side. "Don't worry about me Payson," he said, small smile on his lips. "I'm right where I'm supposed to be."

"God what an awful movie!" Becca said so suddenly from the doorway that Payson jumped. "I fell asleep. Did you see it all?"

"No, we gave up," Sasha said, turning to the fridge. "Do you want to take some takeout with you home?"

"We're fine," Payson said. "We're not the one with only cereals and milk in the kitchen."

He laughed. "Do you want a ride home?"

"We're fine," Payson repeated. "It'll be faster to take the subway home."

.:.

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the annual Thanksgiving meet between The City Gym and North New Jersey Elite. Each gym is presenting two teams here today. A team gold, an All Around gold and four event golds will be handed out after hours of though competitions. Here are the teams!"

Payson watched her sister entering the floor with her team. She was the only junior competing with the top-ranked team. Both New York and New Jersey were top ranked gyms, so the meet was attracting media. On the way inside, Payson had talked to three different magazines and news stations. Media had been calm around her for a while, or since her parents accident. Before that they always showed up a few times a month, reporting on any news, taking pictures of her with her friends, and over all just being annoying. She had thought that after the post Olympic media circus, they would loose interest in her, but they hadn't. And now it seemed to be brought alive again.

"Next on the uneven bars, Becca Keeler from The City Gym!"

Payson was sitting on the edge of her chair as her sister saluted the judges. As Becca's hands found the lower bar, Payson held her breath. She had never thought it would be so tough sitting on the bleachers. Even sitting in the parents viewing area during training wasn't as difficult as to sit amongst the spectators during a competition. Not until Becca landed safely on two feet after the dismount, did she breath again.

Watching the teams rotate, her phone vibrated in her purse. It was a text from Kelly. _How's B doing? Are you breathing at all?_ Payson couldn't help smiling at how well her friend knew her. _Going well, she's second on UB this far. I'm breathing just fine, tnx._

Even though she was trying to completely focus on Becca, as her sister was warming up for the floor exercises, her glance moved to Sasha. He was walking the other team toward the vault, dressed in the team blue and white jacket. He looked just as focused as she remembered him and it made her smile. She had never missed gymnastics, not in the way that she wanted to go back training, but in that moment, watching Sasha on the floor, she missed being there with him. She missed how they used to communicate without words, how he used to look at her routines.

Her thoughts was pulled back to reality as Becca's name was announced. Watching her sister perform the new floor routine was heart wrenching, and until she saw it from far away, and her sister putting all the emotion she had in it, she saw it for what it was. It was their try to move on. It was hard to miss now, and she wondered how many around her saw the same. Becca finished the last pirouette and fell to her knees and Payson felt a tear escape. It was the most beautiful routine she had ever seen, and yet it wasn't perfect. She looked over at Sasha across the gym, he was looking at her and their eyes locked. They might not have communicated for years, but she understood his look as if he had whispered in her ear. He understood. He would help her sister to perfect it. Emotions she didn't want to unleash threatened to burst out, so she looked away. Her sister looked completely unaffected.

.:.

"The winner of the All Around is... Jenifer Stone, The City Gym!" Payson clapped her hands with the rest of the audience. It wasn't a surprise, Jenifer had been the only American girl to medal at the Olympics in Rio last year, and after most of the Olympic team had retired, she was undoubtedly the best gymnast in the country. "Second place is... Rachel Moore, North New Jersey Elite. And third place goes to the only junior amongst the top five; Becca Keeler!"

Payson almost spilled the water from the bottle she had just opened, as she got on her feet to cheer for her sister. Becca's smile could rival the sun just as Payson's tears could the rain. She watched her sister get the medal before running to her coaches, hugging them both. Before the price ceremony was over, Becca received a silver medal for her floor routine and a bronze for her uneven bars. It was by far Becca's best placement in company like this.

People left the gym rather quickly, probably to get back to their family weekends. Payson remained sitting on the steps to the office, waiting when one after another, the gymnasts left the changing room. Half an hour after the competition ended, it was probably only Becca left.

"Payson," Sasha came around the corner in a fast pace. "Becca's crying in the changing room..."

In five seconds Payson was by her sisters side, pulling the smaller blonde into a hug. "What's wrong Beccs?" she whispered.

"I miss mom and dad," she sobbed. "They should be here!"

Payson's heart broke in a million pieces and she didn't know how to console her sister, because she agreed. Their parents should be here to see Becca perform. "I know," she whispered, tightening the embrace. "I know Becca."

It was the first time Becca cried openly after those initial days, and the funeral of course. Payson didn't know how she could help her sister. She couldn't say it got better or that it all had some kind of meaning. Because of course it didn't. So instead of empty words, all she could offer her sister was somebody to cry with.

.:.

As the Keeler sisters calmed down and dried their tears, Sasha offered to drive them home. An offer they accepted. Payson didn't feel any desire to walk to the subway with red and puffy eyes. Outside the gym media was waiting. Sasha put one arm around Becca and one around Payson and they walked together in a fast pace to his car. Payson ducked her head and ignored the question shouted at them and soon they were in the car.

"Just keep looking down Becca," Sasha said as he backed out and drove out of the parking lot.

"Why did they want our picture?" Becca asked and Payson couldn't help smiling at the nativity. Because even if some questions had been directed to Payson herself, most had been shouted after her sister.

"You did very well today Becca," Sasha said. "The media always try to make money out of popular and good athletes."

When they stopped at a stoplight, Sasha turned to Payson. "If you want to go down that route, you probably should find her an agent. Soon."

Payson once again felt overwhelmed. The feeling of overwhelm was one she was well familiar with by now. It visited her at least once a day. This had not happened to her when she was 14. How was things moving so fast for Becca? How could Payson help her sister?

"Do you wanna come up for dinner?" Payson asked as Sasha parked the car outside their apartment building. They could need the distraction so the apartment didn't fall quiet so soon. And Payson really didn't want him to leave, however bad that was.

"Sure," Sasha said. "We should celebrate the win."

In the review mirror she could see Becca smile a little. "Of course we will," Payson said. "Becca, you decide on the food."

"Pancakes," Becca quickly said. "I want pancakes."

"For dinner?" Payson asked but as she saw Becca smile and nod she didn't question it any more. Why not pancakes for dinner?

.:.

"Do you want some tea?" Payson asked as they finished cleaning up in the kitchen. She had told him he didn't need to help, but of course he had anyway.

"Yes please," he said.

They were alone in the kitchen, Becca was in her room, on the phone. The silence between them was, for the first time in a while, comfortable.

"Are you coming with Becca to Houston next weekend?" Sasha asked as they were waiting for the water to boil.

"I don't know," Payson said looking through the window on the wet street outside. "I'll ask her what she want," she said. After the melt down earlier that day, she didn't really want to leave her sister to fend for herself, but Becca hadn't let anything slip if she wanted Payson to come or not.

"You're doing a good job with her," Sasha said. "I think your parents would be proud."

"I don't know..." Payson said, truly feeling unsure. She couldn't help think about every mistake she had made that far.

"I do know," Sasha said, walking closer to her. "She's lucky to have you, when my mom died... It was hard, being alone, even if I had dad."

She had forgotten that he had lost his mother when he was young. She couldn't imagine going through it alone.

"Don't over think everything, Pay," he whispered and pulled her into a hug. She relaxed in his arms, breathing in the smell of which was Sasha.

"Thank you for being here," she whispered, not remembering if she had told him before. She looked up at him. His blue eyes were hypnotizing and she simply couldn't look away.

_Knock, knock. _

They jumped apart and Payson hurried to the door, she almost felt like straightening her clothes or brush her fingers through her hair. But they hadn't done anything wrong. With a last, quick, look at Sasha, she opened the door.

"Surprise!" Kelly and Austin shouted, both throwing their arms around Payson. Payson let her friends inside.

"What are you doing here?" Payson asked. They were supposed to visit Austin's parents the entire weekend.

"We had to bale, just couldn't handle the relatives," Austin trailed off in the end. "Oh, hi Sasha," he said looking over Payson's head.

"We were just making tea, do you want some?" Sasha asked.

"I could kill for a cup of tea. This pregnancy thing makes me so nauseous, and after a day in the car? Not feeling good!" she said, a hand on her still flat stomach. She was in week 15 and wasn't showing in the slightest.

"Kelly! Austin!" Becca suddenly squealed from the door to her room.

.:.

Thanksgiving weekend ended up being not at all as bad as Payson had feared it would be. Very much thanks to their friends who seemed to be on Keeler sisters watch the whole time. Even though the long weekend had run smoothly, Payson felt relived as she woke up on Monday morning. Their first holiday had passed without major breakdowns.

"Becca, it's six am. I'm going for a run!" Payson called as she stepped out of her room dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie. Running in the mornings was a thing she had quit doing ages ago, but she felt restless, and didn't want to have to sit around the apartment for an hour and a half doing nothing.

"Hang on!" Becca called, asking Payson stop right before turning the door knob. "I'll come with you!"

Payson smiled a little, she guessed the bronze All Around medal a couple of days earlier hadn't helped calm her sister to calm down. This part of life, of sports, she could help Becca with. Training had always helped keeping Payson herself focused, she could teach her younger sister the same way of handling the nerves.

The same morning, as Payson spent time it the bookstore Austin had showed her a few weeks ago, she finally got the call she had been waiting for. She ducked behind a book shelf and took the call from the dean of admission.

"Payson Keeler speaking," she answered, fingering at the cooking books in the shelf as she tried to keep the butterflies in her stomach in place. This was it, her future was decided.

"Hello miss Keeler, this is professor Fitzgerald, dean of admission at NUY," he said. "I just wanted to let you know I've looked through your case. Since we're in the middle of the year, we don't have any other choice than placing you in the first year class. Which means you'll have to retake one semester. You can, if you wish, wait until the fall, and start year two then, but it'll be the same class."

"That's fine, I don't mind retaking a term," she said. It would give her time to get back into studying. Even if she had only been away from it a few months, it felt far more. And she needed a routine, something to do, meet people, make friends. She needed a life again. So what if she had to retake a couple of courses, she had passed them once and shouldn't have a problem doing it again.

"Fantastic," professor Fitzgerald said, it sounded like he was writing on a keyboard in the background. "I'll send the information home to you. Good luck with the classes."

"Thank you so much professor Fitzgerald," Payson said and they ended the call.

She payed for the books she had picked up and headed back to the apartment. She would finally be forced to unpack all her books. She better start studying at once if she wanted to fit into the class. She needed to focus on the unpacking instead of starting to think too much about the class she would be joining. She had so many questions and wonders. Would she make friends? Would she keep up? Would it be harder or easier then classes in LA? The excitement was bubbling inside her and she was dancing around her room as she unpacked the boxes of books which had been untouched since she left LA for Boulder now four months ago.

"I'm starving! I need food!" Becca shouted as soon as she was inside the door the same afternoon.

Payson was sitting on the floor of her room, four different text books open around her. She looked up like awaken from a dream as she heard Becca's voice. Walking out of her room and into the kitchen she saw Becca looking through the fridge.

"We don't have any food!" she groaned and closed the fridge door with a dramatic sigh.

Payson walked over to the fridge, feeling sure her sister was exaggerating. But as she looked through both the fridge and the cupboard she realized Becca was right.

"Well, we'll order something. What do you want?" Payson asked, putting her books away. She certainly didn't had the domestic side of things down yet.

After ordering sushi for dinner they sat down in the sofa. Payson pulled a blanket around herself while Becca put on a sweatshirt. Their apartment wasn't freezing, but after a long they it always felt a bit chilly.

"So, they called from NYU today," Payson said as her sister was trying to find something to watch on the newly bought tv.

"What did they say?" Becca asked, turning the tv off.

"I'm starting in January," Payson smiled.

Becca squealed and jumped up and hugged Payson. "That's great!" she said. "Now you don't need to just sit around the gym all day."

"It hasn't been that bad Becca," Payson said. It might not have been the most productive time of her life, but she hadn't hated it.

"Yeah, but I know you're supposed to do more than just sit around watching me. I'm happy for you."

Payson hugged her sister again. She was happy for herself too. Becca was right, she was supposed to do more with her life than being a gym-sister. She was pretty sure she had figured out what it was, studying earlier that day she had realized she was doing the right thing, going back to school.

.:.

The days moved on slowly and Becca got more and more nervous. On Wednesday evening Payson basically had to force her sister to eat dinner after practice. They were flying down to Houston, Texas on the following afternoon, after half a practice in the morning. Qualifications was on Friday, event finals on Saturday and All Around final on Sunday. Richard had let Payson know he thought Becca would have a very busy weekend. Apparently he thought Becca could qualify for all the finals. It was more common in Junior Nationals than regular Nationals that somebody qualified in every final, but it was still no more than maybe two gymnasts a year performing on that level. Payson herself had been in all finals, but not medaled on beam.

"Becca, you really should eat something more," Payson said, looking at Becca's half eaten plate. "Is there something else you want? We can head down to the supermarket? Maybe some chocolate?"

"No thanks," Becca sighed. "Wouldn't say no to a cup of tea though."

Payson almost flew up to make tea for them. She didn't come very far in the process though because her phone started vibrating on the counter. Kelly's name and face blinked on the screen.

"She's probably calling to check on you," Payson smiled and reached for the phone. "What's up Kel?" she answered, turning back to filling the kettle with water.

"No it's me," Austin said on the other end. He sounded out of breath. Payson turned the water off.

"Hey Austin," she said, feeling a little uneasy. "What's going on?"

"It's Kelly," he whispered.

Payson felt her knees buckle and a loud bang told her she had dropped the kettle. "What's wrong Austin?" she asked. Her sister was next to her as soon as she had uttered the words.

"She got a terrible stomach ache, them she just passed out. They took her into surgery just now. They haven't told me much. Pay, she looked really pale..."

"We'll be there as soon as we can," she said, heading into her bedroom to change out of her pj pants, motioning for Becca to do the same. "Do you need anything?" she asked her best friend of six years.

"I need Kelly," he whispered with broken voice.

A/N: Sorry for ending it here. What do you think should happen? What do you think is wrong with Kelly? Let me know what you thought about the chapter.

I'll have family visiting all week, but I'll try have an other chapter up before the weekend.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: I want to thank you all for your encouraging words. Even though I've written several fanfics before, I've never posted them, because I thought 1) no one would like it, and 2) I would lose my motivation to keep writing and posting. With all your reviews, favorite and story alert adds, I've written more than ever and I already have the next few chapters written (need to be edited of course). It shouldn't be a problem finishing this story at all.

.:.

Payson and Becca ran through several long corridors, making more wrong than right turns before they finally found the way to the ward Austin had described. In an almost empty waiting room they found Austin pacing back and fourth. He hugged them tightly as soon as they turned the corner.

"Have you heard anything?" Payson asked and sat down in one of the terribly hard plastic chairs. Austin sat down next to her, but didn't stop bouncing his leg.

"The only thing I know is that the surgery is supposed to take two hours," he looked at the watch around his wrist. "It's been one now..."

"Do you want something?" Becca asked, she was still standing, twisting her hands and nervously looking around.

"Do you want to get us coffee?" Payson asked, knowing her sister would feel better when she had something to do. "We need to be awake and alert when we can see Kelly."

Becca nodded and quickly disappeared the way they had come.

"Oh no, I'm so stupid, do you hate hospitals?" Austin asked, he was on his feet again. "You can leave if you want."

Payson took her friends hand between hers and pulled him down again. "Don't be silly," she said. "We want to be here for you and Kelly."

Of course hospitals weren't fun, they had spent hours in a waiting room like this to hear anything about their dad. Kim had been killed during impact, but Mark had been brought to the hospital for extensive surgery. Payson'd had the time to fly from LA to Boulder, and still had to wait for the surgery to finish. Becca had been in the waiting room alone for hours before she arrived, she understood that her sister had a hard time coming back to a hospital.

"What did they say about Kelly? Was it the baby?" Payson shivered at the thought of her friend being cut open on a table somewhere in the hospital.

"They took her straight to surgery, the only thing they said was that it could be a lot of different things, and that they are prioritizing Kelly's health over the baby."

Payson nodded. Kelly was in her 15 or 16th week of the pregnancy. Payson would be devastated if her friends lost their baby, but she would not survive if Kelly didn't pull through this. She took a few deep breaths, positive thoughts, positive thoughts, positive thoughts. This wasn't like with their dad, Kelly would be fine.

When Becca came back, handing out the coffee, Payson leaned over and took her sisters hand.

"Do you want me to call Sasha?" she whispered. "You can stay with him for the night?"

Becca shook her head. "I'm fine," she whispered back, but she didn't let go of Payson's hand.

_Payson stared at the wall across the room. She had memorized the pattern an hour ago. Next to her sat her tiny sister, knees pulled close to her chest, tears silently rolling down her cheeks. All Payson could do was to focus on her own breathing. Breathing in, breathing out, repeat. _

_"Mark Keeler's family?" _

_Payson and Becca stood. Payson couldn't look down at her sister, she focused on a spot on the wall behind the doctor. _

_"Your father suffered from several different injuries. He was bleeding both in his abdomen and his brain..." The words coming from the doctors mouth didn't make any sense at all for Payson. Nonsense words, that depending on the order, could mean anything. But the last words the doctors uttered, with a hand on Payson's shoulder, was impossible to not understand. "I'm sorry, but we couldn't save him." _

_The world was spinning. She felt her knees buckle and her hands suddenly scraping against the floor. She couldn't breath. This wasn't happening, this was a bad dream. She wanted to wake up. _

_"Is there anyone we can call?" _

_Payson shook her head, still not able to breath. "There's no one else," she finally got out, and with the words came the sobs. She reached for her sister who was sitting on the floor next to her, and pulled her into a hug. There were no one else, they were on their own. _

Time moved slowly, and Payson spent the time watching the clock across the waiting room. Every time someone walked by, they all straightened up. But people kept passing by and they would slump back in the hard plastic chairs again. No waiting room had probably looked as bad as the one they were sitting in. The white walls and orange plastic chairs, together with the harsh light, made it hurtful to the eyes to just be in the room.

"Kelly Parker's family?" a woman dressed in green scrubs suddenly asked from the doorway.

They all stood at once and she walked over to them. Payson reached out and grabbed both her sister's and Austin's hands. "In surgery we discovered that Miss Parker had several cysts on her right fallopian tube. This isn't uncommon amongst women. But what had happened in Miss Parker's case was that one ruptured, causing the intense pain and her passing out. During surgery we could remove the cysts, and a part of the fallopian tube that was damaged." Payson knew all the words, but she couldn't put it all together, she was nodding anyway. "We expect Miss Parker to do a full recovery. When it comes to the baby we'll have to do a few checkups in the next couple of days. But it's looking promising."

"She'll be fine?" Austin asked. "Kelly will be fine?"

"A couple of days here for observation, and then a few calm weeks at home and she'll be back to normal."

"Thank you so much doctor," Payson said when Austin didn't seem to be able to talk. "When can we see her?"

"She's at post-op observation now, she'll be up in an hour. It's past visiting hours now, but we can make an exception. If you want to get something to eat you should do it now. One or two hours and she'll be up."

When the doctor had left, Payson turned and pulled a crying Austin into her arms. "She's fine Austin," she whispered. "It'll be okay." Becca found her way into the hug and Payson could feel the sobs leaving her sisters body.

It took several minutes before they could calm down and dry their tears. It was nine thirty by then and they all agreed they couldn't spend an other minute in the waiting room. The cafeteria was closed, but they found a vending machine on the bottom floor close to the main entrance.

"Do you want to leave?" Austin asked, taking a bite from a chocolate bar. "It's getting late."

It wasn't until then Payson remembered the competition the coming weekend. They were flying down to Houston in less than 24 hours. She really didn't want to leave Kelly, but it was an important weekend for Becca.

"Do you want to go home?" Payson asked her sister. "We haven't packed or anything."

"Can't we see Kelly first?" Becca asked.

Payson nodded. "Of course," she said and handed her sister a bag of chips.

Even if the two hours of waiting for Kelly to get back to her room felt long, it wasn't anything compared to the hours of surgery. It was at eleven thirty that a nurse came and got them and showed them to Kelly's room. They received orders to keeping it short. Tiptoeing into the room Kelly turned and looked over at them. It was the best thing Payson had ever seen. Austin was quickly over at the bed, hugging her for a long time before Payson and Becca got a chance to do the same.

"You scared us so much," Payson whispered as she hugged her best friend.

"I'm so worried about the baby, Pay." Kelly whispered.

"As long as you take care of yourself, everything will be okay Kelly."

Kelly nodded and Payson helped her to dry a few escaped tears.

"Do you need anything? Painkillers? Water?" Austin asked as he saw the tears, jumping up from the chair he had been sitting on.

"I need to hug Becca, come here," she said, reaching out for the tiny blond. "What are you doing here? You need to prepare for the competition!"

Kelly whispered something that Payson couldn't hear, but Becca was nodding. They held each other for minute before letting go.

"It's late, you shouldn't take the subway by your self," Kelly said, fumbling with her phone to check the time. "Austin, maybe you can go with them?"

Austin looked hesitant, and Payson knew he didn't want to leave Kelly, but at the same time didn't want to let them down either.

"You stay Austin," Payson said, digging her phone out of her purse. "I'll call someone to pick us up."

She stepped out of the room, closing it behind her before dialing the number she had already learned by heart.

"Payson? Is everything okay?" he answered on the third ring. She realized it was past midnight as she could hear the sleepy panic in his voice.

She felt so... cheap. Always coming running when she needed help, no thought about him. She watched the ceiling to try keeping the tears at bay. "Everything is fine, Becca and I are at the hospital..."

"What? Are you okay? Is it Becca?"

"Kelly had a complication with the pregnancy," Payson said, taking a deep breath. "She was in surgery but she's fine now. Me and Becca were going to take the subway home but..."

"No way, it's too late for you to be out now, I'll come pick you up. I'll call when I'm there."

"Thank you Sasha," Payson breathed. She was never going to stop owing him.

Stepping inside the hospital room again, Kelly was sleeping and Becca and Austin was sitting on the only two chairs in the room. Becca looked tired, but relived.

"He's coming?" Austin whispered and Payson nodded. "Good."

Payson squeezed down beside Becca on the chair. She was starting to feel the tiredness too, and of course the relief of Kelly being fine. She knew that it was very few women who died because of complications during pregnancies in their part of the world, but it did still happen. And with the "bad luck" they'd had lately? Payson didn't even want to think about it.

She closed her eyes for a couple of seconds, and the next thing she know her phone is vibrating in her hand.

"We'll be right out," she whispered as Sasha told her he was waiting outside the hospital.

"Austin," she gently bumped his shoulder and he opened his eyes. "We're heading home," she whispered. "We'll be back tomorrow before we leave." They hugged and she turned and woke Becca up. Leaving the room they closed the door carefully to not wake Kelly up.

"Do you think she'll be fine, like the doctor said?" Becca asked as they walked through the empty corridors.

"Sure she will. You know Kelly," Payson said.

Outside the hospital Sasha was waiting as promised. He was leaning against the car. As he saw them he got up and hugged them both.

"How's Kelly?" he asked, opening the car doors for them.

"She'll be fine, probably the baby as well."

.:.

The following morning the alarm on Payson's phone went of at five. They had barely slept anything, but were forced to get up. Training would start at eight as usual, end at lunch and the flight was leaving at three pm. Which meant that if they wanted to visit Kelly in the hospital, they would need to finish packing before leaving for the gym.

"Becca, are you up?" Payson asked on the way to the kitchen to start making coffee.

"I'm packing!" Becca called back.

Poor girl, Payson thought, she probably hadn't slept at all. Why did everything have to happen at once? It felt like, in the last few weeks, everything had happened in a million miles an hour. How were they supposed to keep up?

Payson pulled out her carry on suitcase from her wardrobe. Even though both Richard, Sasha and one of the mothers, Mrs. Larsen, were going to Houston with the five junior girls who had qualified for Nationals, Payson had decided to go with Becca. Becca had said she was fine, but hadn't sounded very convincing, and after last weekend... Payson wanted to be there for her sister, like their parents would have.

"Do you think I need a dress?" Becca asked, popping her head into Payson's room.

"I have no idea," Payson said. She could barely remember her junior nationals. "Best to be prepared, I'll bring one."

Becca quickly disappeared again. "And don't forget a change of clothes for after practice," Payson called after her sister.

"Coffee is done Pay!" Becca called from the kitchen.

After filling a cup, she went back to packing. She used to be so good at this. Packing for meets, for camps or for PR weekends. It was a while ago though. And she didn't need ten different leo's and sweatpants now. Now she needed real clothes. Which was much harder to chose.

.:.

"Payson, do you and Becca need a ride to the airport?" Sasha asked as Payson waited for her sister to finish the stretching.

"We're heading by the hospital to see Kelly before we go," Payson said, once again checking the time. It was already eleven forty five, they were going to have to hurry if they wanted to make time for everything.

"I'll drive you," Sasha said.

Behind them the girls finally finished stretching and Becca came running over. "You sure? You don't need to?" Payson said. "We need to go home first."

"Of course, I'll just get my papers from the office. Two seconds."

After a quick stop at the apartment so Becca could shower and they could grab their bags, they drove to the hospital. They had exactly 20 minutes before they needed to be on the road again, so the trio hurried through the corridors. This time it was much easier to find their way.

"Kelly! How are you doing?"

Kelly was sitting up on the side of the bed as they entered the room. Austin was lying on the bed behind her, eating pudding, but he was quick to get up when he saw them coming.

Payson hugged her best friend. "Are you in much pain?"

"I've gotten some delicious pills," Kelly stage whispered.

"The only positive side of going through surgery," Sasha smiled, hugging Kelly.

"I'm still angry with you!" Kelly said, pointing as Sasha as they let go of each other.

"Why?" Sasha asked.

"I can't remember it now, but I'm sure I have a good reason."

"I am too," Sasha humored her. "I'm very sorry for whatever it was I did."

"And you," she pulled Becca in for a hug. "You go and win us some Olympic gold!"

"It's Nationals," Becca said, also smiling.

The conversation was starting to derail, so the trio said their goodbyes and hugged both Kelly and Austing again and promised to call from Houston. Before leaving, Austin let them know the first ultrasound looked very good. It made Payson breathe a bit easier as she knew Kelly was enjoying a high rather than turning in pains, and that the baby was doing well. Austin had said they counted on going home the follow day. And even if Kelly couldn't, he would be kicked out very soon. The nurses were grumpy over the whole no respect for the visiting hours thing.

"Do you want me to stay somewhere for lunch?" Sasha asked as he drove out of the hospital parking lot.

Payson looked at her sister through the review mirror. "Anything is fine with me, you Becca?"

"I can just grab something at the airport," Becca said.

"Straight to the airport it is," Sasha said.

.:.

The flight went well and they arrived at the hotel around dinner time. Payson got to share a hotel room with the chaperone, Mrs. Larsen. Only having time to drop their bags off before heading down to the restaurant on the ground floor, Payson barely had time to say one word to the woman until they were back in the room after ten. She had thought her days of sharing hotel rooms with strangers were over.

"So you're Hanna's mother?" Payson asked. "I think Becca has been hanging out with her during practice."

"Yes, Hanna has mentioned her, I think they get along well. I'm Grace by the way."

"Payson," Payson said, shaking hands with her new room mate. "How long has Hanna trained at The City Gym?"

Having kept out of the gossip at the gym, Payson hadn't talked much to any of the other parents yet. But after spending an hour with Grace she was all caught up on the gym gossip. It was kind of fun, and definitively relaxing.

"Well, I'm going to head down and get a cup of tea before bed," Payson said, pulling on a thick knitted cardigan.

"There's room service," Grace said, looking up from going through her suitcase.

"I don't mind the walk," Payson said and grabbed her purse before leaving the hotel room.

Entering the restaurant she spotted Richard and Sasha at one of the tables across the room by the windows. She ordered a cup of green tea and made her way over to her sister's coaches.

"Hi," she said. "Am I interrupting something?"

"Payson, of course not," Richard said with a big smile as always. "Sit down, sit down."

Payson sat down in the cosy chair, crossing her legs and leaning back. She was tired after the hectic night and day.

"Have you heard anything more from Austin and miss Parker?" Richard asked, finishing the last of the content in his cup.

"Kelly is fine, she's going home tomorrow," Payson said. She had spoken with her friend just before dinner and both the pain medicine high and the pain was better. "Which is probably for the best. She and Austin are both annoying the poor nurses to death."

Both Richard and Sasha laughed. "That's good to hear," Richard took his jacked, that had hung over the back of his chair, on and bottomed it. "I just wanted to tell you Payson that you did a great job with your sister's routine. If you want to do some coaching before you finish your physical therapy degree, there has already been parents asking for your help with their daughters," he stood. "Have fun kids, it's past my bedtime."

"You're going back to school?" Sasha asked as Richard walked out of the restaurant.

"I start at NYU in January," she said, she couldn't believe she had forgotten to tell Sasha about it. "Richard thinks I should start working at the gym, as a physical therapist that is, when I'm done with school," she shook her head.

"I think that's a great idea," Sasha smiled. "I'm happy for you, that you're going back to school."

"Thanks," Payson smiled.

They sat small talking until Payson started yawning. It was already midnight, and after the previous night she was getting tired. But she didn't want to end the evening. It felt kind of like before. They were talking about everything and anything and there were no awkwardness.

"I've missed this," Payson confessed after finishing her tea.

"Me too," Sasha said.

Together they took the elevator up to the fifth floor where they walked down to their rooms. He stopped her before she opened her door.

"Payson," he said. "I don't want you to think that I hate being back coaching."

"You don't?" she asked, feeling slightly hopeful.

He took her hands in his. "I've told you, I'm right where I'm supposed to. We can't always plan how life goes, you know that."

She knew that. But all she could think of was his hands, that were touching hers. She looked from their joined hands to his face, to his lips. She couldn't lean up, all she saw was him pushing her away in the gym so long time ago. Her heart was beating harder and faster than it had ever done before.

When he moved one hand up to touch her face, gently stroke her cheek with his thumb, she closed her eyes and leaned into the touch. She had dreamed about this for years.

"Look at me," he whispered.

And she looked up, into his blue eyes. She saw them coming closer, and then his lips touched hers. She melted into him, moving her hands to his hair. The kiss was slow and all consuming. His hand on her lower back made her shiver. This was exactly the kiss she had dreamed about.

"I'm sorry," he suddenly said as he broke away from her. "God, I'm sorry. I promised... I'm sorry." he turned and disappeared down the corridor, passed his room and down the stairs.

"What just happened?" Payson whispered out to the empty corridor.

.:.

A/N: it's always two steps forward, one step back with those two...

Kelly being sick and going into surgery is the thing I wrote about changing earlier. With all your comments on how you were looking forward to see Kelly and Austin as parents, I realized I was excited as well. I had written that it was an ectopic pregnancy and in the first draft Kelly lost the baby. So I changed it, because I can do that :) Do you think I did the right thing?

Next chapter will probably be up next week. Until then, let me know what you thought of chapter 9.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: I might sound like a broken record, but thank you so much for all your reviews. You have no idea how much they mean to me.

.:.

The flight back to New York City was as passive dramatic as only a flight full of gymnastics people could be. Most of the girls was celebrating a well performed competitions, but one was sulking because she missed out on the medal podium. Payson hadn't talked to Sasha since that strange moment their first night in Houston and Grace kept begging Payson to help her daughter with her floor routine. And a row in front of Payson, Becca tried to contain all excitement without exploding.

It was exhausting, and Payson never thought they would touch ground, but of course they did. And when they did, everyone was quick to say their good byes.

"Once again, congratulation on the medals, and the spot on the junior national team," Richard smiled and hugged an almost jumping Becca. "Do you have a ride home?" he asked, looking between the Keeler sisters.

"Austin is waiting for us," Payson said. "Thanks for this weekend."

They all said their good byes and scattered for the wind. Payson saw Sasha talking with Richard before leaving with just a quick glance in her direction. She sighed. Back to being awkward. It was like they had taken 5 years worth of steps backwards.

"Payson! Becca!" Austin called out and waved as they made their way through the arrival hall. "Congrats on the win Becca!" he said, hugging the girl so hard she dropped her suitcase.

"I only won floor," she said.

"A gold on floor, silver on uneven bars and vault, and on top of that a silver on the All Around and a spot on the Junior National team is a major achievement Becca, you should be proud." Austin said. "We need to celebrate properly as soon as Kelly is feeling better."

Payson thought she could see Becca's cheek redden and she couldn't help give her sister an one armed hug as they continued out to the car.

.:.

The following week was just as awkward as the rest of the weekend had been. Payson had avoided the gym and only been there a few hours to support her sister. Instead she spent a lot of time with Kelly in her apartment. Kelly was much better than the previous week, but she was still in pain more or less the whole time. With a 15 cm long scar on her stomach, it was understandable. Payson made sure to kick her friend up from the sofa for at least one outside walk a day. It went better and better, and on Friday Kelly had actually changed out of her PJ's before Payson arrived.

"Did something happen in Houston?" Kelly asked on Friday afternoon. They were waiting for Austin and Becca to get there. The plan was to all get ready together and then they were going out to eat at a fancy restaurant to celebrate Becca.

"What do you mean?" Payson asked.

"Don't play stupid Pay," Kelly groaned. "We've been avoiding this the whole week. Now just tell me what happened."

Kelly had always had the ability to see straight through people. That's why she had been so good at psyching people out at competitions and training. She had also been the first person to ask Payson if she was in love with Sasha. Apparently it was something about being devastated after he left for Romania which gave her away to the brunette. So at a national team practice, Kelly had just asked. Not in a teasing way, just simply asked. Payson couldn't answer at the time, but Kelly had still said she would protect her secret. When the picture of Sasha and Payson kissed resurfaced during their time at TC Kelly had helped her by saying to the media that if she, or any of the other girls, had gotten a chance they would have kissed the coach too. She helped making the kiss scandal into a joke.

And now Payson sat in the sofa, once again looking into Kelly's dark eyes, debating how much to tell her friend.

"Or don't tell me, you still have feelings for Sasha?" she asked.

"Don't look at me like that," Payson said, looking away from her friends sympathetic smile. "It's just temporarily, just memories really. I don't even know him," she said, more to herself than her friend.

"Sure you do," Kelly said. "And it's not like you're 17 year old and forbidden fruit any more. You can go for it."

"Well, that didn't end very well this weekend," she sighed.

Kelly's eyes widened slightly but she didn't have time ask any more questions.

"We're home!" Austin suddenly shouted and barged into the apartment.

"We never thought he would let us go," Becca sighed and sat down next to Payson in the sofa. "Sasha has been so grumpy all week!"

Kelly looked meaningly at Payson. "I wonder why?"

.:.

Saturday morning Payson realized she had to face her problems rather than to hide from them. So she got up early with her sister and together they took the subway to the gym. After just half an hour she understood what Becca had meant about grumpy. Sasha walked around, sulking, and pointed out small mistakes and made the girls redo their routines at once. Yet an other half hour later, she sighed and got up. This couldn't continue.

She headed downstairs and waited in the doorway until Sasha noticed her. She nodded her head, wanting him to follow her. After exchanging a few words with Richard, he did. They walked into the kitchen and Sasha poured them a cup of coffee each.

"Did Austin ask you to talk with me?" Sasha asked, making a face. It was clear he knew he was behaving like a child.

She laughed. Her friends had always pushed her to talk to Sasha when he had been in a bad mood. She was the only one who had gotten away with talking back to him. "No. I just..." she sighed. She hadn't exactly planned what to say to him. "I don't want things to be awkward between us. Can't we just pretend Friday never happen?"

"Sounds like a plan," Sasha said, nodding. "I'm sorry for my behavior that night, by the way."

"What night?" Payson smiled, maybe a little forced, but it was a smile.

"Right," Sasha smiled as well.

They drank their coffee in silence. Payson tried not to think too much about how willing Sasha was to forget Friday evening had ever happened. It was good, she guessed. She just wished it wasn't so easy for him to forget, not only the kiss, but the nice evening they had spent together. She added the question of who he had promised what, to the never ending mental pile of question she couldn't ask him out of fear of him simply shutting down and move away.

"I should get back up to the viewing area," Payson said. "I'm trying to catch up on my old text books." She didn't wait for his answer but jogged up the stairs. Sitting down behind the glass wall which divided the viewing are and the gym, she watched him walk out on the floor again. Why couldn't he just be honest with her? Open up and tell her what was wrong?

.:.

December is a depressing month when you don't know how or where you're celebrating the holidays. Or Payson knew she and Becca were celebrating New Years Eve at The City Gym's annual new years ball. It was also a retirement party for Richard. But Christmas? That was the real trouble. And they were constantly reminded of it coming closer. All decorations, Christmas songs, and everyone talking about their plans.

"You're welcome to celebrate Christmas with us," Kelly said for probably the forth time the same week. Kelly was back working, but from home. Payson had tried to convince Kelly to calm down and take some more time off from her company. But Kelly had always worked hard and she simply ignored Payson. She had however tried to convince Payson to celebrate Christmas with Kelly, Austin and Austin's family.

"It would feel weird," Payson said. "And Becca agrees, we're just going to eat take out or something."

"But that's depressing," Kelly said, making a face.

"Yeah well, our lives aren't very funny right now."

.:.

With one and a half week left until Christmas, Richard and the parents whining and convincing paid off. Payson felt more insecure than she had ever done before, when she stepped into the gym on Monday morning. Instead of heading upstairs, she walked into the coaches office where they had their daily morning meeting.

"Fantastic that you could come so early Payson," Richard said and motioned for her to sit down, he turned to the others. "Payson has agreed to help some of the girls with their routines."

"It's just until I go back to school," she clarified. Even sitting down she couldn't relax, she was twisting her hands in her lap and really regretted doing this. What could she do to help the girls anyway?

Richard ignored her. "Most of the girls just want your reassurance and the chance to ask questions about the Olympics, but they could all work on their routines."

Payson nodded, fighting the feeling of overwhelming.

"Which apparatus do you want to start on? The girls got to wish for one apparatus, it's pretty evenly divided between them."

"I really don't know about this," she said, now fidgeting with the phone in her hands.

"You will work with Sasha, the man's a walking encyclopedia over the code of points and the gymnasts dod's, you'll do fine."

She looked over at Sasha, he looked calm and shrugged at her. She guessed it meant she would have to decide apparatus. "Fine, vault then," she said. There should be the least complicated work involved, and she had been good on the vault.

"Perfect, here are the current vaults for the girls who chose it. You just call in one at a time, if you don't have time for everyone today that's okay, we just continue tomorrow." He rose after handing her a bunch of files. "Let's get to work people. Austin, make sure they're warming up and stretching!"

A minute later there were only Payson and Sasha left in the office.

"I don't understand why they want me," Payson said, taking the file on the top of the pile. "You're the one who made all the decisions on my routines that won the Olympics anyway."

"That's not true," he said. "You were very much apart of the process."

"Yes but..." she sighed.

"If you didn't notice then, you always got what you wanted, even if I tried to stop it or change it. When you had decided on something, that's what happened."

She laughed. "That's not true." but she tried to think of a time when they had a disagreement when she had let him make the final decision. She couldn't think of any. "Come on, let's get started with this madness."

Richard had been right, the girls had wanted her reassurance, and to ask her questions about the Olympics. They kept working through the pile of files and Payson tried to help as much as possible. Most of it was Sasha's doing, but she managed to put her two cents in as well.

Through the week they worked through every apparatus and all the girls got the help they wanted. The last file on the table was Becca's. They were supposed to come up with a new beam routine. It was a bit more than they had helped the other girls with. Or Sasha was redesigning routines all the time, but she hasn't been involved in it. All the girls could hire choreographers if they wanted, so Payson was just a little worried her sister would be singled out by the other girls as getting special treatment. This far Becca hadn't said anything about it though.

"Do you have any ideas?" Sasha asked as they were looking at the sheet of paper describing Becca's current routine. It was early Saturday morning and after an entire week in the gym Payson felt beat. One positive side effect of working with Sasha all week was that once again they had managed to work past the awkwardness.

"Not really," She said. "You know beam was my weakest event."

"Finishing fourth at the Olympics I wouldn't call weak," Sasha smiled.

They'd had this conversation before. Right after the beam event finals she had been so disappointed over missing out on a medal. Sasha had tried to convince her fourth place was nothing to be unhappy about.

"I'm very pleased with all my placements at the Olympics, but beam was never my strongest event, and you know it."

Sasha smirked. "University has learned you to argue at least." He got up. "How about a cup of coffee before we head out there?"

"Yes please," Payson said, following him out of the office.

The gym on Saturdays was always full of people. Several different levels were training at the same time, creating a sense of chaos in the air. But if you knew where and how to look, there were actually an organized plan behind it all. On the floor in the far back of the gym the elite girls were warming up. On the uneven bars over the pit a group of level ones were practicing. Two different levels groups of boys were working on the rings.

Leaving the chaos behind, they sneaked into the still empty kitchen and filled two cups of coffee to the bring before sitting down in the soft, that was usually always occupied by gymnasts of various ages.

"What did you study at NYU?" Payson asked, leaning back and pulling her legs up under her.

"Literature."

"Really?" she thought back of the big bookshelves at his apartment. "If I hadn't decided on physical therapy, I would probably have done literature."

They disappeared deeper and deeper into the world of literature. They talked about everything from Romeo and Juliet to The Hunger Games. Not until Matt knocked on the door and told them Becca was ready for the beam, did they realize they had sat there for more than half an hour. Payson loved the feeling of being relaxed around Sasha again, but it also almost scared her how caught up in a moment they could be.

She followed Sasha back into the gym, as he started going through loose ideas with Becca she kept in the background.

Sitting on the floor close to the beam, studying Sasha and Becca going through the routine, Payson spotted a girl with a knee brace. She had seen the girl before, but she usually came in when the rest of them were leaving, now she was heading over to the uneven bars where she started an arm and core strengthening workout.

Payson got up from the floor and walked over to the office where Richard was cleaning out his desk. It was very sad, seeing him go. Both Payson and Becca had grown very attached to the coach.

"How's the routine going?" he asked and looked up from the drawers he was going through.

"Good, I think," she smiled. "Beam was never one of my strength." she looked out through the window and saw that the girl was still working on the uneven bars. "Who's the girl with the brace?" she asked.

Richard came over and looked out through the window. "Oh, that's Jennifer," he said. "She tore her ACL and injured her meniscus at least six months ago, then she got a very bad infection after the surgery. The doctors says she won't be able to come back, but she's not giving up. She comes in after hours to not have to see the other girls training. I think she's mostly angry at them but also a bit jealous, she was always the most focused one."

"I know that feeling," Payson said. "Do you think she would mind if I talked to her?"

"Not at all," Richard said. "I actually think it would be a very good idea. If somebody can come back, it would be her, and if anyone could help her, it would be you."

Payson didn't know how much she could help, but she didn't thought she would hurt anyway. So she headed over to the girl who was now sitting under the bars and was breathing hard.

"Hi," she said, leaning against the chalk box.

"Oh, you're Payson Keeler!" it was both a question and a statement.

"I am," She smiled. "How's rehab training going?" she asked.

"Not very good," the girl said. "I'm still not allowed to put any weight on the knee if the brace isn't locked."

Payson sat down across from the girl as she continued talking. It turned out Jennifer's ACL injury was very similar to the one Payson had gotten as a junior, but the infection after the surgery complicated things.

"You should train in water," Payson said. "Doing conditioning in water is a great way to keep the fitness level high until you can start working out properly."

"Is that what you did?" Jennifer asked.

Payson shook her head. "I wish I had. No, I read about it in school. I can try make a program for you if you want."

"You can?" the girl smiled. "That would be so good," she said.

Jennifer went back to training and Payson walked over to the office and Richard again. He had a big smile on his face and looked almost smug.

"How did it go?" he asked.

"Good, I think," Payson said. "I think I could help her with the rehab training. She could benefit from training in water."

"I know that you don't want to coach, and going back to school will be more than full time work for you. But until you're a physical therapist, I would love for you to be a kind of rehab-coach here. A very part-part time job, but I really do think you have a lot to give to the kids here. Help them come back from injuries, and even better, be a part of designing the programs so to prevent injuries."

Payson looked at the man who had been a part of making her and her sister's life better. He really wanted her on The City Gym's team. And being involved with gymnastics was something she really wanted. She wondered if he knew what he was offering her. If he knew he was offering her, just as he had with her sister, her dream.

"Of course Richard," she said. "It sounds wonderful. But I'm no expert..."

"I trust you," he smiled.

.:.

After a Sunday of shopping and fixing in the apartment, they were back in the gym on Monday morning. Once again the parents viewing area was empty. Even the gym floor was a bit thin of people. Being December 23rd it was only the elite girls and boys who had practice as usual, and not even all of those were there. She guessed normal families had better things to do a day like this.

Payson sat up on the bleachers listening to Richard going through the plan for the week. They all had both the 24th and 25th off, and practiced full days on both Saturday and Sunday instead. There were no slacking of with two months until Junior Worlds and one month until regular nationals.

With her all around silver, Becca had also qualified for nationals in Miami. It had gotten her a big interview in The New York Times. Gymnastic had been very popular after first the 2008 and then 2012 Olympics, who had both been very successful. Even though last year in Rio had been a disappointment, people still seemed to love the sport. Media was trying to find the hopes for the 2020 Olympics in three years and they seemed to like Becca. The all American pretty girls were always popular, and with Payson as her older sister, Becca was quickly becoming very popular with the publics.

Payson watched her sister and her friends getting started on apparatus training. They would do technique training until lunch and then conditioning all afternoon. With a yawn Payson got up and headed downstairs to get some coffee.

"Hey-Pey!" Austin smiled as she walked into the kitchen. He was pouring coffee into five travel mugs, but added an other one when he spotted her.

"How's Kelly doing? Is your family here yet?" Payson knew Kelly wasn't looking forward to Austin's family arriving. Austin's family had never really liked Kelly, or actually got to know her. When Payson had spoken to her on the phone the night before, Kelly had been exhausted after cleaning the apartment to satisfy his mother.

"They'll get here tomorrow morning, so she's still fine."

"She's in a lot of pain, I could hear it on her last night. When's her next check up?" Payson asked, she couldn't help worry about her friend.

"It's in a week," Austin said and sighed. "I'm worried she's overdoing it," Austin said, putting the coffee pot down. "Not the physical part, but she's stressing so much, she works more than ever... I think she's worried, but she won't speak about it with me. Has she talked about it with you? About the baby or the surgery?"

Payson shook her head. They were always speaking about other things, mostly about Payson and Becca's problems. She felt bad over it, but Kelly was always good at steering the conversation the way she wanted. Usually it was away from herself. "I'll try talking with her," Payson said as she took half of the mugs from Austin. They headed into the gym. Austin went out on the floor to the other assistant coaches while Payson took her three mugs into the office.

"I bring coffee," she said as she entered.

"The secret password," Sasha smiled. "Come in, sit."

Both Sasha and Richard was sitting behind the desk, facing the computer. Payson guessed Richard was handing everything over to Sasha by now. His last day as a coach was coming closer. She placed two of the mugs on the desk before walking over to the sofa in the other end of the office. It was far cozier than sitting on the bleachers. She turned so she could watch the gymnasts. Her sister was practicing the new beam routine with Sonia, the assistant coach.

"I think we should give this a rest and enjoy the coffee," Sasha announced, grabbing a mug and headed over to the sofa and sat down. It was very clear he was frustrated with the computer. If Payson reminded correctly, and of course she did, he had hated the computer stuff back in Boulder as well.

"I'll head out and see how it's going out on the floor," Richard said and was out of the room two seconds later.

"He's so stressed out, running between a million things at once."

"That's understandable," Payson said, looking after the tall man. "He's retiring in a week."

A comfortable silence fell between them as they watched Richard talking with a group of boys over at the rings. They were laughing and joking. Most gymnasts would miss their coach, that thing was clear.

"What are you doing tomorrow?" Payson asked, watching her sister on the beam again.

"I'm not sure, I'll think of something."

"Becca and I have downloaded a bunch of horror movies and filled the kitchen with every unhealthy food item you could think of. Would you like to come over? We're starting tomorrow afternoon and keep going until we pass out sometime Christmas day morning or lunchtime."

Every Christmas before this had been spent exactly the same way every year. There had been a big family dinner on Christmas eve afternoon, followed by a couple of Christmas movies in the evening. Christmas day morning they had exchanged gifts and then walked around in PJ's all day, except for maybe a few hours out in the snow. New York City didn't have any snow yet. And it certainly wouldn't be any family dinner. Payson had bought a couple of Christmas gifts for her sister, and one for Sasha, but that was all the evidence of Christmas in the Keeler apartment.

"Sounds like a good plan for Christmas," Sasha said. "I can bring something to drink."

"Make it strong," Payson smiled a little. She wasn't planning on getting drunk, her sister would be there, but something with alcohol in she wouldn't say no to.

Sasha smiled as well. "I'm on it."

Out by the uneven bars both Payson and Sasha saw a couple of girls waving for Sasha to come. He got up, but before leaving the office he stopped and turned to her.

"Why don't you get out there, do some training?"

Payson shook her head. "No thank you," there were still too much people around for her to make a fool of herself. "I'll enjoy the comfy sofa and do some work," she said, taking an other one of her textbooks and the pile of workout programs out of her purse. She had decided on starting with looking over the standard workouts for the gym, comparing them to what she knew and and what her textbooks said.

.:.

A/N: The next chapter is Christmas. It was supposed to be one chapter, but turned out a bit long. But I'll have it up within a couple of days to make up for it.


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: As promised, the christmas chapter. I hope you like it.

.:.

On December 24th Payson woke up at nine, not feeling as well rested as she should after a sleep in. She had spent the night dreaming very weird dreams. Most of them were about her parents. One of the dreams she could remember most vividly, was of her mom and dad asking what they had done with the house and why they had sold the car. To shake the lingering feeling of uneasiness, she jumped into the shower.

After a quick shower she pulled her robe on and twisted her hair up in a towel-turban. Leaving her room she felt the wonderful smell of coffee. Entering the kitchen she noticed that it was more than just coffee that was waiting. Becca was just putting two plates onto the fully packed table. There were egg, bacon, fruit, fresh bread, juice.

"What is this?" Payson asked.

"It's called breakfast," Becca said, sitting down at the table. "Apparently normal people do it every mornings. And they eat it sitting down."

"Wow," Payson also sat down. "How very nice to pretend to be normal for once."

Sasha arrived at the apartment after lunch. He had a pile of DVDs in one hand and a bag in his other. Payson showed him into the kitchen where he unloaded the things on the counter.

"Coke to Becca," he said, handing her a bottle. "Not coke for us," he said, taking a whine bottle and a couple of beers out of the bag next. "It was as strong I thought we should go," he smiled.

"Good choice," she said, moving it all into the fridge. She then looked through the piles of movies. There were some really scary looking horror movies. "Let's start with a classic. How about The Shining?"

"Yes! My favorite," Becca said. "Let's start right away!" she practically skipped into the living room.

Having movie marathons, especially with horror movies, was something the Keeler sisters had been doing together every time Becca came to visit Payson in LA. Their parents, or mostly their mother, had hated horror movies, so it had been one of the few things the sisters had together, only the two of them. Payson was glad the tradition could continue now, even if it wasn't only the two of them this time.

"I hate this movie," Sasha said as he and Payson sat down in the sofa while Becca was starting the movie.

"Why? It's the best horror movie ever made."

"Always scares the you know what out of me."

Both Pason and Becca laughed.

.:.

A few movies into the marathon evening they decided it was finally time for some real food. Payson had spent the morning making pizza dough, so that they could quickly make home made pizza without taking a too long break from the movies. Long breaks were against the movie marathon rules.

"It's a good thing I'm not working at a pizza place, I'm hopeless at this," Sasha sighed, trying to make the dough flat and somewhat fitting on the tray underneath it.

Becca and Payson, experts after spending years of making pizza with their parents, could barely stop laughing at the mess in front of Sasha.

"I can do it," Becca said, taking the dough from him.

"Trying to get brownie points?" Payson teased her sister.

Becca glared at her.

"Hey, be nice to the pizza maker!" Sasha said. "It's nothing wrong in trying to get on your coach's good side."

"Suck up!" she whispered and laughed before moving on to the topping.

.:.

It took far longer time than it should have to make the pizza, but an hour later the pizzas, were finally ready to be eaten. They set the living room table and loaded the DVD player with the next movie.

"A glass of wine?" Sasha asked Payson who nodded.

"You shouldn't drink alcohol," Becca said, sitting down on the sofa. "It's really bad for you."

Payson couldn't help smiling, it sounded like something she would have said, pre-London that was. "It is. But since we're not training for the Olympics any more, one glass is okay now and then," she said.

"Who has the most Olympic medals between the two of you?" Becca asked as Sasha sat down next to her.

"Me," Payson smiled smugly. "You know I got five, he only got three."

"But since I was your coach, those medals should count as mine as well. And adding Kelly's silver and bronze, that would make my count ten."

"Well, I will beat both of you," Becca said, taking a large bite from her pizza. "You just wait and see."

.:.

After watching eight movies in a row, having been up for 24 hours straight, Payson thought she would pass out.

"I need coffee, very much and very strong coffee," Payson said as the credits started rolling on whatever movie they had just watched.

"Are you already tired?" Becca asked. "We're not even close to our record!"

Their record was 12 movies in a row. They had set it the first time trying. It had been Becca's first visit in LA, her first time watching horror movies at all. Payson remembered how upset their mother had been when Becca had told her about the trip. Payson smiled as she thought about Kim blaming her, lovingly, for Becca's addiction of horror movies. Payson herself blamed her parents for her addiction. She hadn't been allowed to watch horror movies until she was 17. She was only catching up.

"I'm tired, not giving up. A cup of coffee and breakfast, and I'm good to go for hours," Payson said and got up to stretch her back.

"You're both crazy!" Sasha said. "We should sleep! We can't watch any more movies." He looked very tired.

Payson was impressed that he was still awake. "If you give up now, you loose." she pointed out.

"This is madness!" Sasha said. "I need sleep! You don't want to meet a sleep deprived me!"

"I think we are, right now," Payson smiled. "You can take my bed if you want. I'll wake you up for lunch." After Sasha stumbled out of the living room, almost looking like he was drunk, Payson turned to her sister. "Such a lightweight," she smiled. "Pancakes for breakfast?"

.:.

"Payson, Payson. You fell asleep."

Payson slowly opened her eyes and found herself staring into Sasha's blue eyes. He was sitting crunched down next to her on the sofa. She felt goosebumps forming on her arms as his hand was gently stroking her shoulder. He moved away too soon.

Sitting up she grimaced, her back wasn't good at all these days. After her surgery, seven years ago, the doctor had told her her back was as good as new. Payson doubted the doctors now, they had probably not dealt with too many gymnasts in their days.

"I've made lunch," Sasha said, smiling.

Not really believing him, she followed her former coach into the kitchen. She almost laughed out loud when she saw the box of cereals and milk carton on the table.

"That's breakfast," Payson said, but she still sat down and filled up a bowl with cereals and then milk. She was starving. Sasha poured a cup of coffee and handed it to her before sitting down across the table.

"How many movies did you watch?" Sasha asked.

"Eleven," Payson smiled. "Or we fell asleep watching the eleventh." she smiled. "You went to bed after the eighth."

"Makes me feel out of practice," he smiled. "We used to do movie marathons all the time at camps, it was kind of all the fun we could have without getting into too much trouble."

"What are you saying Sasha Belof? I thought you were the rebel?" Payson asked, faking shock. "I always pictured you as a more handsome version of Austin," she laughed.

"More handsome, huh," he laughed as well. "I had my periods. It was mostly just a reaction to my mother's death. Then after I hurt my knee I had nothing that held me back any more, that's when the real rebel phase started. That's why I quit university. I was flunking because I was partying too hard and studying too little."

"I understand the temptation," Payson said. Who knew how she had reacted if she hadn't had Becca. Had she buried herself in work, like Kelly when she's worried or emotional? Or turn to partying and booze, like so many former athletes? Shivering at the thought she focused on the blue eyes across the table from her instead. "How did you know what to do after you dropped out? How did you know you would be a good coach?"

"Good coach," it sounded like he didn't agree. "It's all about not trying to plan everything Payson. If you do your best, think about both others and yourself, it will turn out for the best. And if it for some reason doesn't, you have your friends, and you have me."

"Now," Payson whispered to herself. She had Sasha for now, it was better than nothing, of course. But what would she do when he left? How long was he staying? Until Becca was finished with this Olympic cycle?

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing," she said. She could not dwell on things like that now. There were enough things to worry about.

"Is it time for Christmas gifts now?" Becca suddenly asked, coming out from the living room with her hair on end. Payson couldn't help laughing at the sight. She ate the last of the cereals before going into her room to dig out the present she had hidden.

.:.

Payson had bought Becca a new laptop that she really needed for her homeschooling. When Becca opened the wrapped box her eyes were wider than Payson had ever seen them before. After making sure the box really contained a laptop she jumped up and down for at least ten minutes.

Getting something for Sasha had been a nightmare. She had no idea what to give the man. What do you give the man you really should avoid because you have inappropriate feelings for him? She looked down at the wrapped gift, suddenly feeling very insecure.

She watched Sasha open his gift from Becca. She already knew what was in it, but she enjoyed seeing his smile as he unwrapped the coffee mug. It was a black travel mug with the text _I'm the boss_.

"Thank you so much Becca," he smiled and hugged her.

"I didn't really know what to get you," Payson said with a shrug as she handed him the box she had wrapped the evening before. She watched him unwrapping it, feeling very uneasy and nervous. He lifted the lid and looked between the box and her.

"What is this?" he asked, but the way he said it it was clear he already knew.

"It's only a first draft," she said. "It's been done for a while... I'm not sure what I should do with it."

He took the thick folder out of the box and started flipping through it. He stopped on the second page. She knew he was reading the dedication. Even though it was one of the first things she had written, she still remembered it word by word. _To Sasha, the man who taught a broken girl to fly again. You gave me far more than five olympic medals, you gave me my life back. _

"I love it," Sasha said, pulling her into a hug. "I really love it," he repeated. "I'll read it right away."

"You don't need to..." she started but he didn't let her finish before repeating he would read it as soon as he got the time. She had started writing her memoirs just because she didn't want to forget anything that had happened. She had started right after the Olympics, on the flight from London actually. Since then every major publisher had contacted her and asked if she wanted to write and give out a memoir. She had all told them no, this far at least.

She had written it for herself, never intending to letting it be published. But now? The way the girls in the gym wanted to talk with her about it all? Maybe people would really want to know what it had been like? She called it _The Girl who Broke Her Back_. For two years that was who she had been known as, at least for the people who only became interested in sports during major championships and the Olympics. She hadn't showed it for anyone yet and she felt terrified that Sasha would hate it.

She had written about the kiss, about realizing she had a crush on the one man she couldn't. She had written about Nicky and Rigo. About Kelly, Austin and the fight with Kaylie. About the cortisone, about the pain and the struggles. She had been more honest on those papers than she had ever been before in her life. She had stopped at college. She had assumed her life would become normal after that. She hadn't gone back to it since that first year in LA.

"Payson, you need to open your presents as well!" Becca said.

Payson opened Becca's gift first. She unwrapped the red paper and pulled out a leather case for her iPad. She had been eyeing the case for some time, but somehow she still had trouble buying unnecessary things for herself. She hugged her sister and thanked her before turning to the remaining gift. She unwrapped it slowly, feeling Sasha's eyes on her. Out of the box fell a book. An old book. She turned it around and saw that it was Romeo and Juliet.

"It's a first edition," he said with a smile. "Do you like it?"

"I love it," Payson said, carefully opening it before closing it and looking up at her former coach. "But it's too much. I can't take this."

"Of course you can," he said, already turning to Becca who was also opening his gift. "What do you think?"

Payson looked over at her sister who unwrapped a framed picture of the interview and photo that had been in the New York Times a while back. It was Becca's first big article, Payson should have thought about doing the same.

"This is so cool!" Becca said, hugging her coach. "Thank you so much!"

"I have an other gift for you as well, the both of you," he said, a secretive smile on his lips. "Get changed, we need to go out for this one."

.:.

It turned out he was taking them to the gym. It was empty and dark when he let them inside.

"A gymnastics private wouldn't be a good gift on Christmas," Becca said but fell quiet again when Payson gently elbowed her.

"We're not going to practice," Sasha said as they walked out on the floor. As they walked by the pit he pushed them both down in the foam rubber sea. Becca shrieked and Payson laughed. It had been ages since she played in the pit. When they were younger, every workout session had ended with playing in the foam rubber. As they got older, it was used to falling on while practicing new tricks on vault or the uneven bars that was placed over the hole in the floor.

She took one of the foam pieces and threw it at Sasha, or tried to at least, it missed him by several inches.

"I see why you were stuck with gymnastics," he said, throwing it back at her. He took a few steps back before jogging closer. He did a double salto and landed on his back in the soft pit next to Payson.

"That was nothing," she laughed at his attempt to impress them. She climbed out of the pit and backed away from it. Without a thought of warmup or how she hasn't done this for five years, she threw herself into a back-out full-in. She landed in the pit, not able to stop herself from laughing.

"Try the bars Pay!" Becca smiled. "I bet I can beat you now!"

.:.

Without really knowing what happened, Payson had been doing various gymnastics tricks for hours when she finally had to give up. She was panting as she jumped up and sat on the beam. She watched her sister showing off on the other beam. Sasha stood next to her, leaning against the beam, also watching Becca.

"Thank you for this," Payson said as she had caught her breath.

"Gymnastics doesn't need to be serious all the time Pay," he said. "It can be fun, it should be fun. And it's okay to train even if you've quit."

Payson closed her eyes and listened to the solid thuds of Becca landing and taking off from the beam. It had been like flying again. She hadn't realized how much she had missed gymnastics. Even if she wasn't able to do half of what she had, once upon a time, it felt great playing around with the tricks she still could master. Payson opened her eyes and saw that Sasha was studying her.

Becca shouted something about bathroom and disappeared.

"I never thought I would see anything as beautiful as your floor routine at world tryout," Sasha suddenly said. "I was wrong. You look absolutely stunning just playing around."

She shivered and felt goosebumps forming on her arms as she saw the intensity in his eyes. He was standing close to her, so she reached out and pulled him even closer. She was still sitting on the beam and when she got him in front of her, she locked him in place with her legs around his waist. For once she was taller than him.

"We should not be doing this," he said, but he didn't move or look away. She looked into his blue eyes and one of her hands got a life on it's own and gently traced the features of his face. His eyelids shuddered but didn't close.

"Will you run away if I kiss you?" she asked in a whisper, she didn't know where the bravery came from.

"I should," he whispered back.

She took it as a no and closed the distance. As their lips met she felt the familiar, yet powerful, electricity she felt every time they touched. Her hands found their way to the back of his neck, trying to pull him closer. He was also pulling her closer, his hands on her back, and soon he was the one holding her weight up instead of the beam. They simply couldn't come any closer.

When they broke apart for air, they heard the changing room door open, and Sasha slowly let her slide off of him, until she stood, slightly wobbly, on her own legs.

"Don't you dare going weird on me now," she whispered and moved a few feet away from him in time for her sister to come out.

"I'm starving," Becca declared, jumping up on the beam next to them.

.:.

A/N: There has been several people asking about Sasha's pov. It's a conscious decision on my part not writing from both of theirs pov's. Sasha will explain himself in his own time. When I'm done with this fic, I might write an outtake with Sasha's pov on the time from Payson's first visit to him showing up in NYC. If anyone is interested in reading it.

Next chapter will be new years, and it'll be a bit lighter and hopefully funnier then earlier chapters. Since I'm not used to writing fluffy pieces, I need some more time to edit it. It'll probably not be up until the end of the weekend, at the earliest.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: I never, in my whole live, thought I would receive 80 review, all of them positive, about a story I wrote. I want to thank you all so much. I value you all so much. After this chapter I want to ask you're advice about something.

.:.

Payson looked at her reflection in the tall mirror in Kelly's apartment. She was dressed in a long, black, one-shoulder dress. It hugged her curves in all the right places, Kelly had told her. Along the line under her chest was a small band of glittering stones. She looked okay she guessed. She had her long hair out, falling in soft curls down past her shoulders. Her makeup wasn't too heavy, but she had dark eyes and red lips. Her high heels were also red and so high she was scared she would fall.

"You look beautiful Payson," Austin said, coming out from the kitchen.

"You don't look too shabby yourself," she smiled. Austin was dressed in a black tux, white shirt and blue tie. Payson had never seen him as dressed up before.

"Do you want some wine before we go?" Austin asked and motioned for her to follow him into the kitchen. He closed the door almost all the way after checking that Kelly and Becca was still in their bedroom. "Can I tell you something?" he whispered, no intention of taking out any wine.

"Of course, anything Austin," Payson said. She then watched her best friend pull out a small velvet box out of his inner pocket. Payson was holding her breath as he opened the blue box and showed her the ring inside it. "I'm going to propose, tonight," he whispered.

"Finally," Payson couldn't help smiling. She hugged her friend. "She'll say yes, right away," she whispered, wanting to jump and scream, but this really wasn't the time for that.

The door to the bedroom opened and Austin quickly put the small box away. Out of the bedroom came Becca. Payson almost wanted to cry when she saw her sister. Becca looked so grown up. She was dressed in a beautiful green dress and black heels. Her hair was in a braid and the makeup minimal.

"You look beautiful Becca!" Austin said and hugged the younger Keeler. "Payson you have to watch out with this one," he laughed.

"You do look beautiful," Payson said to her sister. "How's it going for Kelly?"

"She's a bit upset I think," Becca said, looking between Payson and Austin.

"I'll take this one," Payson said, stopping Austin and walking into the bedroom herself. She had a feeling this was a girlfriend problem.

And she was right. Kelly was standing in front of the mirror in the bedroom, dressed and ready. She looked to be on the verge of tears.

"I look so fat," she said, her hands on her stomach.

Kelly, now in week 20 and halfway through the pregnancy, wasn't showing much. Of course she had gained a little weight, but it wasn't really visible on the brunette. In the dress she had chosen for the night, a midnight blue halter neck, a small bump was showing as she pulled the dress tighter around the stomach. If she just let it hang naturally, it wasn't visible at all.

"Kelly, you look absolutely beautiful," Payson said, taking her friends hands. "You're healthy, your baby is healthy and Austin is looking stunning. You enjoy this night! And that's an order!"

Kelly chuckled and wiped away an escaped tear. "I'll try, I promise."

Together they walked out of the bedroom to a waiting Becca and Austin. Payson always enjoined watching Kelly and Austin interact. Not in a creepy or pervey way. She just liked seeing how uncomplicated and still intense a relationship could be. The way Austin's eyes lit up when he saw Kelly stepping out from the bedroom made her heart swell for her friends. Kelly and Austin quickly kissed and Payson could see him whispering something in her ear, the smile on Kelly's lips made Payson smile as well.

"We should head down to the taxi," Austin said. "It's already been waiting for fifteen minutes."

.:.

The City Gym's annual new years ball took place at a very nice and large hotel not far from the gym. The gang was running a bit late, and when they finally got there they were amongst the last guests to arrive. The dining room was beautifully decorated in gold and white. Around the room were small round tables with places for six to eight at each. People stood in small groups, talking and mingling.

With her welcome drink in one hand and her purse in the other, Payson found her way to her table. She, Austin and Kelly were placed at the same table, close to the center of the room. Becca quickly disappeared over to her place amongst the other junior gymnasts. Just as they had found their chairs, a woman at the large table in the front of the room asked for everyone's attention.

"My name is Eve Rosewell and I'm the head of the parents board here at the City Gym. I want to wish you all welcome to the annual new years eve ball. Especially Richard O'Malley, who had his last day as head coach today, and to Sasha Belof, our new head coach." everybody clapped their hands. "Now please find your places and make yourself comfortable, the first course will be served shortly."

Sitting down, Payson spotted Sasha across the room. He was dressed in a black tux, looking better then ever. As he turned and caught her eyes, she had to force herself to look away. The first course arriving in front of her was the perfect distraction.

.:.

The desert and coffee was finished and cleared away with half an hour left of the year. Payson and Kelly were watching Becca and Austin dance with big smiles on their lips.

"He's such a kid sometimes," Kelly said, shaking her head.

Payson watched across the room. Sasha was talking with some parents at his table. Every time she looked over, it took only a few seconds before he looked up and their eyes locked. They hadn't talked properly since the kiss during Christmas. It wasn't that it was awkward, or not only that at least, they had both been so busy in the gym. All she wanted was to do was to go over to him, but with all the gymnasts, parents and other coaches around, this was not the place for any kind of talk between them.

"Becca abandoned me on the dance floor," Austin said as he suddenly showed up at their table again. "A little snotty gymnast had the nerves to ask to take over the dance!"

Payson looked over to the dance floor. She spotted her sister dancing with a dark guy who looked roughly Becca's own age. They were both smiling, talking and not dancing too close. All things that made Payson relax a little.

"Kelly, may I have this dance?" Austin asked with a silly little bow. Kelly laughed but agreed and they both disappeared out on the dance floor. Payson watched them go with a smile on her lips. Kelly's insecurities from earlier that evening was gone and it was all thanks to Austin. They really made a perfect couple.

"You're way too beautiful to just sit here as the band is playing such a nice song," Richard said, holding out his hand. "Would you do me the honor of dancing with an old man?"

Payson couldn't help smiling. Even if she hated dancing, she couldn't say no to the coach, not on a day like this. She took his hand and let him lead her out on the floor. The music was very beautiful and they danced in silence for several minutes before Richard broke it.

"Can I ask you something Payson?" Richard asked.

"Of course," Payson answered, looking up at the retiring coach.

"Why are you and Sasha so damn stubborn?"

"What?" she didn't know what to say, what was he saying?

"He is not going to make it easy for you," Richard said. "In his over active brain it's too complicated. I don't know the backstory. But the way he looks at you, and the way you look at him..." He shook his head with a sad smile. "Life's too short for being foolish."

Suddenly Payson got an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach. "Are you okay? You're not sick, are you?" the too short life comment scared her.

"You've been through a lot lately Payson, Becca too. Your brain instantly goes to the worst case scenario... At the age of 70 you've had one or two scares that make you realize you're not immortal. I'm not sick Payson, but I'm no longer 25 either. I want to spend time with my family. With the people I love. When you think you're going to loose it all, even if it's only for a few days, you realize how much your loved ones really mean to you."

"I don't understand what you're trying to say," Payson said.

"Sasha isn't going to make the first move, or the second or the third. However much he wants to, he simply can't, for whatever reason. If you want it, you need to get it yourself. Do you understand me Payson?"

She nodded, she understood.

"It's only minutes till midnight, go. I'm going to find my Annabelle."

Before she had time to psyche herself out, she hugged Richard and let him go. Glancing around the room she saw that Kelly and Austin were still dancing together, large smile on their faces. Becca was now sitting at a table in the back of the room, talking with the same guy she had danced with before. Payson could for her life not remember his name. In the other end of the room Sasha was still at the same table, not talking with anyone, but studying her. She locked eyes with him, and nodded for him to follow her out on the balcony. The night was dark and chilly, but she didn't care. She lead the British man along the balcony. They rounded a corner before coming to a stop.

"What's wrong?" Sasha asked.

Through the open window they could hear people starting to count down the old year.

"Nothing is wrong," she said. Even though she had only drunk one glass of wine and one of champagne, she let the alcohol make her brave. Richard's words, about Sasha watching her, also helped. Inside the people reached ten and continued counting down. "Don't question everything," she whispered and stepped closer. Before her nerves took over, she got up on her toes, put her arms around his neck and kissed him. She didn't even have time to wonder if he was going to push her away before she felt his lips returning the kiss and his hands move across her back, pulling her closer.

"Five, four, three, two, one. Happy New Years!"

"Happy New Years," Payson whispered as they came up for air.

"Happy New Years," Sasha whispered, smile on his lips. With a finger under her chin, he leaned in and kisser her again. It was like everything around them disappeared as their lips touched. All Payson could concentrate on was how his hair and muscular back felt under her hands, how his hands felt against her lower back, and how soft but determent his lips felt against hers.

"Payson? Are you out here?"

As Kelly's voice made its way to Payson's brain they broke apart. Both of them were still out of breath as Kelly and Austin came around the corner on the balcony. Payson spotted the ring on Kelly's left ring finger right away, but she didn't say anything, instead she worked hard to contain her smile and focused on catching her breath.

"Are we interrupting something?" Austin asked, a smug smile on his face.

"Not at all," Payson said, brushing her hand through her hair. "What's up?" she asked, but she couldn't keep the smile off her face any longer.

"You told her?" Kelly asked, turning to punch her fiancé on his once bad shoulder.

"Told her what?" Sasha asked, obviously confused over what was going on.

"Austin asked me to marry him," Kelly smiled.

"Oh, congratulations," Sasha smiled, hugging the lucky couple.

Payson could see on Kelly that she had been crying. "Let me see the ring Kel!" Payson said, feeling the excitement growing inside her. Kelly held out her left hand and they both studied the simple ring. It was a plain and simple gold band. It was the most beautiful thing Payson had ever seen.

"Look at the engraving," Austin said.

"You had it engraved?" Kelly asked and took the ring off. On the inside of the ring they could read Austin & Kelly, the day's date, and then the sign for infinity. Payson felt tears pressing behind her eyes and she quickly pulled both her best friends into a hug.

"I love you both so much," Payson whispered. "I'm so happy for you."

"You will be my maid of honor, won't you?" Kelly asked. "Please?"

"You certainly don't have to beg me Kel," Payson laughed. "Of course I will."

"And Becca needs to be a bridesmaid too," Kelly said. "And we need to start planning the wedding!"

In all the years Payson had known Kelly Parker, Payson had never thought Kelly would be this excited over a wedding. If her memory served her right, Kelly had huffed and mumbled something about silly when Lauren and Kaylie dreamed about weddings back in their days at The Rock.

"We need to tell Becca," Kelly said, grabbing Payson's hand and dragging her away from the two men who were looking at them with raised eyebrows. Just before walking through the balcony doors, Kelly came to a stop and Payson almost walked into her.

"Were you and Sasha kissing?" she asked, turning to face Payson.

"We can talk about an other day Kelly," Payson laughed. "Come on, let's find Becca."

Walking through the doors, they only came a few feet inside the room before Kelly once again came to a stop. This time so quickly that Payson walked into her back.

"Later Kelly, let's focus," Payson started, but then she saw why Kelly had came to a stop. In the corner of the room she saw a blond girl in a green dress making out with a dark guy.

"Becca?" she asked, and sure, as the girl spun around they could both see that it was Payson's 14 year old sister.

"Payson, Kelly, hi," Becca said, cheeks bright red. "This is Jason, he trains at the gym..."

"Nice to meet you Jason," Payson said, not knowing what else to do. "Becca, I think we're heading home now. We have something to celebrate."

"Celebrate what?" Becca asked. Before Payson or Kelly could say anything, Becca started to scream and jump up and down. She was quickly coming over and more or less grabbed Kelly's hand to look at the ring. "Oh my god, it's so beautiful!" Becca said and hugged a bewildered Kelly. "Congratulations!"

.:.

The gang moved the celebration to Kelly and Austin's apartment. As soon as they got there Austin opened a bottle of champagne that he poured into three glasses. In the last two glasses he poured sparkling water, those he handed to Kelly and Becca.

"For Austin and Kelly!" Payson said and raised her glass for her friends. As they all had tasted the content from their glass Payson turned to Kelly. "How did he do it? What did he say?"

"Tell us all the details," Becca added.

Kelly smiled and took an other sip from the glass. "We were dancing, and he was talking about how he thought I looked beautiful. Then he just told me he couldn't imagine spending even one day without me, and he asked me to marry him."

"No stupid joke? I'm impressed Tucker," Sasha laughed and slapped his back.

"How romantic," Becca mused.

.:.

The following morning Payson stood in the office, looking out through the window as she tried to keep her emotions under control.

"He looks so smug," she said, not letting Jason Scott go with her eyes. She followed his every move. Between every apparatus, if Becca was also resting, they would look at each other, or even worse, talk by the water cooler.

"He's looking very focused on what he's doing Payson," Sasha said, looking over her shoulder. The boy was studying an other gymnast who worked out on the rings.

"Right now yes," she sighed and sat down on the sofa. "Don't you have a no dating rule here?"

"We don't," Sasha said.

"Why not?" Payson asked, the anger once again flowing through her veins. "You should enforce one! You're good at making up rules!"

"It didn't really work in Boulder, why would it work here?" he asked.

"Sure it did!" she said, voice high. "Except for the whole Lauren and Kaylie and Carter drama... And Emily getting pregnant... And I guess the whole thing with me kissing you... And the Lauren, Max and I thing... Or Nicky Russo breaking my heart..."

"For wanting to enforce a rule, you certainly broke it enough times," Sasha said.

"Fine, maybe it wasn't the best rule. But what should I do?" she felt completely out of her depth. She could barely handle her own love life, she was not ready for her sister to have one as well.

"Calm down Pay. You remember how it was to be 14?"

"I do! And I didn't go around kissing boys!"

Sasha started laughing. "No you waited until you were 17 and kissed your coach who was 10 years older than you. That's much better."

"Shut up!" she threw the pillow at the very annoying man across the table.

"Calm down Payson," he said, still smiling though. "I'll talk with them. Scare them straight." she thanked him. "And in the mean time I suggest you make sure she knows everything there is to know about using protection."

"She's not having sex! I'm forbidding it!" Payson shouted and got up. She could not stay in the gym. She needed fresh air.

.:.

A couple of days later, Payson asked her sister to follow her into the kitchen as they got home from the gym. They made tea and sat down at the table. Payson looked at her sister. Her very young and sweet and naive sister.

She took a deep breath. "Did mom or dad talk with you about... sex... and things?"

Becca smiled a little. "I know where babies come from Payson. We're not having sex, we just kissed a couple of times."

Payson felt herself relax a little, not that she had actually thought her sister was having sex, but it was still good to hear it. "When I trained at The Rock, we had a no dating rule," she said. She should have planned the talk, but every time she had even thought about it she just wanted to pass out.

"Really? Why?"

"I think they wanted to protect us. When you train gymnastics like you do, like I did. We grow up quickly. We miss a lot of things in our childhood, and I think they wanted to protect us from things like heartbreaks."

"So you didn't date until after the Olympics?" It sounded like Becca didn't believe it.

"Well," she considered how much she should share with her sister. Her mother had always been very open and honest with Payson, and in turn, Payson had always known she could turn to her parents about anything. She thought about her friends during their time at The Rock. They hadn't had that kind of relationship with their parents. "The no dating rule was a rule that, we all quoted when we wanted, but then also broke when we wanted... There were this boy, Nicky, that I trained with. We kissed once or twice. We didn't really dated though. I didn't really brake the rule until we came to TC."

"When you met Rigo?"

Payson nodded.

"Did you have sex with him?" Becca asked not in a teasing or embarrassed way, she seemed simply curious.

"I did," Payson said. "We liked each other very much, and we waited until we both felt ready."

"How do you know you're ready?"

"First off, you're much older. Becca, I'm not kidding, you can not have sex now. It's against the law."

"I'm not having sex until I have at least as many Olympic medals as you."

Payson smiled. She had also said she would wait until after the Olympics. "That's good," she said. "If you ever want to talk about anything, anything at all Becca, you can ask me."

"I know," Becca said. "But you don't need to worry about me Pay. Jay and I, we're just friends really," she said as she got up from the table. Becca left her now empty mug in the sink and left the kitchen.

"And always use condom!" Payson called after her sister. "After the Olympics I mean!" she called after her sister. "Condom, remember that!"

.:.

A/N: I'm not too happy about this chapter. It felt a bit jumpy, or cut up, and I couldn't get the right flow. But I did my best, so I hope you enjoyed it anyway. In the next chapter Payson is going back to school.

And now I need your help:

I've been thinking about how long this fic should be. I had first planned on making the chapter where Becca goes to junior world the last one (haven't written it yet, but it should be around five chapters away). But lately I've really wanted to write Kelly and Austin having the baby, which would be in the beginning of May. The junior worlds is in the end of February, so it's quite a jump. I'm not sure what I should do. I don't want my story to just go on and on and keep repeating stuff (I hate those stories, that's written just because the authors has many followers). What do you think? I really appreciate all of yours opinions. Should I go on and write until Kelly gives birth to the baby (I'm sure I can find things to write about, it's not that) or should I stop where I intended to (after junior worlds)?


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: I'm so sorry for the long wait. My internet connection has been down. But here's the next chapter.

.:.

The night after the sex-talk with her sister, Payson didn't sleep at all. But it had nothing to do with the talk itself. It had all to do with what was waiting the following day. Payson was going back to school. Her first class started at 9 am the following morning. Without having slept anything, she got up at 6.30 to see her sister off.

As she got out of the shower, she smelled breakfast. In the kitchen she discovered Becca, setting the table. Which was a rare sight before noon in the Keeler sister's apartment.

"What is this? What are we celebrating?" she asked, almost throwing herself over the food.

"Well, we're celebrating you going back to school. And you being a very good sister, even if you're very embarrassing sometimes."

Payson couldn't help smiling. They ate together and then Becca had to leave to go to practice. Payson was left alone in the apartment and she was starting to get really nervous.

It took her forty five minutes and five changes before deciding what to wear for her first day at NYU. As she gathered the things she would need during the day she saw that she had gotten texts from both Kelly and Sasha. Kelly's was short and to the point. _Knock 'em dead, you'll do great._ Sasha's was a bit sweeter, she couldn't stop herself from smiling as she read it. _Just wanted to wish you good luck for today, even if you don't need luck. You'll do great. I'll miss you in the gym._

To get to NYU from the apartment Payson took the same subway line as she and her sister took every time they were going to the gym. She only had to go one stop further. It wasn't really that far, between the apartment and the gym and NYU. Often in the afternoon she chose to walk, but not really a fan of mornings, she always took the subway there.

With her she had the map and schedule she'd gotten sent home by the dean. It hadn't looked too difficult to find the building, so before heading over to that part of the campus she found a coffee cart. The line wasn't too far so she quickly got her coffee and could move on to the task of finding her first class. She got the map out.

"Can I help you?" a guy suddenly asked.

Payson looked up. "Yes please. I'm looking for that building," she said and pointed on the marked building on the map. The guy was tall and blond and kind of reminded her of one of the guys she had been out with a few times in LA.

"I'm heading the same way, I can show you," his smile was almost blindingly perfect. "So are you in med school?"

"Studying to become a physical therapist," Payson said and took a sip from the mug, mostly to have something to do.

"Oh, me too, are you new?"

Payson nodded. "Transferred from LA." she said.

"Cool, do you have _introduction to the joints of the lower extremity_ first class?"

Even though she had already memorized the schedule, she took it up and looked at it. "I am, with a Professor Fritz."

"Nice, that's the same class as me, he said and smiled. "I'm Derek by the way."

"It's nice to meet you Derek, I'm Payson." They walked toward building H.

.:.

"So how come you transferred here? Isn't the weather better in LA?" Maya, one of the girls Payson was having lunch with, asked.

"Just felt like a change of pace," she lied. Here she didn't need to be the orphan girl or the responsible girl who took care of her sister. She could be just Payson again. "I've always loved New York," she added with a shrug.

The morning classes had gone very well. They already had two essays to write and one group project to finish in two weeks. Derek had taken Payson under his wings and introduced her to all his friends, it was them she was now eating lunch with.

"No easy start here," Eric said. "Anyone wants to meet up after class and get started on that research essay? Maya? Derek? Payson?"

"I can't, not today, sorry," Payson said. She was already exhausted, and she had promised Jennifer with the knee brace she would meet the girl at the rehab pool that afternoon as soon classes were done.

"I'm working tonight," Maya sighed. She explained for Payson that she worked part time at the medical library.

"I'm also working," Derek said. He apparently worked at a coffee shop not far from campus, Payson must have been to the coffee shop hundreds of times before. She couldn't remember seeing Derek though. Maybe she hadn't been observant enough.

"Do you mean I'm on my own?" Eric asked with a groan.

"I'll go to the library tomorrow if you want?" Payson said. In LA her group of friends had met up almost every day after classes to study, that had been how she passed all classes so well, hours and hours of studying.

"Perfect, I have tomorrow off," Derek said. It was only Maya who couldn't meet up the following day. They decided to get started on both the individual essays and the group project the following day.

"We better head back," Maya said after checking the time. "Professor Fitz is always early."

Payson took her purse over one shoulder and followed her new friends back to the class room where they had spent the morning. She felt relived, having found people to do the group project with. And that she was fitting in. She was glad to finally be doing something that moved her life forward.

.:.

At four, after the last class was over, Payson took the subway to the pool closest to the gym. Jennifer was already waiting for her.

"I'm so grateful that you're helping me with this," Jennifer said as they headed inside.

Payson was also grateful, she was looking forward to see if she could help the girl, it was almost like her own experiment. "You go and change, I'll buy some water and meet you inside."

After a day in classes, Payson felt like her brain was scrambled. She really needed cold water if she wanted to survive the rest of the afternoon.

Payson spent an hour on the side of the pool, teaching Jennifer a program of exercises that hopefully would help the girl return to gymnastics. It was almost painful, watching Jennifer work, it reminded Payson about herself after the fall. The feeling of not knowing if your work would pay off? At the time it had been the hardest feeling in the world. Now Payson knew there were much worse feelings, but she hoped Jennifer would never figure that one out.

At five thirty Payson and Jennifer left the pool. Jennifer headed home, not wanting to step her foot inside the gym yet. Payson on the other had had gotten a text from Becca saying she was staying late to practice the new beam routine, so she decided to buy a smoothie for her sister and then headed to the gym.

Entering the gym she took a few deep breaths to calm herself down, it felt like she had been on the run the whole day. Gymnastics had always been her place to escape reality, and it still worked. In the gym they were only around ten gymnasts still working out. Becca was working on the beam, Sasha standing next to her.

"Hey, how's it going?" she asked after her sister stumbled out of her dismount.

"Crappy," Becca muttered.

Payson looked from her sister to Sasha, he rolled his eyes, making Payson having to work hard not to laugh. She had never seen him rolling his eyes before. "I brought a smoothie. I thought I would do some work and then we can walk home together?"

Becca nodded, and after a quick look at her coach she accepted the smoothie.

"Take ten, I'll be back," Sasha said to Becca who jumped up to sit on the beam.

Payson and Sasha walked together to the office. As Payson closed the door behind her he turned to her former coach.

"What's up with her?" she asked. It was clear her sister was very grumpy.

"She's extremely similar to you, did you know that? I had that talk with her and Jason, and now she's a bit angry with me," he smiled, not looking too upset by the fact that his gymnast was brooding.

"What did you say?" she asked, barely able to keep from laughing.

"I told them I would punish them with extra workouts until the Olympics if I ever caught them making out in the gym or at anything gymnastics related. So now all you have to do is to keep them apart the rest of the time."

"Because that's so easy," she sighed. "What did they say?"

"Jason was actually very nice, even if you don't want to hear it. He told me to blame him and not her."

"Aw," Payson didn't want to like the boy, but it was nice to hear that he at least was a gentleman. It was kind of a reassurance that Becca had chosen a nice boy to make out with, even if Payson had preferred if her sister had skipped boys all together.

.:.

"Did you tell Sasha about the kiss?" Becca asked as they got home the same evening.

"Nope," Payson lied. Some secrets were worth keeping, even if it meant a small white lie.

"I don't understand how he seems to know everything. Do you think Kelly told Austin who told Sasha?" she asked.

"She promised she wouldn't, didn't she?" Payson said.

"But then how did he know?"

"I don't know. When I asked he said he was an all knowing god. I kind of doubt that though. But he did figure out some very top notch secrets back when ha coached me, Austin and Kelly. He knew about Austin and Kelly way before anyone else, he knew about me and Rigo. He knew that we sneaked out to a party when he had just arrived to Boulder... That last thing he punished us severely for. You don't want to be part of a practice like that, I suggest you listen to him and do as told."

Becca sighed. "He's very annoying sometimes."

Payson laughed. "He sure is."

.:.

The following afternoon, after a long day of lectures, Payson found herself in the big medical library with her new found friends. They were all feeling slightly overwhelmed by schoolwork, on the second day. Payson had started on her research essay the evening before and now they were planning the group project.

"We need people to do fitness tests on," Derek said. "Any ideas?"

"What age group?" Payson asked, looking over the sheet with instructions again. "Over 16 years old," she answered her own question. They needed ten people. "If we want to test elite athletes, I can probably get 10 people to agree."

"Really? How?" Eric asked.

"My sister train at The City Gym with my old coach, I'm sure some of the gymnasts there would agree to be tested."

"You are that Payson Keeler!" Eric exclaimed. "I knew you looked familiar. You have an Olympic gold medal!"

"Four actually," she said, smiling. It was fun, from time to time, to shock people. "But enough about that. Do we want elite gymnasts?"

"Sure, that would be cool," Derek said. "Can you set it up for this weekend? Maybe Sunday?"

"Sunday is their day off, I think they would rather do it on Saturday before practice or something."

"Any time is fine with me," Eric said with a shrug. "We would get the coolest results out of everyone!"

"I can't promise anything, but I can call the coach now and ask him to ask them?"

Both Derek and Eric agreed. Payson took her phone and walked out of the library. Outside snow was falling for the first time that season. She didn't have a jacket on, so she hurried to dial Sasha's number.

"Hey, what's up?" he asked as he answered on the second ring.

Payson explained the assignment and what they had spoken about. "Do you think some gymnasts would agree to do it?" she was walking back and forth outside the library to keep warm.

"Of course," he said. "I'll make sure they will. How many do you want?"

Payson explained and Sasha promises he would find enough gymnasts and that they could be in the fitness center at the gym all Saturday if they needed it.

"Thank you Sasha, you're always saving me," she said.

"How about a dinner to make up for it? I miss your home cooked food."

"Of course," Payson smiled. "Do you wanna come over this weekend?"

Sasha was quick to agree and in her mind Payson already started planning what kind of food to make for him.

"Are you coming by the gym any time soon?" he asked before they ended the call.

"Are you missing me?" she teased.

He laughed. "The gymnasts are missing you."

They ended the call without Payson promising anything. She hurried back inside and told her study group the good news.

.:.

"Why can't I be in the experiment?" Becca asked as the sisters made their way to the gym on Saturday morning. Payson was early to set up everything and Becca had tagged along, so when they entered the gym, only Sasha was there. He was doing pull ups on the uneven bars, his bare back to the door.

"Wow, he's got some muscles," Becca whispered. "I understand why you kissed him, even though he's old."

Payson elbowed her sister. "Morning!" she called out, causing Sasha to jump down and turn to them. His abs looked rock hard, just like she remembered them. Payson wanted to ask him not to pull the shirt on, but she stopped herself. That would not have been appropriate.

"Morning," he said. After pulling on a t-shirt he walked over to them . "Ready for the experiments?"

"Think so," Payson said. She was feeling a bit nervous. They had gone over everything that needed to be done that day, they wanted everything finished so they could work on the essay the following week.

"You can test it on me first," Becca said.

"You go and warm up!" Sasha said, gently turning and pushing Becca further into the gym. Payson could hear her sister sigh.

"I'll go set up," Payson said, nodding toward the fitness center.

"I'll make some coffee for you and your friends."

"Thanks," Payson said. "They should be here soon."

As if the universe had heard her words, her friends came through the double doors. They looked impressed as they took in their surroundings before coming over to Payson and Sasha.

"Guys, this is Sasha, he was my coach in London and now he's head coach here. Sasha this is Derek, Eric and Maya," she introduced them and they all shook hands. "We're heading through there," Payson said, nodding toward the fitness center. Her friends walked in front of her, and Payson was just about to follow when Sasha leaned in close.

"You said nothing about boys," he whispered in her ear.

Payson shivered as his breath hit her ear. She smiled, but didn't say anything. She followed her friends into the fitness center.

"Wow, he's hot," Maya whispered and smiled as Payson caught up with them.

.:.

It took way longer to test the gymnasts than Payson thought it would. They first tested the gymnasts on a stationary bike, and then after an hour or so of resting, they tested them again on a treadmill. The assignment was to compare the outcomes.

"I think it would have been easier if they weren't so fit," Derek said as he monitored the pulse of one of the elite girls on the stationary bike.

"I'm not sure," Payson said, adding the data from her pad to the laptop they had set up in the fitness center. The numbers were swimming in her head and she had to check them both two and three times before writing anything down. She felt exhausted, and yet she hadn't been the one on the treadmill or the stationary bike.

"More coffee?" Sasha suddenly asked from the doorway. He had spent more time in the fitness center than down in the gym.

"I think my head would explode if I drank any more coffee," Derek said.

"Lightweight," Sasha whispered to Payson as he filled her mug up. "So, how's it going? Getting any results?"

"You've got some fit gymnasts," Maya said.

"Were you as fit, Payson? We should test you!" Eric said.

"Yes, let's test you," Derek agreed. "Imagine the bonus points, how fit is an Olympic gold medalist five years later!"

"We're not testing me," Payson said. "I'll go get some more water for the gymnasts." She took the empty bottles and threw them in the recycling bin on the way to the kitchen.

"They like you," Sasha said behind her as she walked into the kitchen.

"What? Who?" Payson asked, getting a few water bottles from the fridge.

"Dumb and dumber," Sasha said.

Payson rolled her eyes, but with her back to her former coach. "Huh, maybe I should make a move on one of them?"

"You owe me dinner!" Sasha called after her.

"And you owe me some explanations!" she called back.

A jealous Sasha was rather fun to be around, she thought as she rejoined her study group. She would make sure to use that knowledge at later occasions.

.:.

It was past five o'clock when Payson said good bye to her friends. She was exhausted, and yet all the work wasn't done. They would meet up in the library several days after classes the coming week to start analyzing the data and writing the report.

The gym was surprisingly quiet. Only Becca and Sasha were still there. Becca was sitting on a pile of mattresses doing homework and Sasha was in the office.

"You ready to go?" she asked, leaning into the office. If she walked too far in she would only see the big pile of her papers on the table in front of the sofa and feel obligated to do some work before leaving.

"Sure," Sasha said, closing the folders with papers he had been working on. "I helped Becca with some math assignment before, you better look through it, I'm afraid I tricked her or something."

"Math was never my strongest subject," Payson said, leaning against the door way.

"What are you talking about? I got all your grades in report cards from the home schooling program, you always had straight A's."

"Fine, it wasn't my favorite subject then."

"Which are two completely different things," Sasha pointed out with an annoyingly smug smile.

"Becca!" Payson called out. "We're leaving!"

"Coming," Becca said, getting up on her feet. Payson saw that her sister had already showered and changed, which meant they had been done with training for a while.

"You could have gone home," Payson said, feeling guilty for making her sister stay late in the gym on a Saturday.

"It's okay," Becca said. "I got some homework done." They remained standing by the door, waiting for Sasha to join them. "Some of the other kids are going out for lunch together tomorrow, can I join them?" she asked, looking up from the phone she was texting on. "We all have a math test next week and we thought we would do some studying together."

"Sure," Payson said with a shrug. Lunches was good. Nothing too bad could happen at a lunch, right? "Sounds like a good idea. I'll probably spend tomorrow studying as well."

"Okay, I'm ready," Sasha said, turning the lights off.

.:.

While Becca set the table and then disappeared into her room to do "homework", Sasha and Payson cooked pasta carbonara. Or Payson tried to teach Sasha how to cook, but he wasn't very interested in learning.

"You should watch what I'm doing," Payson said, gently slapping Sasha's arm. All he was doing was to sit on the counter, drinking wine.

"I am watching you," he smiled.

Payson slapped his arm again but took a sip from her own wine to hide a smile. She moved the bacon around in the frying pan to occupy herself. She had so many questions she still wanted to ask, but with Becca in the next room, it really wasn't the time for it. She sneaked a glance at him and smiled as she saw him still watching her.

"Derek told me about a nice restaurant not far from campus, maybe we could go one day?" Payson asked. They needed neutral ground if they wanted to get any talking down, so if she had to take the first step to ask him out, she would do it, because they needed to talk.

"Did he tell you about it while asking you out?" he asked, a teasing smile on his face.

"Maybe," Payson smiled back. The truth was that he probably had, but she had interrupted him before any damage could be done to their study group.

"I never liked that guy," Sasha said, he mumbled something Payson was pretty sure she didn't want to hear.

"So, what about the restaurant, dinner this week?"

"Of course, how about Wednesday?" he said. When she nodded he smiled and waved her closer. "Come here," he whispered.

She moved closer, butterflies waking to life in her stomach. "Why?" she asked.

He gently pulled her the last part until she was standing between his knees. "Closer," he whispered and slowly lifted her face so they were looking at each other. Before she knew what was going on, he closed the distance and kissed her. There were no hesitation in the kiss, his lips soft but firm. Before Payson could really enjoy it, he leaned back and broke the kiss to look her in the eyes. "Remember that next time you're studying with dumb and dumber."

"I'll try, I might need some more though," Payson whispered and took a fast grip of his shirt, pulling him closer, demanding more.

.:.

A/N: Not every chapter will be so focused on Payson in school. In the next one we will see more of Kelly. And the one after that will be very focused on Sasha and Payson, and will hopefully offer some explantations you've been waiting for. I will try to be quicker with my next update to make up for this long wait.

As always, let me know what you think :)


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: As promised, the next chapter.

Monday Payson only had one class at nine, and then the next one at four. Most of the people in her class would spend the time in between at the library, working on the essays or the group project. But as soon as the class ended, Payson hurried to the subway. She had to change trains twice, but she made it almost in time to the clinic Kelly had given her the address to.

"Sorry I'm late," Payson said and hugged her friend. Even though it had been only a week since she had last seen Kelly, Payson could actually see that her friends stomach had grown.

"No worries," Kelly said and they walked inside. "You didn't have to come, I can go to a doctors appointment by my self you know."

"I know, but Austin asked me so I came," Payson said. "I think he was feeling very guilty over choosing work and not coming with you today."

"He's such a fool," Kelly sighed as they waited for their turn to speak to the woman in the reception desk.

"A very cute fool," Payson agreed. But she understood Austin. Today two officials from the NGO would be at the gym to oversee the two junior national team members practice, of course he didn't want to miss that. And he always wanted to be there for Kelly, so of course he wanted to be there for her as well. The compromise was that Payson stepped in as an Austin-temp.

Kelly was asked to sit down and wait for the doctor, apparently they were behind on the schedule. Payson got a cup off coffee from the machine in the waiting room and took a cup of hot chocolate for Kelly.

"So how's work going?" Payson asked. "Not stressing too much I hope."

"It's okay actually. I've hired a woman who'll take over after me while I'm out having the baby and everything, so she's already taking a load off my plate."

"That sounds good," Payson said, feeling relived, now maybe she wouldn't need to worry as much for her best friend.

"How's it going with Sasha?" Kelly asked, sipping the hot chocolate.

"I'm not sure," Payson sighed. "I mean kissing him is fantastic, but it's not enough, you know?"

Kelly nodded. "You need to talk to him."

Payson sighed again. She knew. "We're meeting up just the two of us for dinner on Wednesday. Hopefully we'll have some time to talk then." They really needed to talk about what was happening. Like Payson told Kelly, kissing him, having the physical part, it was good, but not enough. Not when it came to Sasha. She'd had no problem having "relationships" focused on the physical aspect of life. She had never had a one night stand, or anything like that. But for example; Tim in LA hadn't been much more than a few dates and a few very wild and exciting nights. It had been fun, but she could not do that with Sasha. She could not just have a part of him, to then have it all be taken away. She would not survive that. She wanted all or him.

"Kelly Parker?"

Both Kelly and Payson rose and greeted the woman who called Kelly's name. They were showed to an examination room where Kelly was asked to lie down until the ob/gyn came.

"Are going to find out the sex of the baby?" Payson asked. It was so hard to imagine there actually being a person inside Kelly's stomach. It was surreal somehow.

Kelly shook her head. "It doesn't matter what it is, as long as it's healthy," she said, one hand placed over the stomach.

"How about dinner this weekend?" Payson asked. "Becca complained over not having seen you since new years. I think she's worried you're disappointed in her after the kissing thing. She really idolizes you."

Kelly smiled fondly. "We can do dinner, and she's always welcome to come visit, she knows that. And I would never be disappointed in her, I really hope she knows that." Kelly shook her head. "Talking about that kiss, how's things going?"

"I had what could have been the most awkward sex talk in history of mankind with her," Payson said, feeling embarrassed just thinking about it.

Kelly laughed so hard her stomach looked like it was jumping. "Just as you know, I'll be on her side on this one," she said as she calmed down. "I think she needs it. If you hadn't been the responsible one now, you would have been on her side, right?"

Payson nodded. Before her parents' accident, she would have been on Becca's side. Becca would have called her in LA and they would have gossiped about how dreamy Jason was. Payson missed that, being sister.

"Thank you," Payson said. "For being there for Becca."

"Of course," Kelly said. "I'll..."

They both fell silent and turned to the door as a woman in her fifties entered. The woman had black hair twisted into a bun on the top of her head and a white coat on.

"Hello Kelly," the woman said, shaking Kelly's hand. "It's good to see you again. How are you doing."

"Good, thanks, Dr. Rosewood." Kelly said.

"We'll start by taking your blood pressure and then we'll do the ultrasound, how does that sound?"

Payson listened the doctor and Kelly talking. This wasn't Kelly's first check up and it certainty wasn't the doctors first, so she felt relaxed.

After taking Kelly's blood pressure, Dr. Rosewood looked twice in the papers in Kelly's chart.

"Is everything okay?" Kelly asked.

"Your blood pressure is slightly higher than last time," she wrote something on one of the papers. "We'll check it again after the ultrasound."

Payson felt her own blood pressure rise. What did high blood pressure mean? It wasn't good, that's for sure. It felt like everything medical she had ever learned had just disappeared out of her head. She remember when her dad got high blood pressure. He had to eat medicine and her mom had forced him to eat only healthy food. Now Payson knew that exercise would have been better than medicine, but she could not remember about high blood pressure in pregnant women. It was called something. Something she should know.

"The baby looks really healthy," Dr. Rosewood said, interrupting Payson's wandering mind. "A little higher heart frequency than last time, but nothing worrying." she wiped the blue gel of Kelly's stomach before focusing on the band around Kelly's arm again. The silence in the room could have been cut with a knife. Payson looked at her friend. Kelly looked worried.

"Your blood pressure is a bit high," Dr. Rosewood finally said. "Just to be on the safe side, I would like for you to go to the maternity ward at the hospital. They'll take some blood and urine samples to make sure that everything is okay. You might be able to go home tonight, or they might want to keep you for observation. Do you have any questions?"

Payson had a million questions, but no one she wanted to voice in front of Kelly.

"Do you have a car here?"

Both Payson and Kelly shook their heads.

"Then I'll ask Gabriella to call a cab. You just sit down in the waiting room and someone will come and get you. Okay? You don't need to worry, this happens every week here," the doctor smiled before leaving the room.

Payson helped Kelly up and together they walked out to the waiting room, sitting down close to the front doors to wait for the cab.

"You should call Austin," Payson whispered, taking Kelly's hand. "I'm sure nothing is wrong, but he should meet us at the hospital."

"I'll call when I know what's going on," Kelly said. "Do you have time to go with me? When's your next class?"

"It got canceled," Payson lied. "I've got all day."

A taxi driver entered the clinic and both Kelly and Payson watched him speak with the receptionist before coming over to them. Even though Kelly didn't need any help, Payson stayed close to her friend.

.:.

_How did the appointment go? Kelly never called._ Payson read the text from Austin again. Kelly was sleeping in a hospital bed next to her. She had met a doctor as soon as they got here. She has gotten her blood pressure measures again, they had taken both blood and urine samples and done an other ultrasound. These doctors also said that the baby looked fine, perfect even. Now they waited on the test results before they could get any answers. The doctor had said it would probably be an other hour or so. And Kelly would have to at least spend the night for observation because the blood pressure was so high. Depending on the other tests she could be forced to stay longer. They suspected that Kelly had pre-eclampsia.

Suddenly the phone started vibrating in her hand. Austin's face and name was blinking on the screen. She got up and left the room, carefully not to wake Kelly up.

"Hey, everything okay?" was the first thing Austin said as Payson answered the phone. She took a calming breath.

"I don't want you to worry," she said, practically hearing Austin stop breathing on the other end. "When we were at the clinic they saw that she had high blood pressure, so even though it's nothing to worry about now, they told us to go to the hospital so we took a cab here."

"Payson, if they tell you to go to the hospital, there's always something to worry about."

Payson agreed, of course there were a million things to worry about, but she didn't want to let her friends know she was worrying.

"I'll be there in half an hour," Austin said.

"She'll have to stay the night," Payson said. "Maybe you can bring some things? Otherwise I can do it later."

They said their good byes and Payson took the opportunity to find a cup of coffee and sending a text to Maya that she couldn't make it to the last class of the day. She then carefully sneaked into Kelly's room again.

"Did you call Austin?" Kelly asked, making Payson jump. She had thought Kelly was still asleep.

"He called me," Payson clarified. "He's on his way over."

"Thanks," Kelly smiled a weak smile.

Payson sat down at the chair next to Kelly's bed. She didn't know what to say to calm her friend. She wanted to say that everything would be okay, but she couldn't promise that.

"Do you want anything?" Payson asked instead.

"I'm not handicapped Pay. I'm allowed up and could get something if I wanted it."

Payson smiled. It must be a good sign that Kelly was still herself. "Yes, but the doctor told you to rest, which means you can boss people around without feeling bad."

Kelly smiled. "And believe me I will."

Payson somehow doubted it.

.:.

"It's called pre-eclampsia. It basically means you've got too high blood pressure and protein in your urine."

"What does it mean for the baby?" Kelly asked, both hands protectively over her stomach.

"Right now, not much. If it stays at this level. You'll most probably be able to carry this baby full term and have a natural delivery. We're going to keep you for three days to make sure you're stabile. Then you can go home."

"Am I on bed rest?"

"No," the doctor smiled. "Not now anyway. You need to rest a lot, no stress or heavy physical activity. You're going to have to leave blood and urine samples every week and have your blood pressure taken as well."

"Thank you so much doctor," Kelly smiled. Payson could see the relief on her friends face.

"I'll see you at rounds this evening."

The doctor disappeared and Payson couldn't keep a giant smile of her face. She hugged her best friend who had tears in her eyes.

Kelly leaned back with a sigh. "Why's all this happening to me? Aren't we supposed to become parents?"

"Don't think like that Kelly. It's bad luck, but you'll get through it."

A soft knock on the door and then Austin entered. He was by Kelly's side within a second, hugging her tightly. Payson moved away from the chair next to the bed and gave Kelly and Austin some privacy by looking out through the window.

"Thanks for coming with Kelly," Austin said, walking up to hug Payson as well. "Don't you have a class soon?" Austin asked.

Payson checked the time on her phone. It was already past three o'clock. "At four," she said.

"I thought it was canceled," Kelly said.

"Well," Payson had forgotten about the white lie. She shrugged. "I guess I got confused."

"Confused my ass," Kelly sighed. "You better go so you're not too late."

"Are you both okay? Do you need anything?" she asked her friends, but they shook their heads. "You sure?"

"Go, I'll call tonight," Austin said, pushing her towards the door laughing.

"Listen to the doctors Kelly!" Payson called over Austin's shoulder before leaving. She walked quickly through the hospitals corridors, and as soon as she was outside she started to jog.

.:.

She got to class just in time for it to start. It was a very interesting lecture and on her way home she went by the library to borrow some books. So it was almost six o'clock as she walked off campus. She hadn't gotten any texts from Becca that day, so she decided on walking by the gym before heading home, in case she was staying late again. And to see if Sasha was still there.

When she came to the gym it was dark and empty except a light in the office. She walked over and knocked on the door before entering. Sasha looked up from behind the computer and she saw a smile grow as he saw that it was her.

"Hi," she said. "Am I disturbing?"

"Never," he said and got up from the chair.

Payson leaned back against the doorway, letting Sasha walk closer to close the distance between them. "Kelly is fine," Payson said as Sasha was just inches away from her.

Sasha nodded. "Austin texted me," he said. "How are you?" he asked.

"Exhausted," she said truthfully. She thought about Becca already being back home, not knowing what happened to Kelly. She had asked Austin to not worry Becca, not on a day when the NGO was there. So now the pleasant task of deliver the news that Kelly was once again at the hospital fell on Payson. She was not looking forward to it, but she guessed it had to be done. "I should go," she said. Kelly would be fine, that's what she would have to remember, and she would tell Becca that first.

Sasha nodded as she turned to leave the office. She walked down the stairs and headed toward the doors. "Payson?" he called behind her. "Why did you come?"

She turned and looked into his blue eyes. "I just needed to see you, hear your voice," she said.

Once again he closed the distance between them, and soon she was pulled into his strong arms. She let the warmth from his body warm her up, and for the first time that day she relaxed. She felt safe in his arms.

.:.

A/N: I'm sorry for once again making Kelly sick. I didn't mean to, it just happened. During the summers I (in addition to the surgical ward) cover the maternity ward as well (I'm a physical therapist at a small hospital, if I haven't told you) and I've seen so many pregnancy complications lately, so I guess it just seeped into my mind. She'll be okay though, I can tell you that much.

Next chapter will be focused on Payson and Sasha. After that chapter I hope you'll feel like you've gotten some explanations to why the character has behaved like they have.


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: This is a long chapter, and it'll be very focused on Payson and Sasha :)

With everything that had happened in the beginning of the week, Payson and Sasha's dinner plans for Wednesday evening was canceled. Payson spent the week going between school, the hospital, the gym and the apartment, with pretty much no time to even sit down and breathe. On Thursday Kelly was finally allowed home from the hospital and things started to return to normal.

"Hanna invited me to a sleepover tonight, can I go?" Becca asked Friday morning, coming into Payson's room as she was getting ready for a day with two oral presentations in school. She had changed clothes five times, trying to figure out which outfit would give her the most professional look.

"Yeah, sure," Payson said. She had spoken to Hanna's mother Grace enough times to have decided that it seemed like an okay family. And Hanna was always nice when Payson met her.

"Thank you," Becca said, disappearing again. "Take the grey suit!" she called on the way to the kitchen.

Payson looked at the grey suit and white shirt she had placed on the bed. Becca always had a better fashion sense than her, she trusted her younger sister. But before changing, she reached for her phone, still charging on the bedside table. _Becca's sleeping at a friends. Wanna do something tonight?_ She sent the text quickly to not change her mind. She changed out of the black jeans and shirt she had tried on. After getting the grey pants on, her phone vibrated with an answer from Sasha. She threw herself at the phone, reading the answer five times before letting herself smile._ Bring a leo, we can train and then head over to my place. Have a good day._

She almost wished she had one of her old leo's, but she wouldn't fit in it anyway. She had a slightly different body shape now compared to when she competed in London. So instead she pulled out a top, sports bra and a pair of shorts out of her wardrobe. Not being able to fit it into her bag, she had to change into an oversized purse to fit everything. In the bathroom, she hesitated when she spotted her toothbrush. She stared at it, then quickly put it in her purse. She stared at herself in the mirror for a moment, then put it back in the glass on the sink.

"You're so silly," she told her own reflection in the mirror. She then reached for the toothbrush, but changed her mind before reaching it.

"The coffee is ready, are you coming Pay?"

Payson jumped and snatched the toothbrush from the glass before leaving the bathroom. "Coming," she said.

.:.

Having the first two presentations at NYU done was a great feeling. She had gotten quite good comments from both of the Professors, so she felt confident that she had passed. It was with light feet she walked to the gym. Inside the gym several different levels of gymnasts were training around the gym, she couldn't spot the elite girls.

"Hi, where's the elites?" Payson ask, walking up next to Sasha.

"Hi," he smiled. "They're doing your strengthening program in the annex with Sonia."

"Cool, send them in to me when they're done so I can ask them what they thought about it."

Sasha nodded and Payson headed over to the office. She had so much work to do with the programs and the workout plans and schedules Sasha had asked her to go over. She hadn't gotten much done the last few days, so she thought it was best to get started on it now. She took the folders from the shelf and sat down in the sofa, she had no idea where to start.

.:.

"You look very good today," Sasha suddenly said from the doorway.

Payson had kicked the heels off a couple of hours ago, her jacket was spread over a chair and she had pulled her hand through her hair one too many times for it to look good. So she didn't believe him.

"The gymnasts are gone, do you want to do some training?"

"I thought you said you would send them in," Payson said, starting to put away the papers and books spread out in front of her.

"Well, they weren't too happy with you. I heard words like dead abs, puking and just wanting to die, so I thought it was a hit."

Payson laughed and got up from the sofa. "I'll go change," she said.

After changing into the workout clothes she made her way out to the gym again. Sasha was waiting on the floor, dressed in nothing but sweatpants that hung very low on his hips. She gave herself a moment to stare before making her presence known.

"I thought I said leo," Sasha said with a smirk.

"Sorry to disappoint you," Payson said. She didn't wait for him to say anything else, instead she started warming up.

.:.

After a couple of hours both Payson and Sasha was panting, laying exhausted on the floor. Payson really was out of shape, she would have to kick the training up a gear. Without saying too much they went into separate changing rooms and Payson took a long shower before changing into her suit again. She wished she had bought something else to wear, but since she hadn't she was stuck with the fancy clothes.

"Ready to leave?" she asked, sticking her head into the office where Sasha was sitting on the sofa, waiting for her with a thoughtful face.

"Sure,' he said, getting up and smiling to her. Sasha locked up the gym and together they walked out to his car. Sasha lived not far from the gym. It wasn't as short commute as he'd had in Boulder, living on the parking lot, but it wasn't bad for being New York City.

"Would you like something more comfortable to wear?" he asked as they got inside his apartment.

"Yes please," she said, stepping out of her heels. He disappeared into his bedroom and came back with a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. She gratefully accepted the clothes and went into the bathroom to change. The clothes were much too big for her. Even thought she folded the hem at her waist several times, and rolled up the pants by her feet, it looked like she was drowning in them. With the t-shirt? It wasn't exactly clothes for a romantic evening.

Sasha laughed as she walked into the living room where he was setting up the table with the food they had brought with them from the Greek restaurant just down the street.

"Do you want some wine?" Sasha asked, holding up a bottle.

She nodded. She could use some alcohol in her system if they were actually going to do some talking. But first they were going to eat. She sat down next to Sasha on the sofa, her heart was pounding and she could feel the electricity between their bodies even though they weren't touching.

.:.

After the wonderful dinner Payson was wandering around the living room. She came to a stop by the stereo. Behind her Sasha was putting away the dishes. She saw that a Snow Patrol CD was in the stereo and she pressed play.

_If you were here beside me, instead of in New York. _

_If the curve of you was curved on me, I'd tell you that I loved you. _

_Before I ever knew you, cause I loved the simple thought of you. _

_If our hearts are never broken, Well there's no joy in the mending. _

_There's so much this hurting can teach us both. _

_Though there's distance and there's silence, your words have never left me. _

_They're the prayer that I say every day. _

When Payson heard Sasha behind her she wiped away a tear from her cheek. She hadn't even noticed she was crying. She already had goosebumps, but when she felt Sasha slowly move her hair away from her neck, letting his finger barely touch her skin, she shivered. Turning around she saw that the song was making him emotional as well. He wiped an other tear from her cheek.

"I'm sorry Payson," he whispered, kissing her cheek where the tear had been moments before.

She felt silly for the tears, but ignored it. "You've nothing to apologize for," she said. A whisper was all her voice could manage without cracking.

"Let's sit," he said, leading her to the sofa. In the background the music kept playing.

"Can you tell me just one thing?" Payson looked over at the British man, there were so many answers she needed. Desperately needed. "Why did you turn me away twice, and then changed your mind?"

They looked at each other for what felt like eternity. He was studying her so intensively that her skin felt like it was on fire. She wanted him to reach out and touch her, but she didn't do anything about it herself. She just watched him watching her. Finally, minutes after she asked the question, he took a deep breath and started talking.

"When we spent all that time together, working on your floor routine... I didn't realize I had fallen for you until you kissed me. I was so close to give in to it," he spoke his head. "I had my hands on your waist and your lips against mine... god I wanted to kiss you back."

"So why didn't you?" she whispered.

"You know why Payson," Sasha said, looking pained. "We couldn't have had anything together at the time. All I could be for you then was your coach, and a friend. I was so desperate to be your friend. But you were 17 and I 27... It was just so wrong, what I was feeling for you. A coach shouldn't feel like that for one of his adepts. So I left. Both because I wanted to protect you, from myself and from the NGO, the media... But also because I couldn't stand living with myself, I felt like a child molester..."

"You..." Payson wanted to reassure Sasha she had felt the same, that he had never done anything wrong, but he didn't let her continue.

"Let me finish, please," he said and she quickly nodded. "When you showed up in Romania... It was like waking up from a nightmare to realize real life was worse, and in it I were the monster. Your tears... Your words..." he shook his head again. "I never wanted to hurt you. All I ever did was with your best in mind."

"You knew how I felt, why didn't you let me know after the Olympics? I was over 18, done with gymnastics..." she trailed off.

"And with that BMXer," Sasha said with a small smile. "And I promised your father."

"My dad?" Payson asked, her heart fell.

"At Olympic trials, at TC... We spoke afterwards. He told me he knew what I felt for you... And he asked me not to take the first step. He said you would have a simpler life with someone like Rigo, and he was right. What could I say to counter that? So I agreed. I would never have taken a first step, so I promised your father I would make sure you had a chance at a normal life..."

Through her watery eyes she saw a tear fall down Sasha's cheek. She reached over and wiped it away. "I know... Knew my parents, Sasha. They wanted what was best for me. If they could see me now. See us, they would be happy for us. I know it in my heart Sasha, they would approve of you... Not only approve, they would be glad it's you who I love."

The small smile on Sasha's face was probably the saddest thing she had ever seen in her life, she couldn't stop more tears to fall. "I love you so much Payson," he whispered and leaned in and kissed her briefly.

"So that's why you said no when I came to California?" Payson asked.

He nodded. "That and I was just selfish enough to not be able to stand seeing you with an other guy while I couldn't have you... I remember your mom mentioning some guys when we spoke during the years... I just wanted to rip them apart."

Payson smiled a little. "So how come you changed your mind?"

"Kelly called me.." Sasha began.

"Kelly what?" Payson asked, surprised. It was more Austin's style to butt in where he shouldn't.

"She called, and wasn't very happy with me. She was almost scary, calling me out on feelings I hadn't told anyone I had... When she said you didn't care if I loved you back, that you just needed me, friend and coach, it felt like my heart would actually break... At the same moment as I hung up, or she slammed the phone in my ear, that song, New York, came on... I..." he shook his head. "I changed my mind and packed a bag. I was on a flight to New York the same evening."

It was all sounding too good to be true. It started to sound like one of Payson's many dreams. She was still afraid to hope too much. Nobody has ever hurt her like he had, leaving her behind like that.

"I'm in love with you Sasha, but I can't do this playing around," tears started falling again. "I can't stand being rejected over and over. Just tell me if you want to do this... I..."

"I love you Payson, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, if you'll let me."

It felt like a stone fell from her chest as he reached out and touched her cheek, wiping them dry with his thumbs. He then pulled her into a hug and held her close. She could hear his heart beat slowly and steadily through his chest. She matched his calm deep breaths and for the first time during their conversation she felt herself calm down and relax.

"Can I ask you something more?" Payson asked, not leaving the warmth of Sasha's embrace.

"You can ask me anything Payson," his voice made his chest vibrate against her ear.

"How did you know about that party? Back in Boulder?" she looked up at him.

He laughed and squeezed her harder to his chest. "I'm not giving all my secrets away tonight," he kissed her forehead once.

She looked up and he kissed her cheek before moving on to her lips. She moved so that she was sitting across his legs, facing him. He pulled her as close as possible with his hands moving between her lover back and thighs. She moved her hands through his hair and slowly moved her hips against his. A moan escaped his mouth and Payson couldn't help smiling into the kiss.

.:.

The following morning Payson slowly woke up to a sunny room and Sasha watching her. She smiled at the sight of him, how many times hadn't she dreamed about waking up next to him?

"What are you thinking?" he asked, handing her ha cup of hot coffee. She sat up, leaning against the wall, never looking away from Sasha. She was afraid she would suddenly wake up and realize it was all a dream.

"Just about last night," she said, sipping the coffee.

"Any regrets?" he asked, voice low.

"Never," she said quickly. "You?"

He shook his head with a smile. "If I could decide, this moment would last forever, but I have to be in the gym in twenty minutes, so I need to leave."

"Oh," Payson said, she hadn't realized what time it was. "I'll hurry," she said, starting to get up.

"Don't stress, you stay," he said. "There's a key on the table in the kitchen. I'll see you later?" he rose.

She nodded but waved for him to lean in closer. As he did, she grabbed his shirt and pulled him down to her level and kissed him.

"Good morning," she whispered and then kissed him again. "And see you later."

He laughed and kissed her a last time. "See you in the gym."

Payson spent an other half an hour in bed, drinking coffee and slowly letting what had happened sunk in. The covers around her smelled like Sasha, which made it easier to realize she wasn't just making it up in her head.

After finishing the coffee she had to force herself to leave the wonderful bed. She borrowed Sasha's shirt from the previous night and walked into the kitchen. Everything around her felt different, lighter and brighter somehow. She sat down at the table for a moment, looking around. She was afraid to let her thoughts wander too far into her imagination.

She took a few grapes from the bowl on the table and got up. She needed to get to the gym. She had work to do as well.

But she didn't come longer than to her clothes on the floor in the bedroom. She couldn't arrive to the gym in the same clothes as yesterday, people would notice. So instead she pulled on her workout clothes that she found in her purse. She was glad to find the toothbrush, and hurried into the bathroom again.

.:.

Walking into the gym her eyes found Sasha's right away. He smiled a little before going back to focusing on the gymnast on the beam in front of him.

"Austin!" she waved to him and he came jogging over. "How's Kelly?" she asked and hugged him.

"She's good. Maybe not her mood, but I think she's putting up an act. She's mostly relived to be home. She wanted for you and Becca to come over for lunch tomorrow, if you feel like it."

"Of course," she said. She hadn't seen Kelly since Thursday, when she got to leave the hospital. Kelly was now on strict orders to not work and to rest a lot. "We'll be there."

"So, is Becca looking forward to her first trip to TC?" Austin asked.

"TC?" Payson asked, that was the first she ever heard of it.

"Next weekend, she's supposed to be there Thursday through Sunday," Austin explained.

"But that's only a week before Nationals. Wouldn't it be better for them to be with their club coaches?" Payson asked.

"Coach McIntyre said that since Nationals isn't their primary goal, Junior Worlds in a month is, so it's a good time for the team to meet."

Payson nodded. She knew her sister was looking forward to compete at Nationals, and Sasha had told her she had a chance for event finals on both floor and uneven bars. Maybe taking the pressure off the situation would help. Payson had always enjoyed being at TC, but she had missed having her real coach with her. Payson and McIntyre hadn't really agreed on her chances for individual golds, and Payson had been very happy to shut him up with some very impressive routines first at tryouts and then in London.

"Well, I should get some work done," Payson said.

She had promised Sasha she would do a explosivity workout with the junior boys and girls that afternoon. She would test out a program she had designed by reading a study about track and field athletes and their explosivity training. There had also been a study about dancers, gymnasts and figure skaters she had used. It was very interesting, reading about the effects of things, and the risk of injuries and how to prevent it.

But that was after lunch, so she went into the office and got her iPad out of her purse. She had an e-book about sports injuries of the foot to read before class on Monday.

.:.

"I come bearing coffee," Sasha suddenly said from the door, causing Payson to look up from the sofa where she was half lying, still reading and taking notes from the book.

"How very nice of you," Payson smiled and sat up, Sasha sat down next to her.

They hadn't talked about PDA, so Payson let her fingers gentry touch his as she took the cup from him, but otherwise she didn't surrender to her pounding heart which wanted to lean over and kiss him. This was work, she told herself, they needed to be professional. She reached for her purse and got the key to his apartment and held it out to him.

Sasha looked from the key to her eyes. "Keep it," he said and closed her hand around the key.

"Isn't that a little early?" she said with a smile, but she took the key and put it on her key chain.

"Or late, depending how you see it," he smiled as well.

"I heard that Becca is going to TC in Colorado Springs next week, are you going as well?"

He shook his head, smile growing bigger. She laughed and bit her lip.

"Can't wait to spend an entire weekend with you," Sasha leaned closer and whispered, his breath against her ear made her shiver. She turned her head and placed a quick kiss on his lips, all thought of professionalism already forgotten.

"Now I need to study, go," she gently pushed him away.

.:.

Sunday morning Payson slept in. She had always loved Sunday's. Growing up it was always the only training free day, and even if she loved gymnastics, it was something special about a deserved day off. After finally making her way out of bed, she got dressed in a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt before heading out to the kitchen. She started the coffee maker and jumped up to sit on the counter. She got her phone out from her pocket and opened the wordfeud game she was playing against Kelly. Kelly was in the lead by five points, but Payson had some really good letters.

"Morning," Becca said with a yawn, entering the kitchen.

"Good morning," Payson said. "Caught up on the sleep you missed at the sleepover?"

"I think so," Becca said. "But it was worth it," she smiled. Becca had told her about the sleepover the previous night. Apparently they had been five girls there, playing games like truth or dare all night. Payson remember those sleepovers, she had spent plenty of them with Lauren and Kaylie.

"So, I thought we would take the subway to Kelly and Austin as soon as we're ready," Payson said, pouring the just finished coffee in two mugs and handing one of them to her sister.

"Okay," Becca said. "I'll just finish the coffee, then I'll take a shower."

"Me too," Payson said, "We don't need to hurry."

.:.

When Payson and Becca arrived to Kelly and Austin's apartment, they were met by an Austin in a apron and Kelly half lying on the sofa. After saying hi to Kelly she offered to help Austin in the kitchen.

"No, no. I've got it all under control," Austin said and disappeared into the kitchen.

"His food will either be delicious, or inedible. We'll just have to wait and see," Kelly said with a smile. "How are you, tell me everything that has happened lately!"

"We are good, how are you?" Payson asked, it was so typical Kelly to talk about anything else than herself.

"I feel fine, but I did before the doctors appointment as well, so I'm resting a lot," she said with a sigh. "It's boring as hell, I really don't understand couch-potatoes..."

Payson pulled out a pile of magazines she had bought for Kelly and handed them to her friend. "Something to pass the time with," she said.

"Thank you," Kelly said, placing the magazines on the table. "So how are you doing? Have you seen that cute boy again?" she asked Becca.

Payson saw her sister look at her, hesitating. "I think I'll go supervise Austin," Payson said and rose. She heard both Kelly and Becca giggle as she walked into the kitchen.

"I don't need help!" Austin said, running between the stove and the counter.

"Then ignore me," Payson said and leaned against the counter. "Just giving Kelly and Becca some privacy to gossip about boys."

She watched Austin work in the kitchen, it actually looked like he knew what he was doing. Payson was impressed as she watched him finish up the pasta, pastas sauce and garlic bread. He even turned down her offer of helping setting the table.

"Will you let Kelly and Becca know the lunch is ready?" Austin asked.

"Finally something you trust me with," she said and got up from the table.

The lunch was delicious and Payson ended up eating way too much. Becca and Austin, energy fire-bolts as they always were, were quickly up and left the kitchen for playing on the Xbox kinect. Payson and Kelly remained in the kitchen, cleaning up.

"How's it going with school?" Kelly asked.

"Good, I think," Payson said.

"And working at the gym?"

"A bit hectic, but good," she had a feeling Kelly was beating around the bush. There were something else she wanted to ask.

"And things with Sasha?"

And there it were. She hesitated a little. They hadn't talked about what to say, whom they would tell. She bit her lip.

"Something happened?" Kelly asked, shining up. "You need to tell me!"

"You can't tell anyone, not even Austin. I'm not sure we're telling..." Kelly was practically squealing as Payson talked. "We... Had a talk, when Becca was away at the sleep over, we talked. It was good. I think we're on the same page now. I'm not sure what page yet, but it's at least the same one, which is a first."

"Is he your boyfriend?" she teased.

"We haven't really defined it..." Payson said with a smile. She felt like jumping around the kitchen, giggling with Kelly.

.:.

Sunday evening, as Payson crawled down in her empty and cold bed with her cellphone in one hand and journal in the other, she debated on whether or not to call Sasha. She could hear music coming from Becca's room, her sister would soon fall asleep. Payson would too, but her evening routine consisted of some journal writing before being able to fall asleep. Even if she liked technology, writing in her leather journal was still the best way to let go of everything that had happens during the day. She looked at her phone, to call or not to call. She didn't want to come across as clingy... Before she could make up her mind, her phone started vibrating in her hand.

"I was just thinking about you," she couldn't help smiling as she answered the phone.

"I was thinking about you too," Sasha said. "How was lunch with Kelly and Austin?"

"Very good. Austin actually cook's really well," Payson was still surprised over that. One of Austin's many career plans had been to open a restaurant, according to Kelly it had fallen through because he couldn't cook, or organize. She guessed the last part would be more of a problem...

"That I did not expect," Sasha said.

"So, Kelly asked something," Payson began.

"What?" Sasha asked when she fell quiet.

"She asked if you're my boyfriend..."

"Boyfriend, such a trivial word, but I guess it'll have to do."

She smiled. She was doodling in her journal, trying to keep her hands occupied. "So, we're not telling, right? It would be weird, don't you think?"

"Obviously you told Kelly," he said, there where nothing but laughter in his voice.

"Well, Kelly can read me like an open book, I had nothing to put against it," Payson defended herself. "Of course you can tell your friends, or family. I just thought about at the gym..."

"I understand what you mean," Sasha laughed. "Maybe it would restart old rumors and problems if we did," he said more seriously.

"You don't think media would be too interested, do you?" Payson asked, she hadn't thought about that. She wasn't his gymnast any more, she was older, more experienced. Would people still assume the worst of Sasha? Of her?

"Pay, we don't need to figure all this out today," Sasha said. "This is a conversation that can wait."

She nodded for herself, agreeing. "I guess we better sleep," she said, looking at the clock over her desk, it was soon midnight.

"Good night, girlfriend," he said, making the smile return to Payson's lips.

"Good night boyfriend," she whispered back, feeling only slightly foolish.

.:.

The days moved quickly, and soon it was Wednesday evening. Payson cut the study session at the library short and got home in time to make dinner for Becca. Her sister would leave for TC the following morning and they had agreed on packing together and then watch a movie.

Payson made salmon and potatoes, and just as she put the food on the table, with a salad and a cold sauce, Becca came through the door.

"How'd training go?" Payson asked her sister as she threw the bag on the floor and made her way over to the kitchen table. Payson knew her sister was worried about getting her beam routine ready for nationals. The time at TC would be more focused on the Junior Worlds rather than Nationals and she probably wouldn't get time for the fine adjustment she needed before a major competition.

"Okay, I think I'll get everything ready in time," she said, more focused on putting food on her plate than talking with Payson.

"Looking forward to TC?" Payson remembered her first time at TC, she hadn't been able to sleep for weeks before going there, she was so excited.

"I am, Sophia, from The Rock, made the team as an alternate, so it's going to be fun, seeing her again."

After finishing their dinner they moved into Becca's room. Payson got her small suitcase from her wardrobe an placed it on Becca's bed. Even though Becca packed herself, and had done so for years, she seemed to like to have Payson there for company and to make sure that she wouldn't forget anything.

Her sister would be gone for four days, but she started packing as if it was four weeks. Payson had to work hard to keep from laughing as she watched Becca trying to fit everything into the small suitcase.

"Maybe I need a bigger suitcase after all," Becca said with a sigh as she had to take one of her three pair of shoes out of the pile of things in the suitcase.

"Or maybe you don't need to pack as much," Payson said. "You're going to be there for four days, do you really need three pair of shoes, four counting the ones you're traveling in. And two jeans, one skirt and one dress? When are you going to wear all this? Most of the time you will be training!"

Becca sighed. Looking back, Becca was more similar to Lauren and Kaylie packing than Payson. Payson always packed her team bag first, to make sure she got all important gymnastics related thugs first. The suitcase came in second place. It wasn't as important if she forgot a pair of jeans , compared to as if she would have forgotten her favorite leo.

"Fine," Becca said, emptying the suitcase contents on the bed and starting over.

.:.

"Who are you texting?" Becca asked, causing Payson to jump. They were watching a horror movie and Payson had tried to be sneaky about texting Sasha. It was all they did, days at end, texting or calling.

"Maya, about the test next week," she lied smoothly. She hadn't told Becca yet. The telling or not telling question hadn't been answered yet. Payson knew she should tell her sister, but she didn't want things to be weird. Wouldn't it be weird to have your sister date your coach?

"What are you going to do this weekend?" Becca asked. They had both lost focus of the movie, it wasn't very good.

"Probably just studying, meeting up with my study group both tomorrow and Friday evening. Then I'll probably go see Kelly and Austin as well."

Becca nodded, it sounded like their normal weekend routine.

The phone vibrated in her hand and she looked down, an other text from Sasha. _I think you should stay the whole weekend, and thursday, friday. Don't care if you come late. Want to see you._

Payson smiled, but then quickly remembered her sister and put the phone away.

"Should we chose an other movie?" she asked.

Becca agreed. The Cabin in the Woods really wasn't a movie in their taste.

.:.

Payson almost ran from the subway and up the street to Sasha's apartment. They had been stuck in the library to study until eight and she was now dying to see Sasha. They hadn't seen each other in over a day. It was silly, she knew that. But she missed him.

She knocked on the door, out of breath. She didn't bother waiting for him, she unlocked the door and stepped inside. The whole apartment smelled wonderful. She took her jacked and wet shoes off in the hallway, closing and locking the door behind herself. She could hear the shower running in the bathroom, so she walked into the kitchen. In the oven she could see stuffed peppers, so he did know how to cook some food at least. That was a relief.

She jumped up on the counter to sit there, she pulled out her cellphone and saw that Becca had sent her a text. _Got here okay, sharing room with Sophia. First practice okay._

The girl of few words. She sent a text back, wishing her good luck for tomorrow and good night. She heard the shower stop and a couple of minutes later she heard Sasha exit the bathroom. She smiled as he entered the kitchen with a towel around his waist.

"Hey," she said.

He smiled. "Hi."

She motioned, with one finger, for him to come closer. When he was within reach she placed her hands on his shoulders, pulling him the last bit. His hair was still wet and she drew her hand through it before continuing down his chest. She loved his hair. Well, except for that weird phase he went through right before the Olympics, she wasn't too crazy about that length.

"I've missed you all week," she said.

"We've seen each other almost everyday," he smiled. He leaned in and kissed her jaw.

"That's not the same," she said, shivering as he continued leaving a trail of kisses down the side of her neck.

"It certainly wasn't," he smiled.

She leaned in, kissing him as she let her hands move across his muscular chest and abs.

"Ops," she said into the kiss as she happened to pull the towel away form his waist. He laughed and broke the kiss to help her off with her t-shirt.

"Tit for tat," he whispered.

"How are you then going to get me naked?" she asked. "You're already naked."

He lifted her up and she fastened the grip she had with her legs around his waist.

"I know a way," he said, carrying her into the bedroom. As he carried her, never braking the kiss, he also managed to get her bra off. Putting her down on the bed he threw the bra on the floor. Moving on to her pants, she willingly lifted her hips so he could pull them down.

"Isn't it wrong of us to have sex on the second date?" he laughed, kissing her again.

"Don't you dare stop now Belof," she panted as she broke the kiss.

.:.

"Do you smell smoke?" Payson whispered as she kind of woke to life. She had never felt more relaxed in her life.

"Bloody hell! The food!" he jumped out of the bed and ran into the kitchen. She could hear the accent getting thicker as he cursed.

She was just too... tired to get out of bed, so she waited for him to return. Which he did a couple of minutes later, carrying a bottle of wine and two glasses.

She reached her underwear and Sasha's shirt, putting them on under the cover, suddenly feeling shy.

"Hey, don't hide under there," Sasha said.

She pulled the t-shirt over her head and then sat up, facing him.

"How come you look so much better in my clothes than I do?" he asked with a smile.

"It's a gift I have," she smiled. "You couldn't save the food?" she asked.

He shook his head. "We can order something," he said. Payson realized it was only 9pm, it felt way later. "We could order pizza to celebrate that we're not at the TC, working our arses off."

"That's a cause well worth celebrating," she smiled.

Saha made the call while Payson tasted the wine. It tasted very nice, not that she was an expert or anything.

"I remember when that BMXer called me from TC," Sasha said after finishing the call.

"That was very nice of him," Payson smiled. "I think he regretted it later on though."

"Really? Why?"

Payson shook her head. She didn't want to tell him, it was kind of embarrassing, the amount of time she had been in love with him.

"I saw it at some kind of sign," Payson finally said as Sasha had just continued looking at her. "I thought it meant more than you just being my coach."

"It did," Sasha said. "I came back for you, not for any of the other girls. When he called, introducing himself as your boyfriend," he smiled half a smile. "It awoke something deep down inside me. I wanted to punch him. And he had you kissing in the gym instead of training, and the research you did at a club? I really wanted to punch him."

Payson smiled. It was nice, hearing it wasn't just her.

"I think that's how your father figured it out. Or maybe he knew... I wasn't going to tell you, or act on it anyway..."

"I wouldn't have minded some acting on it."

"I know. But I think this all turned out for the best," Sasha said. "I think we both needed some time apart to know it wasn't just the situation or setting, to realize it was for real."

Payson thought about the time they had spent apart. She had grown up a lot during the five years. Not only because of her parents dying. She had moved away from home, lived on her own, partied, studied. She had gotten her doze of normal life. "I actually agree with you," she said. She might always have been an old soul, but now she was also an adult.

.:.

A/N: I'm kind of overly excited to see if this chapter will bring me my 100th review :). As always, I love the support you have given me for this fic. You all keep me writing, which I'm so grateful for.

Next chapter will probably be up next weekend, sorry for the wait. I can tell you that hiding things for Becca will become complicated, and some of your wishes/predictions for that situation will come true. And some well known characters (both from this fic and from the show) will be back over the next few chapters. I hope you'll stick with me, and let me know what you think.


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: Thank you so much for all your reviews! I can't believe I passed hundred reviews with the last chapter. Your kind words means everything to me. You keep me motivated to write.

The weekend was over way too quickly for Payson and Sasha's liking. They spent most of the time in Sasha's apartment. Either in bed or curled up on the sofa. On Sunday morning Payson packed her things and they walked together back to the Keeler sister's apartment. Becca was coming back home the same evening, and Kelly and Austin would come over around the same time so they all could eat dinner together.

"Where do you want the mail?" Sasha asked, gathering the small pile from the doormat.

"Kitchen table is fine," Payson said, taking her coat off and hanging it up. She walked around the apartment to light the lamps. Even though it was the middle of the day, and the apartment had plenty big windows, it felt dark. Payson hated the winter and the dark that followed.

"Do you want something to eat?" Payson asked, looking into the fridge. She had planned on making lasagna for dinner, but that was still a few hours away. They would have to go to the airport to pick Becca up before starting dinner.

"Do you know what I think we should do?" Sasha asked, suddenly standing so close his breath brushed her ear.

"What?" she asked and turned around. He moved so close that she had to back up to still be able to see his face. She stepped back until she was against the kitchen counter. She bit her lip, looking up at what could very well be the sexiest person alive. His blue eyes were darker than usual.

He leaned down and kissed her. "I think we need to lie down," he said as they broke apart. "We need some _rest_."

"Fantastic idea," Payson said, putting her arms around his neck, their lips found their way together again. "We haven't rested enough this weekend." As she spoke Sasha continued kissing her, his lips wandered over her jaw, down her neck. He reached her collarbone before leaning back again.

"Come here," he whispered, lifting her up and carrying her to her bedroom.

.:.

"Hello? Payson? I'm home!"

Payson placed her hands on Sasha's chest, breaking away from the kiss. "Did I just hear...?"

"Are you home Pay?" the bedroom door opened as in slow-motion. Payson pushed Sasha of off her, but not fast enough. At the sight of Becca's wide eyes and surprised face, Payson pulled the cover over herself. Hoping to hide from the world.

"Oh, I'm sorry," the door closed again. "Sorry! I'll... you carry on... Or no, please don't! I don't wanna hear..."

Payson groaned, she wanted to die. God, how she wanted to disappear from the face of the earth. She lifted the cover to look at Sasha, he didn't look as horrified as he should, if anything, he looked slightly amused.

"This is so bad," she said, groaning again and pulling the cover back over her head.

"Come on Pay, it's not that bad..."

"Not that bad?" Payson asked, sitting up. She lowered her voice before continuing. "My sister just walked in on us having sex!" she whispered harshly.

"Oaky, I'm sorry," Sasha said, also sitting up. "It's not the best thing that could happen, but we can't do anything about it now. Come on, let's just ignore it and hope she'll forget all about it."

"This is going to end with Becca needing to see a therapist," Payson said and shook her head. She hoped she hadn't scarred her sister for life.

"Pay," Sasha said, taking her hand and waiting until Payson turned to look at him. "She'll tease you a bit, might use it against us a few times, but it'll be fine."

Payson knew Sasha was right. She took a deep breath, pulling her hair up in a ponytail. It wasn't like the world was ending.

Payson and Sasha got dressed as quickly as they could. Sasha had to more or less force Payson out of the room. Becca was in the living room, the TV was on, volume high. She wasn't watching it though, she was texting.

"You wont tell anyone, will you?" Payson asked, or more pleaded with her sister. "Because what you saw... We were just..." she could for her life not come up with one good reason to how they could have ended up in those positions, except the obvious.

"Having sex," Becca said with a shrug.

Payson felt her cheek redden. This was not happening. She took a deep breath. Her phone suddenly vibrated on the table in front of the sofa. She picked it up and saw that she had an old message from Becca. _We're flying home early, don't need to pick me up, Hanna's mom drives me._ Payson wished she had seen it abut earlier. The second, new, text she wished to never have seen. _Good work girl. Maybe need to plan it better though :p._ Her cheek couldn't be any redder.

"You told Kelly?" Payson asked her sister, not believing her eyes.

"It's our deal, no secrets," Becca smiled and sat down in the sofa, she was enjoying this far too much. "So Payson, have mom and dad talked with you about sex and stuff?"

"Becca!" Payson groaned.

"Why don't I start on the food? Give you some time..."

Payson turned and glared at Sasha, his answer was to smile and leave the living room very quickly. She would hold this against him, leaving her like this!

"I already knew you were together," Becca said, looking very pleased with herself.

"How?" was all Payson could say. She took a few calming breaths, willing her heart rate to decrease.

Becca shrugged. "It's so obvious. The way you look at each other, the way you talk... The fact that you had a crush on him forever."

Payson sat down in the sofa next to her sister. "I'm sorry we didn't tell you," she said.

"Why didn't you?" Becca asked, putting her phone away.

Payson looked toward the kitchen, the apartment was small, she knew Sasha could hear every word they said. "It's been kind of up and down for a while," she said. "We couldn't really figure it out... I didn't want things to be wired for you in the gym, that's why we'll keep it away from there."

"Most people already assume you're together," Becca said.

"What? Why?"

"If you google your name, the picture of you kissing Sasha, is one of the first hits."

"I won four Olympic golds and they remember me for kissing my coach?" Payson sighed. They would never be able to outlive the kiss-scandal.

"I'm happy for you," Becca said with a smile and a shrug.

Payson reached out and hugged her sister. "Thank you," she whispered. "We better go help Sasha with dinner before he manage to ruin it."

The Keeler sisters got up and walked into the kitchen where Sasha was chopping onions.

"And just to clarify," Becca said. "I really, really want you to stop having sex where I risk walking in on you again. And I hope you're using condoms!"

Payson couldn't help laughing. She pushed her sister, not too hard, and walked over to the fridge to start with the lasagna.

"And if you hurt my sister, I might need to, like, severely hurt you. Or something," Becca said, causing both Payson and Sasha to laugh harder. "I'm serious!" Becca said, pouting and crossing her arms over her chest.

.:.

Kelly and Austin arrived an hour later, just in time for dinner.

"So, how are things?" Kelly asked, barely able to contain her smile. Payson wanted to slap her for being so smug. She would have too, if her friend weren't pregnant in week 24.

"Things are good," Payson said, choosing to ignore her friends hints instead of physically hurting her. "Becca, how was TC?" They all walked into the kitchen and sat down at the already set table.

"It was good," Becca said. "I think coach McIntyre thought that some of us were too focused on nationals instead of worlds..." she rolled her eyes. "As if we can't focus on the competitions one at a time."

"When do you leave for Nationals?"

"We fly down to Miami on Wednesday," Sasha said, cutting up the lasagna in gigantic pieces and placing them on the plates.

"Are you coming with us?" Becca asked her sister.

"I'll fly down Friday afternoon, but I have classes the whole week before that," Payson said. She wished things very different. She had tried to get out of class, but both days was very important for the upcoming tests. And on friday morning they had a seminar where they had to be present, or they would have to do an other test laster on.

"Then you can see day two, if I qualify for it," Becca said, nodding. "Austin are you coming with us?"

Payson knew that Kelly would have come with them down to Florida, but after she got sick the doctor informed her that she shouldn't be flying, so she had to stay home. It had not been a hard decision for Austin to stay home with her.

"Not this time Becca," Austin said. "Someone has to take care of the gym."

"You're leaving the gym in Austin's hands?" Becca turned and asked Sasha. "That sounds potentially dangerous."

"Hey, I'm a very responsible man!" Austin said, waving his fork around.

Everyone laughed. Only a few months ago Payson would have agreed with her sister. But she saw a change, in both Austin and Kelly. They were calmer, more responsible. They were going to make perfect parents.

.:.

After dinner Austin and Sasha were sitting in the living room, a beer in hand, while the girls drank tea in the kitchen.

"So you and Sasha are finally moving forward?" Kelly asked, low voice so the guys couldn't hear their gossip.

"We are," Payson said. It felt strange talking about it, she had never been the kind of girl gossiping about boys. But she also felt that she wanted to share her joy. She hadn't felt as happy in a long time. "I've got a key to his apartment," she smiled.

"You're moving quickly, in this pace you'll get married before us."

Payson felt her heart beat. She had never even thought about marriage. With Sasha or any other guy. She has never dreamed about it growing up, never played pretend wedding.

"I doubt that," Payson said. She didn't see it happening any time soon, but she could see it happen. She wanted it to happen, in the future when she was done with school and Becca was in college or something. She could imagine it. "But talking about weddings, have you decided on a date yet?"

"August 7th," Kelly said.

"August 7th," Payson repeated, she knew what that date meant. It had been the last day of gymnastics competition in 2012. It was the day Kelly and Austin had gotten together for real. Nothing else, no NGO or jealous teammates, had stood in their way then. "How romantic," Payson smiled.

"And we can plan a bachelorette party for when you're not pregnant," Becca said.

"I don't need a bachelorette party," Kelly said. Before either Payson or Becca could disagree she had changed the subject.

"So how are Jason?" she asked Becca. "Is he on the guys junior team?"

Becca nodded. "He did very well at TC. He's also going to Berlin next month."

Payson knew Jason was also on the junior national team. She had tried really hard not to think too much about Becca being in Colorado, with Jason, without any supervision. She trusted her sister, but she knew how it was, being away like that. Not wanting to think too much about it, she moved the conversation along.

"What did you think about McIntyre?" Payson asked, she still held a small grudge at him for not believing in her before the Olympics.

"He was okay I guess," Becca said. "He told me I shouldn't listen too much to you when it comes to redesigning routines too closely to competitions."

"She won four Olympic golds, I would listen to every piece of advise if I were you," Sasha called from the living room. He had confessed to her, when he came to help her with the new routine, that he didn't like coach McIntyre. Sasha had been very agitated when Payson told her that McIntyre had told her she would be the lead-off.

Payson smiled as she saw Sasha walking around the corner. She moved over to the chair inside hers to make room for him to sit down.

"That's what I said," Becca smiled. "I don't think he likes me any more."

"You Keelers, always getting into fights with the coaches," Sasha shook his head and added a dramatic sigh.

Payson leaned closer and elbowed him. "We always do okay," she said.

"Never said anything else," he smiled and placed a kiss on her cheek.

.:.

The following week went far too quickly for it to be healthy. Becca stayed late at the gym both Monday and Tuesday. The same days Payson went straight to the library after school to study for the upcoming tests.

On Wednesday, the evening before Becca would fly to Miami, Payson got a text from Sasha. _Come get your sister, she refuses to leave._ So instead of following her friends to the library, she packed up her things and walked to the gym. Entering The City Gym she wasn't very surprised to find it almost empty. Becca was performing her beam routine and Sasha was standing next to the beam, otherwise it was empty, and almost dark.

Payson remained by the door, watching her sister perform the dismount perfectly.

"How was is?" Becca asked her coach, twisting her hands like always when she was nervous or stressed.

"I'm not going to say anything," Sasha said, crossing his arms over his chest. "You need to go home and pack and sleep."

"I will. Just one more time," Becca said, walking over to the other end of the beam.

"No Becca, you've said that for an hour now," Sasha said.

"Fine... the vaults then?" she asked. "I just need to go through them one more time."

Payson couldn't help smiling as she walked further into the gym. "Hey, you ready to leave Becca?"

"Did you call her?" Becca turned to her coach. Payson was rather glad looks couldn't kill, because then it wouldn't be much left of her boyfriend. As she thought the word boyfriend she felt butterflies wake to life in her stomach. She would never get used to the thought.

"I didn't call her," Sasha said. "I texted her."

Becca groaned.

After a quick glance around the gym, making sure they were alone, she walked over to Sasha. His smile grew for every step she took.

"Hi," she said, putting her arms around his neck.

"Hi," he let his lips gently brush over hers.

Payson kissed him, really kissed him, before letting go again. "Come on Becs, we need to head home."

"I'm just giving in because I don't want to stick around to watch that."

"Sorry Becca," Payson said. "I'll call," she whispered to Sasha before following her sister out of the gym. It was very nice weather outside, so they decided to walk home.

"Hey Becca?" Payson came to a stop and her sister did the same. She waited until they had eye contact. "You'll do great at nationals," she said.

"But what if I don't?"

"As long as you do your best, I'll be proud, whatever the outcome," Payson said, hugging her sister. "But I do honestly believe you'll do great."

Becca smiled. "Thanks."

A/N: Next chapter will be nationals! And we're going to see some old characters, both characters from this fic and from the show. Will try to have it up by thursday or so.


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: I realize now that a national team would be decided after a national championship, my bad. So let's pretend, that in this world there's only a nationals for seniors. Becca and the other gymnasts on the junior national team (boys and girls) get an automatic spot in the competition to "see and learn." You with me? I also tried to research how the actual competition is done, but my head melted before coming that far. So I decided that qualification rounds were on day on (Thursday for women, Friday for men) and finals on day two (Saturday for women and Sunday for men). I hope I'm not making you too confused. It's not too focused on the details of the competition anyway ;) I hope you enjoy the chapter! It's a long one.

.:.

At the end of the week, Payson was taking the train to the airport, just as she had with her sister three days earlier. She used the time to study. The mountain of work she had to do for school was growing every day and she was feeling slight panicky.

Payson never had anything against traveling, but she didn't really love it either, the transportation part that is. She loved discovering new places, getting there was just a necessary part. But this time, as she touched ground in Miami, she kind of wished she'd had an other hour or so on the plane. She had promise herself that she wouldn't do any studying while in Miami, so she had hoped she would finish the work during the flight... She hadn't, but she was there to support her sister and that was what she was going to do. School had to wait.

"Payson!"

Payson was surprised to hear her name being called as she walked through the airport. She looked around and it took a while before she spotted the person calling. It shouldn't have though, the dark man was a head taller than everyone else.

"Richard!" she said, dropping her suitcase to hug her sister's former coach. "What are you doing here?" she asked.

"Picking you up from the airport," he said.

"I meant in Miami," Payson clarified with a smile. She took her suitcase and they left the arrival hall.

"The wife and I were so tired of the bad weather in the city, so we decided on a small trip," he smiled.

"So it had nothing to do with a certain gymnastics competition being held here this week?"

Richard smiled but didn't answer the question. "Becca looked amazing yesterday," he said. "Her new beam routine really upped her chances for an All Around medal next month."

"Medal?" she asked. Her sister was ranked second in the country amongst juniors, Payson had just gotten used to that.

"I think she'll medal at worlds," Richard explained.

Payson felt like passing out, or laughing. Even though Payson herself had been ranked second, and for a brief period while Kelly was out with her foot, first, as a junior. She hadn't had the opportunity to go to junior worlds, or compete against junior national team from any other county. Her knee had stopped her from that. So this was all kind of new to her.

Everything felt so much faster, so much bigger, for her sister. Maybe it was because Payson didn't do the hard work this time around. She remember her mother and father always complaining about how fast everything moved. And Payson hadn't gotten the same amount of attention that Becca did. There had been Kelly to take the spotlight for the juniors, and most focus had been on Nastia and Shawn anyway. She certainly didn't feel jealous of her sister.

"How's school going?" Richard asked, waking Payson up from her wandering thoughts by opening the car door for her.

Payson sat and waited for Richard to walk around the car and come inside before answering his question. "It's going okay, I think," she said. "There's a lot to do, but it's fun."

"That's good. As long as you know that's what you want to do, I guess it's worth the work."

Payson nodded in agreement. Even if she sometimes felt like she was drowning in schoolwork, she was still a hundred percent sure she was doing the right thing.

"Everything good with you and Sasha?"

Payson felt a smile grow on her lips. How she had missed her British boyfriend the last couple of days. "Better than ever," she said.

"It makes me happy to hear that," Richard said. "Maybe the two of you want to eat dinner with my wife and I tonight?"

"That would be very nice," Payson said. She had missed Richard. "How's retirement?"

"Very hectic," he laughed. "There's so much to do. Visiting children and grandchildren, working on the house, in the garden. It never ends."

By the large smile on his face, Payson assumed that it was a good thing. She had a hard time imagine Richard walking around without anything to do.

Arriving at the hotel, she thanked Richard for the ride and they agreed to meet up for dinner the same evening. The hotel she was staying at was the same that most of the gymnastics teams also stayed at, including the city gym's gymnasts and coaches. Unfortunately Sasha was sharing room with the assistant coach Matt. So Payson had to have her own room. She checked in and got the key.

The room was on the 14th floor and had an amazing view. She had barely gotten inside the room before someone was knocking on the door. With a quick glance in the mirror, making sure she looked somewhat presentable, she opened the door to find Sasha waiting with a smile.

Payson pulled him inside and slammed the door close before kissing him.

"I missed you," she said as they broke apart.

His finger was tracing her face. "I missed you too," he smiled. "I bumped into Richard, he told me about dinner."

"I was so surprised to see him," Payson said. "Was it okay that I made plans for us?" she then asked. Even if she'd had boyfriends before, she had never been in a relationship this... serious. She would never before have even considered making plans for any of her boyfriends.

"Of course, sounds fun," Sasha said.

"Maybe not as fun as a night in?" she smiled.

Sasha's smile grew, if possible, even larger. "We have time for that too."

Their lips locked again and Payson let her hands wander under his shirt. She loved the feeling of his muscular chest under the palm of her hands. She broke the kiss to pull his shirt off. She then took off her own as well. He trailed her cheek and neck with kisses as he moved on to take her bra off.

"I've missed you so much," Sasha whispered and moved closer to her, steering her further into the room. When her leg touched the bed, he slowly lowered her down on her back. "I haven't been able to stop thinking about your beautiful body."

He kissed her neck again, causing her to shiver. He continued down, over her breast and stomach until he came to the edge of her jeans. He unbuttoned them and she lifted her hips so that he could pull them off. Her underwear disappeared the same way. The way he looked at her gave her goosebumps all over her body. It was like he was starving and she was the food. She bit her lip, no one had ever looked at her quite like that.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered.

"Come here," she whispered and motioned for him to come closer, so she could kiss him again.

.:.

Payson had thought she would get used to the post-sex bliss she felt every time she had sex with Sasha. But when every time felt better than the last, even though she could have sworn nothing would ever feel better than the first time she had sex with Sasha, how could she ever get used to it? Her whole body was still tingling and it felt like her head had exploded, in a good way. The expression mind blowing now had a new meaning to her.

"That was amazing," he breathed.

"I loved the way you looked at me," she confessed.

"I love looking at you," he smirked.

It was already half past seven, and if Payson wanted to say hi to her sister before dinner she would have to hurry. She didn't really want to get out of the bed, she wanted the moment, the feeling of pure bliss, to last forever. But it couldn't.

"I need to go see Becca," she said, finally sitting up. "I should probably shower first though..."

"I need to shower and change as well," he said with a sigh and got out of the bed. She had a smile on her lips as she watched him get dressed.

"See you in a few," he said and kissed her. After Sasha left the room Payson hurried into the shower.

She tried to not waste too much time thinking. She washed her hair, got out of the shower and got ready for the dinner. She only had one dress with her, so it was an easy choice. She blow dried her hair, put some mascara on and then got into the black simple dress.

"It'll have to do," she told her reflection in the bathroom.

Sasha had told her that Becca was in a room on the floor below, so she grabbed her things before walking out and taking the stairs down. She found room 1305 and knocked.

"Come in!" she heard Becca call from inside.

She did as told and opened the door. She hesitated slightly when she saw Becca sitting on her bed, legs crossed, opposite of Jason, sitting the same way. Between them were two laptops set up.

"Hi," she said. "Am I interrupting?"

"Hi, come in," Becca said. "We're doing history homework, so you're definitively not interrupting."

"I can go if..." Jason trailed off, looking between Payson and Becca.

"No, you don't need to leave," Payson said, feeling bad for the boy. She and Sasha seemed to have scared him more than intended. "How did it go yesterday?" Payson asked her sister, sitting down on second, empty bed. Neither Becca nor Sasha had answered her texts with anything else than short _it's fine_, kind of messages, and she hadn't had time to look up the results online.

"Brilliantly," Becca smiled. "I qualified for the all around final and bars and floor event finals."

"Wow, congratulation Becca!" she smiled, really surprised. Even though she knew Becca was good, she hadn't thought she would do that good in her first Nationals. "How did you do Jason?"

"As expected," he said. "I didn't qualify for anything, but I'm happy with my results."

"That's the most important part," Payson smiled. "So I'm heading out to dinner," she said, turning to her sister again. "Call if you need anything."

Becca nodded. "Have fun," she smiled.

.:.

The following morning Payson woke up well rested, even if the evening before had gotten rather late. They had left dinner at ten since Sasha needed to do bed check to make sure all gymnasts were where they were supposed to. After that they had spent the rest of the evening in Payson's hotel room. Or as long as they dared, Sasha had to go back to his hotel room at a decent time so Matt wouldn't suspect anything. Payson had shared the news Becca told her, about everyone already assumed that they were together, with Sasha, but together they had decided to continue being careful around the gym. They wanted to be professional.

A glance around the hotel restaurant told her Becca hadn't arrived yet, so Payson got a cup of coffee and chose a table by the windows. She didn't have to wait long for her sister to arrive.

"Good morning," Payson said as her sister sat down across the table.

"Morning," Becca mumbled, leaning her head against her hand.

"Not slept well?" Payson asked.

"No it was fine," Becca sighed. "Just too early for breakfast now."

"It's seven o'clock Becca, you're usually in the gym by now."

Becca rolled her eyes and got up again. Payson watched her sister get coffee and a bowl of cereals before sitting down at the table again.

"Nervous?" Payson asked.

Becca shrugged. Before she could say anything her phone beeped from her pocket. Becca dived down to read the text.

"Can Jay eat with us?" Becca asked, looking up from the phone.

"Now?" Payson asked and Becca nodded. "Sure, of course."

It only took a couple of minutes before Payson spotted Jason walking inside the restaurant. He got some food before joining them at the table.

"Good morning," he smiled.

Payson repeated the greeting while Becca mumbled something, her head now back in her hand.

"You're up early for not competing today," Payson said. Most of the gymnasts who didn't qualify for the finals, and especially the men who didn't compete at all that day, wouldn't be seen until it was time to go to the arena.

"He's such a morning person," Becca said. "Annoyingly happy in the mornings as well."

"I'm not annoyingly happy," he said. "I'm just not a zombie like you."

Becca elbowed her friend, but he just laughed.

Payson smiled. They were rather cute.

"Good morning," a British accented voice suddenly said behind Payson.

She turned around with a smile, happy as always to see Sasha. He sat down next to her.

"Good morning," she smiled, under the table he squeezed her leg gently.

"Prepared for the big day Becca?" Sasha asked.

Becca, who was still half way to zombie, nodded, eyes closed. "I think so," she mumbled.

"And hopefully, by then, you'll be awake," Sasha said.

"Exactly," Becca answered.

Payson took her and her sisters empty coffee cups and rose. "Anyone else wants some coffee," she looked between Sasha and Jason.

"No, thank you," Jason said. "I don't drink coffee."

"I'll come with you," Sasha said and followed Payson to the buffet table. When they came around the corner, Sasha stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. She turned and looked at her very sexy boyfriend. He leaned down and they kissed.

"That's a proper good morning," he smiled.

"Payson, Sasha! Good morning!"

They jumped apart at the sound of Richard's cheerful voice. His laughter was always contagious and Payson felt a smile grow on her lips. "Good morning," she smiled. "Come join us for breakfast."

Richard followed them to the table. As Becca saw him she straightened up, looking suddenly more awake.

"Ready for today Becca?" Richard asked.

"I think so," she said. "Starting to get a bit nervous."

"Oh, you don't need to be nervous. This is your first Nationals, no one does a perfect first Nationals, you just go out there and have fun."

Becca nodded and gratefully accepted the cup of coffee from Payson.

"So Jason and Becca, still sneaking around the gym together?" Richard asked.

The silence that fell over the table was almost more comical than awkward, but only almost.

Becca and Jason looked from each other to the three adults around the table. Jason looked scared while Becca looked more embarrassed. Payson felt bad for them, this was all her fault.

"I'm sorry, did I say something wrong?"

"No, we're just... We're friends, I promise!" Jason looked absolutely terrified.

"Don't worry about it," Payson said. "I'm sorry I've been hard on you," she didn't know what to say, or how to say it. Her ringing phone stopped her from dwelling on it too long. Kelly's name on the display made her smile.

"I'll just take this," she told the people around her at the table and got up. She walked around the corner before answering.

"Hi friend," Kelly said when she answered. "How's Miami?"

"It's good," Payson said. "How are you doing?"

"I'm fine, bored, but health wise I'm fine. When does Becca go on? She told me she qualified for the all around?"

"Starts at ten, we're going to the arena just before nine."

"I'm so nervous for her, how is she?"

"She doesn't talk much, I think she's a bit nervous actually." Becca had never been one wasting energy on worrying or being nervous, but Payson had noticed a change in her sister. She guessed now when Becca took the sport more serious, she also had more to lose, which explained the nervousness.

"Can I talk to her?"

"Sure," Payson said. "You take care. I'll call tonight?"

"Of course, say hi to the others for me!"

They said their good byes and Payson walked back to the table and handed over the phone to her sister.

"Thanks," Becca said. "I'll see you upstairs later?" Payson nodded and Becca got up. She took a fast grip around Jason's arm and dragged him with her. Payson sat down at the table again.

"Kelly said hi," she said.

"Are you being hard on your sister for seeing a boy in the gym when you're doing the exact same thing?" Richard asked, using his stern coach voice.

Payson saw that Sasha looked like he had been on the receiving end of a scolding. "They're 14," Payson defended herself.

"They work hard, are nice and responsible kids. Why shouldn't they be allowed to have whatever kind of relationship they want?" Richard asked.

Payson once again felt bad over the situation.

"They shouldn't have to sneak around about it," Richard continued. "What if they start to like the sneaking and lying and suddenly that's what's exciting and soon you'll have a sister who falls for the bad boys of the world."

Payson wasn't sure that was how it worked, but what did she know? "I'll talk with them," Payson said, looking more at the table then her sister's old coach.

"Then my work here is done," Richard said and rose. "See you at the competition!"

"Wow, I felt like I was 16 again," Payson said as soon as Richard had left the restaurant.

Sasha laughed. "Him you listen to, when I tried to tell you, you ignored me."

Payson ignored him, again.

"I should get back upstairs, make sure the girls are getting ready," he said.

"See you at a quarter to nine?" Payson asked and he nodded. She had planned on getting some reading done before heading over to the arena, so instead of locking herself up in the boring hotel room, she walked over to the lobby and found a soft chair.

.:.

"Payson?"

Payson looked up from the iPad and saw Jason standing there, shifting his weight between his feet. He looked nervous.

"Becca asked me to give you this," he held out her phone.

She took it and thanked him. She saw that he was carrying a laptop in his other hand. "Looking to use the Internet?" she asked.

He nodded. "I'm going to work some on my history essay before the competition starts."

"Sit down," she motioned to the empty chair across the small table from her.

"I don't want to disturb..."

"You're not," she smiled. "I'm doing homework as well."

He sat down, on the edge of the chair and started his laptop.

"Do you like history?" Payson asked. She realized she knew nothing at all about the boy her sister was hanging out with. Except that he was a very good and promising gymnast.

"It's one of my favorite subjects," he smiled.

"It was mine too," Payson said with a smile. She took a deep breath. "I'm sorry if I've seemed harsh on you and Becca. I just want to protect her."

"I understand," Jason said. "But we're just friends. We're going to wait until we win Olympic golds."

She smiled over the innocence. "Which I think is a really good plan," she said. "But I wanted to let you know that you don't need to sneak around, even if you're just hanging out or if you... Change the plan. You don't need to hide it."

He didn't looks as relived as she thought he would. "What's wrong Jason?"

"My parents don't think the same... When they heard that Sasha had been mad at me... They think I'm focusing too much on other things already. They want me to only think about gymnastics for now. It's really a short career and I need to focus on it."

Payson nodded. She knew the parent-type well. She was about to ask if he wasn't allowed to have friends, which was all he and Becca claimed to be, but she realized they would find it as hard to believe as she had.

"Tell you what, as long as you and Becca keep being honest with me, I won't cause you any more troubles."

He smiled a little. "Thanks."

"I might be breaking a thousands unwritten guardians or responsible-people's rules, but I'm pretty sure I'm following the sister code." And in the end, that's what she was. Becca's sister.

Jason's smile grew a size bigger. "Then maybe I can ask you for advise on Becca's birthday present?"

"Of course," Payson said. She was having troubles herself finding something for her sister who would turn fifteen in two weeks. "Do you have any good ideas?"

.:.

"Welcome ladies and gentlemen, to the National Championship of gymnastics. Today we'll see the women battle it out for the medals."

Payson was sitting amongst the city gym's gymnasts who wasn't competing that day, and the parents who had travelled down to support their children. She had followed her sisters warmup, feeling very confident, but that feeling was gone now. She was so nervous she felt nauseous. Becca was one of two juniors in the finals. The other one, who had won the competition in December, had qualified behind Becca this time around.

"You need to relax," Richard said beside her "And stop drinking so much coffee."

"I know," Payson said. "I don't know why I'm so nervous. It was never this bad when I competed."

"It's the just watching part," Richard said. "You can't do anything to affect the outcome."

Payson guessed he was right. The music started playing and she clapped her hands as the finalists in the all around competition entered the floor. Becca qualified as the fifteenth girl, which was an amazing achievement. As her sisters name was called, she clapped even harder and cheered. She watched her sister walk over to the vault with Helena and Olivia, the other two gymnasts from the city gym who qualified for the finals. Payson spotted Sasha over by the vault. He was totally focused on his three gymnasts. She smiled watching the scene, both her sister and her boyfriend were as focused as one could only be if they were exactly where they were supposed to be.

.:.

"Pay, which dismount should I go with?" Becca asked at the short break. She was calling Payson on Sasha's phone and Payson could hear the nervousness in her sisters voice.

"What does Sasha say?" she asked.

Becca had been working on a new dismount for her uneven bars routine. It had looked really good the past week, but Payson knew Sasha, he wouldn't want Becca to debut it until it was flawless.

"He think I should wait until worlds."

"Why do you want to do it now?"

"Well, Coach McIntyre said I should."

"Becca, I think you should do whatever you feel most comfortable with," Payson said. "What do you want to do?"

"I'm not sure... Is Jay there?"

Payson looked around the group of gymnasts, and spotted him two rows above her. "Yeah, hang on." she stood and held out the phone. "Jason, Becca wants to speak with you."

He looked worried as he took the phone. She sat down again.

"Everything okay?" Richard asked.

"She's just indecisive," Payson said. "It'll be okay as soon as they start the next rotation."

Payson got her phone back a minute later and soon the second rotation started. Sitting on the edge of her seat, she watched her sister get ready. Becca walked up to the uneven bars and as she mounted the apparatus, Payson held her breath.

Gymnastics looked so much easier than it felt. Uneven bars felt like flying, if you had a good run, but it was also very much hard work behind it. Payson still remembered the the hard work. But watching Becca perform her routine Payson thought it looked effortless. As Becca got closer to the dismount, Payson held her breath again. When Becca's hands let go of the high bar she spun around and around and twisted in the air, she then landed solidly on both feet.

Payson got on her feet and cheered for her sister. She couldn't see any regret on her sisters face for choosing the simpler dismount. Payson understood why Sasha wanted her sister to do it. The sight of a perfect routine like that? Much more powerful than harder tricks done half well.

"That was a good routine," Richard said as they sat down again. "Does she have any changes to make for worlds?"

Payson nodded. "A few tricks are still up her sleeve." she got a water bottle out of her purse. She felt like she had just performed a routine herself, her muscles aching and her head euphoric.

.:.

The last routine Becca would perform was floor. After the first day of competition she had ranked third. Becca had told Payson that she would go for the more difficult first passage of tumbling, to take a chance on the scores. Sasha had agreed.

Payson felt terrified as she watched her sister walk over to her starting position. She didn't know if she should close her eyes or dare to watch. Looking away from Becca, stretching her legs, she looked over to the group of people still waiting to perform. She spotted a girl she thought she recognized from The Rock. Next to her stood a coach Payson couldn't place. Had they finally replaced coach Jonson? The team jackets still looked like they always had. She spotted an other The Rock coach jacket, did they have two coaches now? As the two coaches stood next to each other, backs to Payson, one blond with braids, the other a brunette with a ponytail. Was that...?

"And now, on floor, Junior National Team member: Becca Keeler."

Payson turned to watch her sister. Becca looked almost frighteningly calm, but focused. She held her breath as the music came on.

After having seen the floor routines hundreds of times, it still amazed Payson how beautiful it was. Becca flew and danced over the floor, and soon she did the last pirouette and finished the routine on her knees, as always. Payson hadn't spotted one mistake throughout the whole routine. She followed her sister with her eyes and watched her hug Sasha. She also saw one of the two Rock coaches walk over and pat Becca on the back and exchange a few words with Sasha. When the blonde turned to walk away, Payson thought she would pass out as she saw that it was Lauren Tanner. How the hell had Lauren become a coach? The blonde former gymnasts walked over to the other Rock coach, and just as feared, Payson saw that it indeed was Kaylie Cruz. How had Sasha and Becca not told her this?

.:.

"And the final results for floor exercises is here. On first place: Georgia Freeway, Los Angeles, California. Second place Rose West from Austin, Texas. And on third place, junior Becca Keeler from New York City, New York."

Payson couldn't believe what she was hearing. Was this really happening? Had here tiny younger sister just finished third at Nationals? And with a fourth place on even bars, her all around would also be good. She clapped her hands as her sister received her bronze medal.

When it had come to the all around prize ceremony Payson was once again sitting on the edge of the seat. They first called up the three medal winning girls, then they would be calling up the rest of the placements until the 12, which would be the girls on the senior National team.

"On fifth place, but not on the national team due to her young age: Becca Keeler!"

Becca's smile was so beautiful to watch and Payson couldn't do anything else than cheer and smile for her very talented sister. It felt unreal, the whole situation.

.:.

Payson had to wait for an hour, while Becca talked to reporter after reporter, before she could pull her sister into a hug.

"That was amazing," she whispered. "You were amazing!"

"Thanks," Becca whispered back. "Let's head back to the hotel before anyone else wants to talk."

Payson helped her sister to pack up her things and then they walked the short way to the hotel. When they came up the elevator, they saw Jason waiting outside Becca's room.

"Congrats," Jason smiled and got up from the floor. Becca quickly walked over and hugged him. Payson couldn't make out what they were whispering to each other.

"Becca, dinner in half an hour?" Payson asked, not wanting to disturb the cute couple, of friends or more she still wasn't sure off.

"Yeah, see you downstairs," Becca said, letting go of Jason.

"You should come Jason, it's just us and Sasha."

Jason nodded and showed a small smile.

When Becca and Jason had disappeared into Becca's room, Payson turned and knocked on Sasha's hotel room door. He opened, hair dripping wet and dressed only in jeans. If she hadn't been so annoyed at the British man, she would have jumped him. Instead she walked inside and closed the door.

"Do you maybe have something to tell me?" she asked. He looked confused. "Maybe you saw someone we both know today?"

"Oh, you mean Kaylie and Lauren?" Sasha asked.

"Yes! How come you didn't tell me they were coaching at the rock?"

"You didn't know?"

"No, I didn't know!" she voice slightly raised before getting her emotions under control again. "I haven't spoken with them since the Olympics. You might have remembered a certain fight? It ended up on TV?" She turned to leave. "I need to shower," she said.

Before she could leave the room she felt Sasha take her hand, pulling her back.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I thought you made up."

She sighed. "I'm sorry," she said. "I was so surprised to see them... We'll talk more after dinner? I really need to shower."

He kissed her. "I love you," he said with a smile.

She smiled as well, not able to resist. "I love you too."

.:.

When Payson was getting dressed twenty minutes later, there were a light knock on the door. She buttoned the jeans and twisted up her wet hair in a bun before opening the door.

"Hi," Lauren Tanner said, bright smile on her lips.

"Lauren, hi," Payson said, not knowing what else to say.

Lauren hadn't changed one piece in the five years that had passed since the Olympics. She looked pretty much the same, with her bright make up and light hair, she skipped into the room and hugged Payson before flinging herself on the bed.

"So what's up?" Lauren asked, still smiling. "What's happened in your life since we last saw each other?"

"It's been five years Lo," Payson said.

Lauren's smile fell. "I'm very sorry about your parents," she said. "I wanted to make it to the funeral, but I was in Tokyo and... well... I guess I was too... I don't know. I was a coward. I'm sorry, and I'm sorry for your loss."

It might have been the most honest Payson had ever seen her old friend. "Thanks," Payson said. It still hurt talking about her parents.

"Are you in school? Sasha mentioned something about classes and you couldn't come until now."

"I'm at NYU," she said. "Hopefully going to be a physical therapist one day."

"That's so cool," Lauren said. "And are you and Sasha... you know?"

Payson smiled. It might have been hard to forgive Lauren when she found out that she was the one sending the picture to Ellen Beals, but when Lauren got sick Payson had realized what was important in life. She hadn't held the picture against Lauren since. "We're still figuring some things out. What have you been up to?"

Lauren fell into a long story about working as a model around the world before being called back to Boulder. Coach Jonson had gotten fired after an other incident in the gym and with the rumors that Payson was coaching in New York, The Rock didn't want to be worse, so they called Lauren and Kaylie, asking them to try coaching.

"So how's Kaylie?" Payson asked. Payson wasn't proud over it, but she still held somewhat of a grudge when it came to Kaylie. It wasn't the fight at the Olympics. It had started long before that. It had started somewhere around Payson's injury. The fact that Kaylie came crying about pressure and staying on the top when Payson was still in a back brace was something she probably never could forgive.

"She's... okay," Lauren said. "It's hard to tell sometimes. She still trains a lot, eats too little and can't let go of the past."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Payson said, honestly. She didn't wish Kaylie any ill.

"Talking about the past. How's Kelly? Do you still talk with her? Is she with Austin?"

"Kelly and Austin lives in New York," Payson said. "They're good. Kelly's pregnant actually."

"Really?" Lauren's smile brighten up. "Who would have thought that she would have been the first of us to have children? If you don't count Emily."

"Have you talked to Emily?"

Lauren shook her head. Payson hadn't either. Suddenly Payson's phone started ringing loudly from her purse. She pulled it up and saw that it was Becca. She also realized she was late.

"Sorry, I'll be right down," she answered her sister's call. She then turned to Lauren. "I'm late for dinner with Becca and Sasha. Would you like to join us?"

"Sure," Lauren got up from the bed. "I'll get Jake and see you downstairs?"

"You're still with Jake?" Payson asked, surprised.

"On and off," Lauren smiled and disappeared out of the room.

Payson gathered her thoughts for a moment. For a short time, it had almost felt like their time at TC and in London. She kind of missed that simpler time.

.:.

Dinner was very nice. Even though they hadn't seen each other for five years, Lauren was very easy to hang out with, when she was in that mood. After dinner, even though it was late, Payson and Sasha decided to go for a walk. Payson took the elevator up to go get a shirt when she walked straight into Kaylie Cruz.

"I'm sorry, I didn't see you," Payson said. The awkwardness grew quickly. "So, Uhm... How are you?" she smiled, maybe a little forced, but it was a smile. "How's coaching?"

Kaylie looked like she was about to bolt. "I'm fine, it's fine," she then said. "How are you?"

"I'm... Fine," Payson said.

They stood there awkwardly for a moment. Kaylie looked exactly like she did five years ago. It was like time had stood still.

"I should go..." Payson said.

"Me too, bye."

"Bye," Payson said and they parted ways without saying anything else.

After grabbing her sweatshirt, Payson headed downstairs again where Sasha was waiting.

"Sorry it took so long," she said, taking his hand as they walked outside.

.:.

I'm starting to reach the end with this story. There'll be three or four more chapters, which I will try my very hardest to get up before I go on a two week vacation in two weeks. Then I'll probably post an epilog when I get back.


	18. Chapter 18

After spending the Sunday in the gym, watching the men finals, they flew back to New York. Payson and Becca was home not long before midnight and they both stumbled to bed.

The following day everything went back to normal. Becca headed back to the gym for a grueling week, all focused on Worlds in four weeks. Normally a calm day or two follow a National competition, but not for Becca.

Payson was back in school, more stressed than ever before.

"Is everything okay Payson?" Maya asked as they took a short walk outside between classes. They both needed some oxygen if they wanted to survive until lunch.

"Yeah, just much to do," she said. "Are you staying behind to study for the test?"

Maya nodded. "We could look through it together if you want to? There's a chapter from the Orthopedic book that I could really need some explanations on."

Payson nodded. "Sounds good," she said, stretching out her neck. She was getting a tension headache. She needed a really good workout, to get a release from all the stress she was feeling.

She made sure class hadn't started before taking her phone out. _Need a workout, any ideas?_ She sent the text to Sasha. She had some really _nice_ ideas for workouts herself. They all included her and Sasha and possibly a bed or a couch, or any empty space would do.

.:.

When Payson got a text back, saying to meet him at a certain address at six, it wasn't what she had expected. She had counted on a quickie in the gym when all gymnasts had left for the day. But she was up for everything that could give her some energy. So she packed a bag with workout clothes and shoes and met Sasha at the address at six pm. He was waiting for her when she got there.

"What are we doing here?" she asked after greeting him with a kiss.

"Wait and see," he said.

He took her hand and they walked inside a loud gym. Payson looked around and realized they were in a boxing gym. Two women were boxing in a ring just inside the doors. Further into the gym several men and women were training either alone or together, against each other or against bags hanging from the roof.

"When I said workout, I meant sex," she whispered.

Sasha laughed. "I know, we'll have time for that too," he smiled.

"Sasha! Nice to see you man! Where have you been?"

Sasha greeted the dark haired guy with a half hug before turning to Payson. "Pay, this is Chris, an old friend. Chris, this is Payson, my girlfriend."

Payson smiled, hearing the word girlfriend coming out of Sasha's mouth still made her stomach flutter. "Nice to meet you," she said, shaking Chris's hand.

"Are you here to train?" Chris asked. "Wouldn't say no to go a round."

"Not today," Sasha smiled. "Haven't trained in a while. I thought I would introduce Payson to the wonder of boxing," he turned to her. "It's the best stress relief."

She didn't doubt him. "I need to change..." she said, looking around the big hangar looking gym.

"I'll show you," Chris offered.

"Keep your hands and your stories to yourself, Chris!" Sasha called in a warning after them.

Payson looked over her shoulder at her boyfriend before turning to Chris. "What does he mean?"

"I steal all his girls," Chris laughed. "You know, everything he can do, I can do better," the smirk told her he was joking, at least partly.

"And the stories?" she wondered how Sasha and Chris knew each other.

"You need to prove yourself worthy first," he said, holding a door marked women open for her. "When or if you do, I'll tell you all about the adventures of Sasha Belof."

Payson changed into the clothes and shoes she had brought. She felt almost naked as she pulled a little at the hem of the short booty shorts. She had counted on it only being her and Sasha, so she was more dressed to tease him than to actually work out. She put her hair up in a pony tail and took a deep breath. She looked good, she refused feeling ashamed over her body.

Walking out of the changing room Sasha confirmed that she looked good, he smiled and shook his head as soon as he laid eyes on her. He had also changed and was dressed in a pair of cut off sweatpants and an unzipped sweatshirt. He was holding a pair of gloves and motioned for her to follow him into the back of the gym.

"You look very sexy," he whispered before handing her the gloves.

She pulled the gloves on, eager to learn how to box.

.:.

Forty five minutes later she was panting. Her abs and arms were screaming in lack of oxygen.

"Again," Sasha said, holding up the focus mitts.

She took a deep breath, held it and punched her right hand into his left.

"Breathe Payson," he said as she pulled back the hand and punched her left hand into his right instead. She tried to focus on breathing out as she punched the mitts on Sasha's hands, and breathing in between the punches. "Harder! Don't give up!" He counted her hits and when she reached twenty he took his hands down.

"I'm dying," she said, leaning her hands on her knees, breathing hard.

"You're out of shape."

Sasha was enjoying the training session way too much. And he sounded very much like he used to do during their long, hard days at The Rock. It kind of turned her on.

"Okay, next round," he said, holding the mitts up again.

"I can't," she was still panting.

"Come on Pay, two more rounds, then you're done."

She groaned but rose, taking the stance Sasha had taught her, left foot in front of her right, hands up protecting her face. A few deep breaths and she began punching the focus mitts.

Reaching twenty he, instead of taking down his hands, reached out pushed against her hand, causing her to more or less punching herself in the face.

"Hey!" she said, taking a couple of steps back. It hadn't hurt, and wouldn't leave a mark, she was more surprised.

"It's boxing," he laughed.

"You suck," she leaned against her knees again. Her body would give out on her soon.

"Okay, last round. Come on. Thirty times."

It was like they were transferred five years back in time. She just did as told. And when she reached the last punch, she was prepare for his tricks. After defending herself, she sat down on the floor and then lay down. Her body was drained of energy.

"You're a natural," he smiled.

"You're not getting any sex for a week!" She probably wouldn't be able to move for a week anyway.

.:.

The following morning Payson woke up with an aching body. Every muscle in her upper body hurt to move. It took her half an hour in a very hot shower and two cups of coffee to turn into a human being again.

"Are you okay?" Maya asked as Payson groaned lifting her bag when they left the lecture for lunch break.

"I'm fine," Payson said. "Sasha took me boxing last night, and I'm not in as good shape as I wished."

"You're hanging out with your former coach a lot," Maya said.

"We're friends," Payson lied. It wasn't that she didn't trust Maya, she just didn't want to talk too much about it.

Arriving at the cafeteria they walked over to the magazines first. Maya had told Payson that she was addicted to read about celebrities. Payson glanced at the fitness magazines before moving on to the sandwiches. She picked one and paid before going out and found a table.

"Friends, huh?" Maya sat down across the table and pushed the open magazine to Payson.

A picture of Payson and Sasha walking down the streets of Miami, hand in hand, took up half the page. A small circled grainy pictured of them kissing was attached to the small article.

_A fairytale with happy ending?_

_Four time Olympic gold medalist Payson Keeler, 23, was seen walking the street with her former coach, and they looked about as close as they did in the kissing picture from 2011. Sasha Belof, 33, an Olympic gold medalist for England, came out of retirement to coach his former adepts younger sister Becca Keeler, 14, who is now taking the world with storm. _

_So, did the fairytale that started with a scandal finally have a happy ending? Sources tell us it has. Payson and Sasha is happily engaged, according to the same sources. But don't expect any baby bumps any time soon. Keeler just started school again after some time off following her parents tragic deaths last year. Sources says Payson Keeler is very happy right now, which she really deserves, so good on her! _

Payson closed the magazine and sighed. "We're not engaged," she said, giving back the magazine.

"But you're hooking up?"

Hooking up, maybe it wasn't the proper term to describe them, but she nodded anyway.

"He's so hot," Maya smiled dreamingly.

"He is," Payson smiled back.

"He should come when we go out next weekend for Derek's birthday."

Payson nodded, it was probably for the best anyway. Even though Payson told Derek she had a boyfriend when he tried to ask her out a few weeks ago, he continued flirting with her. Maybe he didn't believe her, but bringing Sasha to the birthday party would prove it.

.:.

Payson didn't see Sasha again until Wednesday afternoon when she went to the gym after school. She greeted him with a glare before heading in to the office.

"Hey, how are you?" Sasha asked, coming in after her.

"I would be fine, if I could move my arms."

He laughed. "I thought we should go back and train again tomorrow," he said, leaning in and kissing her cheek.

"Yeah, no, that's not happening," she said, shaking her head. "I'm pretty sure my arms are about to fall off."

"Maybe I can give you a massage?" he whispered, leaning closer. "It's one of my hidden talents."

She smiled. "That I wouldn't say no to."

"Can you stay behind tonight?"

She nodded. Becca was going out for dinner with some of the other junior girls to celebrate her fifth place.

But fist she needed to get the junior girls and boys into the annex. A though core workout awaited them.

.:.

Payson waved the gymnasts good bye and made sure the changing rooms were empty before making her way over to the office where Sasha was working on the computer.

"Does the offer still stand?" she asked with a sweet smile.

"Of course," he said and looked up. Whatever he was doing it could apparently wait until the following day, because he was quick to turn off the computer. Together they walked to the small room inside the fitness center that held a massage table. Payson pulled her shirt off and unbuckled her bra. She smirked as she saw Sasha eye her. But if he wanted sex, he would have to give her a very nice massage first.

She laid down on the table and behind her she heard him move around.

"This might be a bit cold."

A sudden spray of lotion on her back made her jump. It was cold, very cold. But soon his warm hands was on her shoulders. He started out slowly and lightly and she might not ever have felt anything as nice in her entire life. Then he started putting some pressure on her aching muscles and she wanted to moan.

"You're very good at this," she said, feeling totally relaxed.

Until he put even more pressure on the muscles. She moved a little. "Don't kill the poor muscles, they barely survived these past two days," she said as he worked on her biceps and deltoid muscle on her right upper arm.

"No pain no gain," he said she could hear the smile on his lips.

.:.

Payson got home just a couple of minutes before Becca later that evening. She felt like a pile of spaghetti.

"You look happy," Becca said, sitting down in the sofa next to Payson.

"I am," she said, turning to watch her sister. "I haven't been this happy in a long time." It felt like forever, sometimes it was hard to remember life before their parents accident. "How are you?" she asked her sister.

"I'm okay," Becca said, shrugging.

"I don't want you to be okay Becca," Payson said. "I want you to be amazing."

"I'm getting there," Becca said small smile on her lips.

Payson nodded. "I was thinking of inviting Sasha over for dinner on Saturday before I go out with my study group. Would you like to invite Jason over?"

"Would that okay?" Becca asked.

"Of course," Payson said. "Your happiness shouldn't depend on a boy, but if he makes you happy, I don't want to stand in the way for that."

"He does make me happy," Becca said, smiling.

"Then he should come over," Payson said.

"Thank you."

"So, wanna watch a horror movie?"

.:.

When Saturday arrived Payson felt nervous and restless the whole day. While Becca was in the gym, Payson walked between her books, cleaning and making dinner. She tried doing everything at the same time, not being able to relax enough to calm down and focus on one thing at a time. Practice would end at three, so at five to three she put her books away and changed into a pair of black skinny jeans and a purple top. She was still blow drying her hair when Becca and Jason got back from the gym.

Payson brushed through her hair with her hands before leaving her room. "Hi guys," Payson said.

"Sasha said he would be here in half an hour," Becca said before continuing to show Jason around the small apartment.

"I'll get the dinner ready," she said, disappearing into the kitchen to give her sister some privacy.

Everything except the salad was already done, so she got some tomatoes, lettuce, cucumber and peppers out of the fridge.

"Can I help you with something?" Jason suddenly asked from the doorway.

Payson smiled at the cuteness of the boy. He was dressed in jeans and a white shirt, and his hair was, for once, not all over the place. He looked very different out of the gym. And he looked nervous. "I'm okay, thanks," Payson said. "Why don't you and Becca put on some music?"

He nodded and disappeared out of the kitchen again. Payson continued with the salad. For the hundredth time she wished she hadn't been so hard on them and overreacted. Being the guardian of your sister was difficult. Was she supposed to act as a parent or as a sister? That was the never ending question.

"Hello?" Sasha called from the door.

"I'm in the kitchen," Payson called.

She heard her boyfriend greet her sister and Jason before he came into the kitchen.

"Hi," he said, coming over to kiss her cheek. "How did studying go?" he asked.

"Not well," Payson sighed. "Couldn't concentrate..."

"You should have come to the gym then," Sasha said. "I missed you."

"I missed you too," Payson smiled.

.:.

"Are you sure we should leave them? All alone?" Sasha whispered as they were getting dressed for going out.

"It'll be okay," Payson said, hoping she was right. "I trust Becca," she said more to herself than to Sasha.

"Yes, but do we trust _him_?" Sasha whispered, peeking into the living room where Becca and Jason were studying.

Payson pulled Sasha away from the doorway. "Yes we do," she said. "Thank you for worrying for my sister, it means the world to me, but it'll be fine."

He sighed. "I know."

"Bye guys!" Payson called into the apartment.

"Be responsible!" Sasha called. Payson pushed him out of the apartment and closed the door behind them. If she started to think too much she might have changed her mind.

.:.

"Guys, you remember Sasha?" Payson called over the music. They were in a club Payson had never even heard of before, but apparently it was popular. "Sasha, you remember Maya, Derek and Eric," she pointed out the members from her study group. "And this is George and Felicity, they're also in my class."

They all greeted each other before making their way over to the bar. Payson ordered a beer for Sasha and one for her. They then walked together to the top floor where they found a booth with couches and a table. They didn't fit everyone in the small booth, so Payson sat down on Sasha's lap to make room for Maya next to them.

"You better not move too much or we'll be in trouble," he whispered in her ear, making her laugh.

"Did you finish the chapter last week?" Maya asked Payson over the music.

"No, let's make a deal!" Derek shouted, interrupting them. "No talking about school, at all, for the entire night!" Derek and Eric had started to party early and were already drunk.

Everyone was quick to agree and cheer on the no school talk rule. They needed to escape reality for a while. Payson choose to ignore the glance Derek had given her as they all cheered.

"Payson, let's go dancing!" Maya said and took Payson's hand. Payson tried to get Sasha to join her, but he refused. Payson, Maya and Felicity walked, hand in hand, out on the dance floor.

Even if Payson had never been a big partyer, she had missed it. Going out with friends, losing yourself to the rhythm, no worries in the world.

Dancing she could see Sasha at the table. He was watching her every move, dark eyes. She smiled. She loved the way she could effect him. She turned back to her friends, dancing, laughing over the loud music. The whole time she could feel Sasha's eyes on her back, or more like her ass. She smirked.

"You two are so cute!" Maya leaned in and shouted over the music.

"What?" Payson didn't understand what her friend meant.

"He's not stopped watching you for even a second the whole night," Maya said with a smile.

Payson turned and watched him again. He was still watching her, drinking from the beer in his hands. She smiled and bit her lip. She wanted to return to the table and more or less jump him, but she stopped herself, instead she turned to her friends.

"I need an other beer," she said and walked over to the bar.

The place was full of people and she had to wait to order anything. Suddenly she felt a hand on her tight. It was a hand that shouldn't be there. She turned around quickly and came face to face with Derek. They stood so close she could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"Uhm, hi Derek," she said, not knowing what else to do.

"Hi beautiful, do you wanna get out of here?" he asked.

She took a step back at the stench of the alcohol as he spoke. "I think I'm staying a bit longer," she said, working hard to keep her voice light. "I haven't had the chance to dance with my boyfriend yet."

"Boyfriend," Derek said with a frown. "You shouldn't be tied down with a boyfriend. You should be free, like me."

Payson ignored her drunk class mate and ordered herself a beer. When she was about to leave, she felt his hand on her arm. She turned around.

"Kiss me once and say you don't want me."

"Derek, I have a boyfriend that I love. Please don't destroy our study group," she said before turning and walking away.

The loud music over voiced anything he called after her. She found her way over to Sasha, who was still sitting at the table with Eric and George. When she came over he looked up at her, instantly frowning and standing up.

"Everything okay?" he asked, moving in close to her.

Forcing away the annoyance she felt with Derek, she nodded and took her boyfriends hand. "Dance with me?" she didn't want the evening ending on a sour note.

"What's up with him? Did you fight or something?" Sasha said, looking over her shoulder at Derek.

"I'm not sure," she said. "He's drunk and lonely."

"Did he hit on you?" Sasha asked, now looking at her. "Are you okay? Should I go over and punch him?"

"No you shouldn't," Payson said. She took Sasha's face in her hands so their eyes locked. "I'm okay, but I'm angry with him and when he's sober I will make sure he understands there's never going to be anything between him and me. If he can't accept that, I'll ask to change study group." When she saw that he relaxed she added: "If I needed him punched, I would have done it myself. I know how to now."

He smiled a little. "Remind me to never make you angry," he said.

"You would never treat me in a way that deserved a punch," Payson said. "Now dance with me. I want to dance with my very hot British boyfriend."

"Your wish, my command," he smiled and kissed her before walking her out on the dance floor.

.:.

"Do you wanna come by my place?" Sasha asked as they stepped out on the street. After coming out from the loud music, the busy street sounded unusually quiet.

"I can't, Becca is home..." Payson said with a sigh. She hoped her sister was alone by now, and that a certain, very cute, male gymnast hadn't stayed too late.

"She won't notice, you'll be home before she wakes up tomorrow morning," he smirked.

"Are you asking me to come over for sex?" she asked.

"Maybe," he smiled.

"I would love to, believe me, but I need to get home," she said.

"In the future, we'll live together and then we can have sex whenever we want," he said, pulling her in for a hug.

She liked that future, but it seemed too far away. When they were about to part ways, she grabbed his hand. "You could come with me?" she said. "We'll be really quiet and you need to leave before Becca wakes up..."

He smirked. "Sounds like a fantastic plan," he kissed her before getting them a taxi.

.:.

A/N: I can't believe it's only two chapter left after this one. I'm writing the last one now. Will try to have the next chapter up this weekend.

I don't know if you all are loosing interest in make it or break it fanfics, but I'm not. I have a couple of ideas for fics after this one. Not as long as this one though. I'll probably write a quick summary of them both and post with the next, or the last, chapter and I'll have you vote on which I should write first. Won't be able to post them right away, but maybe I'll get some time to write during my trip in August.

But for now, please let me know what you thought about this chapter. And if you would be interested in reading more miobi fics in the future.


	19. Chapter 19

Thank you all so much for your support, in all forms. It means the world to me. This is the second to last chapter. I hope you'll enjoy it.

.:.

"Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Becca, happy birthday to you!"

Payson placed the big cake in front of her sister as they finished the song. Becca took a deep breath and blowed out all of the fifteen candles.

"Have you made this?" Becca asked, looking between the cake and Payson.

Kelly laughed so hard Payson took it as an insult. "No, I bought it from the bakery down the street," she confessed. Kelly might have been right to laugh about the test run, when Payson had tried to make a cake herself. It hadn't ended well.

"But I did make grandmas chocolate cookies myself," she said, feeling proud over at least accomplishing that task.

The week leading up to Becca's birthday had been pretty much similar to how the week before Christmas had been. Payson knew Becca was thinking about their parents as much as she was, but they didn't speak about it. Payson had spent every minute she wasn't in school, at the gym or studying, thinking about their old birthday traditions. She had tried to figure out what to keep and what to let go off. Their grandma had invited them to come down to Minnesota for the weekend, but with only one week left to Worlds, it wasn't the best idea. They had promised to visit during the summer instead.

"Coffee Payson?" Kelly asked, holding up the coffee pot.

"I can do that," Payson said, getting up again. She took the coffee pot from Kelly and continued around the table while Kelly sat down with a sigh. Even though Payson knew Kelly wouldn't fall down dead by pouring coffee, she wanted her friend to sit down and rest, to not overdo it.

"One week until you go to Berlin, you nervous yet Becca?"

Becca shrugged, but Payson knew her sister was nervous. Becca, Sasha and the rest of the team would be flying to Berlin the coming weekend, so they had half a week in Berlin before the competition started to get the jet-lag under control and get used to the arena. Sasha had been appointed assistant coach for the junior national team after the NGO realized The City Gym was one of the strongest gyms in the country.

The competition would start on Tuesday and Payson would be flying in on Wednesday morning. It had been cheer luck that she could go that early. They had a test on Tuesday, and then the rest of the week was unscheduled so they would have time to finish the essay that was supposed to be handed in on Monday afternoon, the day after Worlds ended.

"How did the doctors appointment go?" Payson asked Kelly while Becca and the boys continued talking about Berlin.

"Good," Kelly said. "The blood pressure is still a bit on the high side, but within normal, so they might want to do a cesarean a little bit earlier than the due date."

Payson nodded. She had a lot of research on the subject and had suspected that would be the outcome. "So then we're talking late April?" she asked.

Kelly nodded. "I don't know how I will survive until then," she sighed. "The stomach is already big enough!"

"It's only a little over a month left."

It was true that Kelly's stomach had grown a lot the last few weeks, but it wasn't abnormally large. Not that Payson knew much about pregnancies, but... She stopped herself.

"What's wrong?" Kelly asked, looking at her with worried eyes.

"Nothing," Payson said, but she felt her hands starting to shake so she curled them up to fists under the table. She turned away from her friends. "Becca, how about opening some presents?"

"Yes," Becca said, large smile on her lips.

.:.

The afternoon went by in a grey fog. All Payson could think about was how it was Becca's birthday, so it was March 14th. Which meant Payson was three days late. Three days might not seem like much, but Payson had been a clock work since her period gotten started a couple of months after the Olympics, even when she was on the mini pill.

"This is not happening," Payson whispered to herself as she paced the bathroom. She glared at the box of birth control pills. "You should prevent things like this!" she whispered to them.

She got her phone out for the tenth time that day and started counting days. Of course she was still three days late.

Proceeding to google the meaning of _three days late_, for the second time that afternoon, didn't really calm her down.

"Payson? Are you okay?" Becca called from the other side of the door.

"Yeah, coming," she said. She turned to the box of pills one more time. "Don't say anything about this!" she left the bathroom feeling nauseous, which caused her to feel even more nauseous just thinking about it. Becca was watching her with critical eyes. "Think I might have eaten a bit too much," she said, placing a hand on her stomach. Behind Becca she saw herself in the mirror and quickly took away the hand. "So... How about a movie?"

.:.

The following day Payson could barely focus on the classes she attended. She hadn't slept at all that night, and now she was four days late. Sasha had sent two texts since last afternoon, she had ignored them both.

"Do you wanna head to the library?" Maya asked as they got out of the last class of the day.

"Can't," Payson said. "Need to be at the gym." she was about to go when she stopped herself. "Do you know where the closest drugstore is?"

"There is one just behind the subway station," Maya said. "Why? Are you okay?"

"Just a headache," she waved good bye and quickly headed toward the drugstore.

After spending fifteen minutes walking around the block, she finally stepped inside. Looking around, she spotted the tests easily. And she was in luck, there were no other costumes. She hurried to grab the closest pregnancy tests and paid for it before putting it in her purse. Her pulse was high but slowed down slightly when she walked back outside.

She tried to focus her thoughts, but it was impossible. Going home was out of the question, she had to be in the gym, she has promised to help Becca with the uneven bars dismount. So she walked to the gym, not knowing if she should hurry on her steps, or slow down. Without having decided, she was suddenly there.

"Hi Pay, you never answered my text, are you okay?" Sasha asked as soon as she stepped inside.

"Yeah," se said, forcing a smile. "I just need to," she motioned to the changing rooms. "I'll be right out to help Becca."

She started to turn, but Sasha stopped her. "Are you sure you're okay?" he asked.

She nodded. "I'm fine," she lied, hurrying to escape into the girls locker room. She locked herself into one of the bathroom. Taking deep calming breaths did nothing for her.

The thought of being pregnant terrified her. This wasn't the time. He was the right guy, and she definitively wanted children with him in the future, but not now. Not when she was almost having a panic attack in the bathroom at the thought of it.

She sat on the toilet for five minutes before realizing she couldn't pee. She got up and jumped a few times before realizing the stupidity of what she was doing. With a deep sigh she turned to the sink. Splashing some cold water on her face, made her feel a bit calmer. She packed her things into her purse and left the bathroom. Before walking into the gym she went by the kitchen and got a bottle of water.

.:.

"How's it going?"

Sasha placed a hand on Payson's shoulder, causing her to jump three feet in the air and drop her, by then, empty water bottle.

"Fine," she said, picking the bottle up and stepping away from her boyfriend. Her heart was pounding in her chest.

Sasha looked confused as he watched her. But he didn't call her out on the bullshit.

"I need to go to the restroom," she said, quickly heading into the changing room before he could say anything. She took her purse and once again locked herself into the bathroom. This time she really had to pee, so she hurried to take the test out and read through the instructions again. It wasn't rocket science, but she still read it through several times.

After peeing on the stick, she watched her phone counting down the time.

.:.

"Are you coming Payson?" Becca called from the doorway. Payson stood in the middle of the gym, looking from her sister to the office which held her boyfriend. She really should tell him, she finally decided.

"I need to talk to Sasha," she said. They were the last people in the gym.

"Is everything okay?" Becca asked.

Payson nodded. "Everything is fine," she promised her sister. "I'll be home in less than an hour."

Becca nodded and left the gym. Payson walked with slow steps toward the office. She still felt nauseous. Knocking on the doorway she waited with stepping inside until he looked up.

"Hi," she said. "We need to talk..."

She closed the door to make sure there weren't anyone still around that could hear her.

"What's wrong Payson?" he asked. When she couldn't answer he got up and pulled her in for a hug. "Have something happened?" he asked, worried eyes meeting hers as she looked up at him.

"No, but for a while I thought..." she stopped herself and stepped away from her boyfriend. She looked out at the empty gym before turning back and looking at him. She needed to see his eyes for this conversation.

"I'm not pregnant," she said.

"Okay..." he said slowly, watching her like one would a hurt and scared animal.

"I'm four days late... And I took a test, but I'm not pregnant."

Sasha nodded again. She could see that he connected her earlier behavior to what she was saying.

"Thinking you might be pregnant made you feel...?" he fished for her feelings.

She felt tears pressing behind her eyes. "It made me feel terrified," she whispered.

He stepped closer, but she raised her hand to stop him, and he took a step back again.

"You don't want children?" he asked.

It was nothing they had discussed before, nothing Payson had even thought about before. She couldn't read his face. He was so calm it almost scared her. It was impossible to tell what he was thinking or feeling.

"I want to finish school, and for Becca to... grow up..."

"Would it be the worst case scenario? Having children with me?" he asked, she could hear a hint of hurt in his voice, but his face gave nothing away.

She shook her head, tears escaping. "I want those things, but what scared me..." her heart was still beating too quickly in her chest. "I realized that I would have given it all up to have the baby, if there had been one," she said. "It scares me how much I want a family with you."

This time, when he stepped closer, she didn't stop him. He wrapped her in his arms.

"We'll have a family Payson," he said. "But we'll wait until we feel ready for it, wait for you to achieve your goals."

"All I really want is you," she whispered.

"When you're done with school, and have worked a year or two, we'll start making babies," he kissed her forehead. "But if something changes before that, if anything happens, we'll deal with it together," he said, emphasizing the last word. "You can tell me anything."

"I know," she whispered. "I just needed to figure out what I felt first..." she let him dry her tears. "I was so surprised to feel... Almost hopeful. I mean I was panicked and terrified, but waiting on that stick? For half a second I almost hoped it would be positive... I never... I've never thought about children before."

"Me neither," Sasha said, his hand were still holding her face gently. "This is new territory for both of us."

Payson smiled. How did she become do lucky to end up with a man like Sasha?

.:.

"That would have been so cool, if you were pregnant," Kelly said the following day as they ate lunch during Payson's break between classes. Kelly was on her way to yet an other check up and hadn't taken no for an answer. Apparently it had been pretty obvious during the birthday celebrations that something was wrong. So Kelly had more or less forced it out of Payson. "Our children would have been the same age, growing up together," Kelly gushed on.

"And I would be the person who had dropped out of school most times ever."

Kelly ignore her. "What did Sasha say? Did he panic?"

Payson shook her head and couldn't keep a smile off her face when she thought about him. "He was the opposite of panicked," she said.

"Did you talk about children?"

"We said that when I'm done with school, we'll start our own family," she smiled even broader.

"God, you two are so cute," Kelly said, pinching Payson's cheek.

"I've never thought about things like this before," Payson said, it was all very confusing.

"Austin and I hadn't either until maybe last year," Kelly said. "I don't even remember how it happened any more, but suddenly we had decided that we wanted children."

"It feels like we've been grownups for so long, but we haven't really, have we?"

Kelly shook her head. "I think we grew up quickly, with gymnastics and everything, but the part that makes you an adult. Having lived and loved and all that. It took some time for us."

Payson sipped her coffee and thought about Kelly's words. She was probably right. Being forced to grow up quickly because you have a career and responsibilities isn't the same as becoming a grownup. She had thought the same thing before, after talking with Sasha when they got together.

"Everything is happening so quickly now," Payson said.

"Or really slow considering you kissed him the first time seven years ago."

Payson laughed. Kelly always knew how to cheer her up. "Thank you for being my friend," Payson said. "I don't know how I would have survived all this without you," she said honestly.

"You would have done just fine," Kelly said. "Maybe life wouldn't be as fun, but you would do okay."

They both laughed.

.:.

The same evening Payson met Sasha in the boxing gym. She wasn't sure how he had managed to trick her there again.

"I'll change," she said and headed toward the changing room. Across the big gym she spotted Sasha's friend Chris, she waved and he smiled back before continuing beating the bag in front of him.

Just like the last time they started with technique training. And then she was boxing against bags, and lastly, when she most of all wanted to curl up and die, she was boxing against the mitts on Sasha's hands.

It was an exciting feeling, having him coaching her again. It woke old fantasies to life.

A mitts to her head woke her up from the wandering thoughts.

"Hey!" she said, stepping back and placing her hands on her hips. She was panting and her whole body was aching, she didn't need a concussion as well.

"You need to focus," Sasha said. "Can't let your thoughts wander."

"Maybe I was having very nice thoughts?" she asked and bit her lips.

"Focus!" he said, ignoring her statement. "Start from the beginning."

She groaned.

"Now or I'll start adding extras for every time I have to tell you."

She bit her lip harder for a moment, trying to settle the butterflies in her stomach. With a deep breath she stepped forward and raised her hands again, he did the same.

She got through three more series and was done. But apparently Sasha thought something else, because just as her breath started calming down, he raised the mitts again.

"What are you doing? We're done?" she said.

"I said start over, so you've got two left," he said, motioning for her to get started.

"Come on Sasha," she whined. Actually whined, as if she was 16 again.

"Now or I start adding," he said. His face didn't give anything away. She could never defy him, not in a gym, never could and probably wouldn't be able to in the future either.

She took a deep breath and got started on the last series. It didn't take long to finishing and then Sasha helped her to stretch. As they were almost done, Payson found herself on the floor, in the now empty gym, while Sasha helped her stretch out her hamstrings. She had lost a lot of her extreme flexibility, but she was still rather flexible, to say so herself.

He pressed her leg down against her chest and she grunted as the familiar feeling of pain and pleasure found its way to the backside of her thigh. The pleasure feeling found its way to other parts of her body as well.

Her breathing was shallow and she never broke eye contact with Sasha.

"This was one of my fantasies," she confessed in a whisper.

"Stretching?"

"Well, actually more what could happened after," she said.

"What happened in this fantasy of yours?"

Payson bit her lip and shook her head. She felt too self conscious to talk about it.

"Tell me," he whispered. When she shook her head again, he pressed her legs harder, causing her to grunt again. "Tell me," he repeated. "Or, was it something like this?" he asked, leaning down to kiss her, her leg still between them.

"Something like that," she breathed.

He let her leg go and pushed the other on up, returning to his previous position, leaning down over her. She pulled him closer, not caring about the pain in her hamstring, and kissed him.

"You're so hot when you're all coach mood."

He smirked. "You're really hot when working out," he said.

Suddenly a door opened somewhere and they flew apart. Sasha helped her up from the floor, her legs were all shaky, just when Chris came out of the men's changing room.

"Hey guys," he called. "Wanna go somewhere for some dinner and a beer?"

"I can't," Payson said, pulling her messy hair up in a new bun. "Need to get home to my sister. But you two should go," she said and turned to Sasha.

"You sure you need to go?" he asked. His eyes was still dark of lust. "You're not just avoiding... With me because of...?"

She shook her head. "But next time you're wearing a condom," she whispered. "Unfortunately, I really do need to get home" she said, loud enough for both Sasha and Chris to hear. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

He nodded and pulled her in close so they could said a proper good bye, causing Chris to throw a towel at them to break them up. Payson then pulled a pair of sweats and a hoodie on before leaving the gym.

.:.

Reaching the end of the week, on Friday afternoon to be more specific, Payson and Becca was once again in Becca's room, packing. This time Becca would be gone for a week, or a little over it actually, so she had a big suitcase on the bed, still empty. The following day the junior national team and coaches would fly to Berlin.

"Okay, what do I need?" Becca asked and looked at Payson.

"I don't know Becca," Payson said with a shrug. "I've never been to junior worlds."

"But what did you bring to Rio for worlds?"

Payson could barely remember so far back. It was six and a half years ago. "Just start with your gymnastics things," Payson said. "That's what I always did."

"Good idea," Becca said, walking over to her chest of drawers. "I'll need leos," she mumbled. "And team clothes..."

Payson sipped her tea as she watched her sister pack. She kind of missed it, the nervousness before competitions. She remember going over her packing lists hundreds of times the weeks leading up to a competition.

"Adapter," Payson suddenly said. "You need an adapter so you can charge your phone and laptop," she got up and headed into her room. She should have one of those travel adapters somewhere...

"Do you find it?" Becca called from her room.

Payson went through every box in her room, without success. Thinking about it she hadn't seen it since... She couldn't even remember that.

"I'll call Sasha and ask him to pick one up on the way here," she said as she waked into her sisters room again. "Find your passport and wallet, those are the most important!"

After some initial chaos and panic, Becca found the passport in her desk. Payson felt like her blood pressure was through the roof by then. Before her sister found the passports, she had started googling how to get a new passport on short notice. She was very relived when Becca had suddenly realized it had been in its place in the desk the entire time.

"One travel adapter coming up!" Sasha called as he walked through the doors an hour after Payson had called him. He had been coming over anyway, but Payson still rewarded him with a kiss.

"Thanks," she said. "Come join us, I'm watching Becca try to pack her entire room into one suitcase."

Sasha followed her into her sisters bedroom.

"Wow, how much are you bringing?" he asked. "You know it's a weight limit for the flight?"

Becca made a grimace before returning to sort through the things she was trying to pack.

Payson turned to her boyfriend. "Are you already packed?" she asked.

He nodded. "So I've got all night," he smiled.

"Ew, don't talk like that in my room!" Becca whined and threw a sock on them.

.:.

"Pay? Are you up? Sasha will be here and pick me up soon!" Becca called from outside Payson's door. Payson opened her eyes, waking to the sight of a sleeping Sasha next to her. She gently shook his shoulder as she sat up. They had meant to set the alarm early so it looked like Sasha had arrived that morning. She yawned and pulled her hair up in a bun. It was Saturday morning and all Payson really wanted was to sleep in. But she needed to say bye to both her sister and boyfriend. Sasha would take Becca to the airports so that Payson didn't have to just go out there to go back again. The whole Junior National team would meet up and Becca had told her it was completely okay if Payson stayed home. Which in teenage translation meant that she rather Payson stayed home. So Payson obliged. She had lots of studying to do anyway.

"What time is it?" Sasha asked.

"Eight," Payson said and rose from the bed. She pulled on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt.

"I'll take a quick shower, then we have to go to the airport."

Payson nodded. "I'll make breakfast."

Payson left her room and walked in to the kitchen where Becca was filling the coffee maker up. When Payson took egg and spinach out of the fridge, she could hear the water come on in the shower. Becca turned to her.

"Is that..."

Payson nodded. "Sorry," she said, "We fell asleep."

"You had sex in the room next to mine?" Becca whispered with a horrified expression on her face.

"No we didn't," Payson lied. What Becca didn't know wouldn't hurt her. "We were just talking and we fell asleep."

"Sure," she said and rolled her eyes.

"So, how are you feeling?" Payson asked, changing the subject. "Are all decisions about the routines made? Do you know what to do?"

Becca nodded. "Everything is ready."

"Are you ready?"

"I think so," Becca said. "You will be there on Wednesday, right?"

"Yeah, my flights come in early on Wednesday morning, so I'll see you right before qualifications."

"Good morning," Sasha suddenly beamed from the door to the kitchen. Payson didn't know how he managed to always be so happy in the mornings. Even if it wasn't that early, she still felt like a zombie. She served the egg white omelette on to three plates.

"Food's almost ready," she said, moving on to slicing apples and bananas into a bowl. Fruit and egg white omelette had been her competition breakfast, and Becca had taken after her. It was still five days until competition, but it was a tradition that couldn't be broken without risking bad results.

Superstition was quite common around gymnasts, and even if Payson had pretend not to believe it, there were certain things she still couldn't risk doing. Like not eating egg white omelette on an important day. There had also been a reason behind her purple leotards. One might say that for not believing in superstition, the Keeler sister sure followed the unwritten rules very closely.

"Do you have much studying to do today?" Sasha asked, placing the plates on the table while Becca poured the coffee.

"It's not too bad," Payson said. But it was almost a lie. She had so much to do that her brain was going to explode soon, and not in a good way.

Payson gathered up the fruit and placed it in a bowl before sitting down at the table. Becca sat down across from her and Sasha next to her. The fact that they already had formed their own places at the table made her smile.

"Have you charged your phone or whatever device you're listening to music on?" Sasha asked Becca. "I do not want an other debacle as the one when we flew down to Miami."

Becca jumped up from her seat and disappeared out to the hall, just to come back a minute later and sitting down again. "Yup, all ready for an five hour flight," she said.

"It's actually more like eight hours," Sasha said.

"Eight hours?" Becca asked. "How can it take eight hours? Haven't they built faster airplanes by now?"

"Unfortunately not," Sasha said.

Payson smiled at the exchange. It was impossible to describe how happy she was that her sister and boyfriend got along. "You at least have company on the flight," she said. "I'm going to be so bored."

"You can study," Becca said.

"Yeah, but how fun is that," she said. It was exactly what she was going to do, but she would have preferred having someone with her instead.

"You'll survive," Sasha said.

"Of course I will, but I wanted some sympathy," Payson said, pouting.

Both Sasha and Becca laughed. "I will be traveling with six teenage girls. If anything I deserve some sympathy."

"Hey!" Becca said. "Now I think we should stop complaining about traveling to a competition to watch me. You're giving me a complex."

"Sorry," Payson said, still smiling. "I'm looking forward to watching you compete, sister."

"Thank you," Becca said. "Now let's change subject."

.:.

To not study until she passed out Payson headed over to Kelly and Austin for dinner Sunday afternoon.

"Was Becca nervous yesterday?" Kelly asked, they were sitting in the living room, waiting for Austin to come home with the Chinese food.

"Not too bad," Payson said. "It will probably be worse later," she smiled. It wasn't her sister's first international competition, but it was the first competition on international grounds.

"I promised Austin I would wait to tell you this, but I can't," Kelly said with a big smile. She took a couple of papers from under the table and handed them to Payson. Payson looked at the papers, not believing what she was seeing.

"What is this?" she asked, looking up at her friend.

"Tickets," Kelly smiled even larger. "We're coming with you to Germany."

"What... How... But you shouldn't fly," Payson said.

"The doctor said it was okay. The blood pressure and the blood tests have been okay since the hospital stay. I promised to rest much and take care of myself."

"Which I will make sure you do," Payson said and hugged Kelly. "Becca will be so happy to see both you and Austin."

"I hope so," Kelly said. "I think we're on the same flight as you on Tuesday afternoon."

After checking her details on her phone, Payson saw that her friend was right. They were on the same flight and so was her trouble of boredom solved.

"Here comes the food!" Austin called from the door a few minutes later, interrupting the girls planning for sightseeing in Berlin.

Austin enters the living room with a bag held high and a smile on his lips, but he comes to a stop in the doorway. "You already told her?" he said, looking between the two giggling girls.

"I couldn't help it," Kelly said.

"But I haven't really understood it yet, so you can tell me the news again," Payson said with a smile.

.:.

A/N: I know it's highly unlikable, and actually unbelievable, that someone 7,5-8 months pregnant would fly to Berlin to watch a competition. I don't think you're allowed to fly that late in a pregnancy without a note from a doctor, which Kelly would never get after having pre-eclampsia. But since this is fiction, and I wanted all my favorite character together for the last chapter, I made them come to Berlin.

I was so glad to see that so many of you are still interested in miobi fics. So, here are a couple of suggestions for my coming projects:

1. Congenital Abnormality of the Heart – _One day, after an ordinary day of training, Lauren Tanner heads into the shower. Fifteen minutes later, Payson finds her lifeless body on the floor. _A different take on Lauren's heart disease. Focused on the girls' friendship, but might be a hint of Payson/Sasha in there as well.

2. Olympic Tears and broken dreams – _It was all for nothing. All hard work was for nothing when their names weren't called amongst the ones chosen for the Olympics. In the wake of being left behind, trying to survive a broken dream, Payson and Kelly becomes friends. When Austin brings them a new coach, will they try again? Do they have an other four years in them?_ Might be a Payson/Kelly fic. I've never written femslash before, so might try it... Sasha as the new coach, of course. I'll make Sasha a few years younger, and they'll eventually have a lot of fun together, to survive the next four years.

So what do you think? I'll probably write both, but which one should I start with? Or any other ideas?


	20. Chapter 20

I'm sorry I'm late posting this. Time wasn't on my side. I'm posting this from my iPad (started my vacation yesterday) so I hope the editing and formatting are okay. Anyway, here it is, the last chapter:

.:.

The JFK airport was busy as ever. Payson watched and listened to her best friends argue over everything from where they should sit on the train to what they should eat and if they should bring still or sparking water on the flight. Payson had never seen them like that before. With other words, they were nervous and stressed over the flight.

"Guys," she said, interrupting an argument over whether or not Kelly really should eat licorice. She looked at her friends. "I don't want you to feel stressed over this," she said. "Both Becca and I understand if you can't come. We don't want you to jeopardize your health."

"I'm not, I promise Pay," Kelly said. "Austin is just annoyingly overprotective. He will calm down, right Austin?" she glared at her fiancé.

"I will," Austin promised. "I'm sorry. Let's all chill."

"Let's all head to the gate," Payson said. "We're boarding in ten minutes."

"What? Why are we just standing here?" Austin asked, taking both his and Kelly's carry on bags, starting to walk toward the gate.

"He'll calm down as soon as we're on the plane," Kelly said as they followed. "Don't worry about me. I'm fine."

.:.

Even if Austin calmed down, and Payson sat with Kelly while Austin sat in the other end of the first class area, the flight felt very long. Payson studied, gossiped with Kelly, watched a movie, slept and studied some more before they touched ground in Germany.

It was 8 am local time in Berlin, and the mens qualifying competition would start in a couple of hours. They had missed the women's qualification which had taken place the day before. Payson had gotten a text from her sister saying that the team had qualified first, just one tenth of a point ahead of the Chinese team. And Becca had qualified in both the all around and in all event finals.

"Let's just take a cab, I'm too tired to figure out the buses," Kelly said.

Payson agreed. "We'll check in, have breakfast and then head to the arena."

They found their way to a cab and made their way into the city. The hotel where the American gymnasts stayed at had been out of rooms, so Payson had booked a room at a hotel across the street. Kelly and Austin had booked a room there as well. It was a smaller hotel, but as they stepped out of the cab they saw that it looked really nice. Comfy and homey.

"Breakfast?" Payson asked as they stepped into the elevator.

"I think I need to lie down for a moment, but you have breakfast and we'll meet before ten," Kelly said. They stepped out of the elevator on the third floor.

"Sure," Payson said. "I'll take a quick shower and change into something not smelling airplane and then I'm heading down. See you in an hour if not before."

They walked opposite directions on the third floor. Payson's hotel room had a view of the back of the hotel while Kelly and Austin headed toward the front. The room Payson had booked was small, but clean and the bed looked very inviting. But if she lay down, she knew she wouldn't get up again. So instead she placed her bag on the bed, found her toiletries and headed into the bright bathroom. Taking a hot shower after a long flight was one of the best feelings in the world.

A couple of hours later Payson, Kelly and Austin made their way across the street to the gymnasts hotel. In the lobby they spotted the American gang right away.

"Kelly! Austin!" Becca ran past Payson to hug Kelly and Austin.

"Hi to you too, dear sister," Payson said and pouted.

"Sorry, hi," Becca said and hugged her sister. "I was just so surprised! What are you doing here?" she asked, once again turned away from her sister. Payson turned to look for her boyfriend. She spotted him across the lobby, talking with the National Team head coach, Matthew. Matthew wasn't a club coach as the assistant coaches, he was one of two head coaches at TC and spent his time going between the national team gymnast's gyms. So Payson had met him a couple of times, he was an okay coach.

She waved to Sasha, not knowing what else to do. Where they public now? After all the articles and pictures? She didn't know how to act around him in public any more.

"Payson, are you listening?" Becca asked.

Payson turned back to her friends and sister. "Sorry, are you talking with me now?"

"Stop being so needy," Becca said with a smile. "I said that I'll be the last one in my group tomorrow, that's good, isn't it?"

They disappeared into a tactical discussion where the three former gymnasts all had different opinions on everything. When the discussion reached the topic of whether or not one should drink water before or after a routine Sasha thankfully interrupted them.

"How was the flight?" he asked, hugging them.

"Long," Austin said.

"Terrible," Kelly said.

"Okay," Payson said.

"I see you didn't have to suffer through it alone after all," Sasha said. "Are you really allowed to fly?" he asked Kelly.

"Yes," Kelly said. "I wouldn't jeopardize the health of my baby if it wasn't okay. I do love Becca, but no, I wouldn't hurt my baby to come to a gymnastics competition!"

"Sorry," Sasha said, hands up as if surrendering. "Of course you wouldn't."

"Are you mocking me?" Kelly asked.

"No, no," Sasha said, looking between the others for help.

"Hormones," Austin mouthed from behind his girlfriends back, but he didn't step in.

Payson couldn't help smiling, she was so happy her friends were all gathered.

.:.

Payson spent the day of the women's team finals in the bleachers. For being a junior competition, there were a lot of people there to watch. She sat with Austin and Kelly. They had gotten rather good seats. Apparently they were VIP guests.

"I could kill for some chocolate," Kelly suddenly said as the gymnasts started to rotate apparatuses. Becca's vault had been amazing and Payson was still feeling slightly high after watching it.

"My cue to get her some chocolate," Austin whispered to Payson. "Do you want something?"

"Wouldn't say no to a coffee," she smiled.

"I don't think I've ever seen you say no to a coffee," Austin said with a smile.

"I miss coffee," Kelly said dreamily.

They watched Becca prepare for uneven bars. Payson had never seen her sister so focused. Becca stood in line, earbuds in ears, waiting for her turn to warm up. The look in her eyes was lethal.

"Were competitions always this slow?" Austin asked as he sat down next to Payson again. He handed her the coffee and Kelly the chocolate.

"I don't think so," Kelly said. "We can never have had this long time between rotations. We would have fallen asleep."

"Actually I don't think they have change anything since we competed," Payson said. She was getting rather used to sit on the sideline by now.

"They must have!" Kelly and Austin continued to discuss if something had changed since they stopped competing over five years ago. Payson on the other hand focused on her sister and boyfriend again. Sasha was helping one of the girls with the warm up on the bars, while Becca was warming up next to the bars, still waiting for her turn. As usual when she watched her sister in action, she kind of missed gymnastics.

"Do you miss it?" she asked her friends, interrupting an argument in the making. "Gymnastics, do you miss it?" she repeated when they stared at her.

"We're at a competition, how could I miss it?" Kelly asked.

"I coach almost every day," Austin said. "And I can probably count on one hand the days you haven't been in the gym this year."

"I meant practicing yourself, being out there on the floor competing. Do you miss it?"

"Not really," Kelly said.

"Definitively not," Austin said. "Do you?"

"Sometimes," Payson said.

"Do you not remember the pain?" Kelly asked. "The hours and hours of pain?"

Payson shrugged. She was still in pain. Her back hurt pretty much every day. She had gotten used to it by now. "I don't miss the training. But do you remember the feeling of when everything went perfect? When you were so sure you would perform your routine perfect? The feeling of flying? Knowing that you were the best in the world at something? Don't you miss that?"

"I miss loving gymnastics," Kelly said. "I can remember when I still counted the hours until the next training."

"I loved gymnastics in the end," Austin said.

"Did you love it when the selection committee cut you?" Kelly asked.

He seemed to think it over for a minute before answering. "I loved gymnastics, even if it didn't love me back. Didn't you? Was it a job for you?"

"Not for me," Payson said. Remembering her time at TC and then the following weeks in Boulder and lastly the weeks leading up to the Olympics spent in Europe. "I think I still loved it... When Sasha took me and Becca training during Christmas, I loved it."

"When I've had the baby, we should train together again," Kelly said. "Imagine just practicing tricks for the fun of it. No musts or DOD's or deductions. Just fun. It was such a long time ago."

"Deal," Payson said with a smile.

"They're starting!"

.:.

After Team USA's girl's silver, and the boy's bronze, everyone was gathered in the restaurant for a celebration dinner. Everyone's mood was over the top and Payson couldn't keep her hands away from Sasha who sat next to her.

"Can you come over tonight?" she asked. The deal between the coaches was that they had every second day of bed check. Sasha had been on for last night and not been able to come over, so Payson had spent the evening working on her report that she had to hand in the following Monday.

"You can bet on it," he smiled.

"Can't wait," she returned his smile.

"I have a surprise for you."

She nodded, but before she could ask any questions, they were distracted by the conversations around the table.

Becca and Kelly was discussing baby names the entire evening. Payson tried to ask her sister how she was feeling or if she was nervous for the waiting all around finals, but all she wanted to concentrate on was the baby names.

"I still think Becca is a really good name," Becca said. They had reached desert and hadn't gotten any closer to a real suggestion for a baby name. Austin wanted the baby to be called Austin jr. it didn't matter if it was a boy or girl. Becca was set on Becca being an amazing name. Payson's sister also seemed to like really weird names which no one was actually sure were names. Kelly had been really diplomatic during the whole conversation, at least listening to all crazy suggestions before dismissing them.

"I'm thinking Alicia, if it's a girl, and maybe Kevin if it's a boy," Kelly said, interrupting the derailing discussion. "It's only suggestions," she added when they all turned to look at her.

"I like them," Austin said.

"Me too," both Keeler sister's agree.

It was still difficult to understand that her best friends were going to be parents in a month's time. That a little baby was actually inside that bump on Kelly's stomach.

.:.

After dinner, after saying good night to her sister, Payson hurried over to her hotel room. She just had time to straighten up the room. She had no idea how she, after just two nights, had managed to make a mess. Sasha knocked on the door before coming inside.

"Get you jacket," Sasha said. He was holding two take away mugs. "We're going out on the balcony."

Payson took her jacket, beanie and mittens and then followed Sasha through the hotel. She had no idea how he had found the balcony. It was a beautiful night. A full moon lit up the air, stars were visible through the light clouds and the balcony was facing the back garden. They sat down in a sofa, facing the garden. Sasha had a blanket that he spread over their legs. He handed her one of the mugs and she took a small sip. It was hot tea.

"How did you find this place?" Payson asked, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"I wanted somewhere we could be alone," Sasha said. "I've missed you." He kissed the top of her head.

Payson leaned back to look up at her boyfriend. "I missed you too," she said and kissed him.

She had never thought it was possible to miss somebody after just a few days. And missing someone that was right there? It was all so new to her. When she saw Sasha on the floor of the gym, she wanted to be able to smile at him, and when she saw him across the lobby at the hotel, she wanted to be able to at least walk up there and hug him. But they had decided to keep, maybe not hiding it, but not show their relationship off in the open. And after team USA's achievements, reporters were now everywhere. It was just unnecessary to draw attention to themselves.

Payson sipped her tea. It was a tradition that Sasha had thought her. Enjoying tea before bedtime.

"I have something for you," Sasha said, moving to take out something from his pocket.

"You're not going to propose, are you?" the words jumped out of Payson's mouth before she could stop them.

Sasha smiled but shook his head. "Would that be bad?"

"Maybe not," she smiled. "But early."

"We don't need to rush, we've got our whole life together," Sasha said and kissed her again. "But I got you a present."

"Why?" she asked as she accepted the small wrapped box.

"Because you're amazing, and you're doing amazingly in school and with your sister."

She smiled, almost feeling embarrassed by his words. She unwrapped a small jewelry box. She looked up at Sasha before opening it. He was smiling, watching her. She opened the lid and couldn't help smiling as she saw the content of the box. She took the small gold chain out, from it a small heart dangled.

"It's beautiful," Payson whispered. She handed it to her boyfriend and turned so he cold help her put it on. As it was secured around her neck she turned again. "How does it look?" she asked.

"You always look beautiful," he said.

She leaned in and kissed her wonderful boyfriend. "Thank you for being such an amazing person and boyfriend," she whispered. She kissed him again, planning to show him just how grateful she was. She moved so she sat across his lap. "Do you think anyone will be coming out here?" she asked between kisses.

"They did say that people doesn't use the balcony this time of the year," he whispered and she felt his hands over her back.

Suddenly Payson felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. She groaned, but took it out. It was Becca calling.

"I need to..."

Sasha nodded and Payson slid of off her boyfriend and sat down next to him. "Hey Becca, what are you doing up?" she answered the phone.

"Do you wanna watch a movie?" Becca asked, voice high, talking fast.

"Sschy Becca, don't you have a room mate?"

"I'm out in the hallway," Becca answered. "So, a movie? Or a a game of card?"

Becca was nervous, very nervous, so much Payson understood. "Sure, why don't you come over to my room?" she said, not knowing what else to do.

"Okay," Becca said. "I'll be there in five."

They ended the call and Payson turned to her boyfriend. "She's freaking out," she said, not knowing how to else describe it. "I told her to come over," Payson continued. "I hope that's okay."

Sasha nodded. "Just have her back before breakfast."

"I will," she said. The individual all around waited the following day. "I'm sorry we got interrupted," she said as they rose.

"Like I said, we've got forever, don't worry about it."

They kissed one last time before walking down to the empty lobby. Payson spotted her sister outside the hotel. She was actually running up and down the street.

"She has lost it," Payson said, shaking her head.

"Can I do anything?" Sasha asked.

"I'll handle it," Payson said. "But thanks."

"Call me if you need me."

Becca seemed to have spotted them and she came inside. She turned to Sasha first. "I'm sorry.. I..." she fell silent. It seemed like she didn't know how to explain her being not only out of bed, but out of the hotel, to her coach.

Sasha placed a hand over his eyes. "See you tomorrow Pay," he said, walking out of the hotel.

"I thought he would be mad," Becca whispered as they walked inside. "Did I interrupt something?"

It seemed like Becca had been drinking coffee all evening, she was so stressed it just radiated off her and made Payson's heart beat faster.

"Nothing is more important than you," Payson said and took her jacket off as her sister sat down on the bed. Becca bounced a few times before looking up again.

"So, what do you wanna do?"

Payson pulled out her iPad and sat down next to Becca. "How about watching Stick It?" she asked. It had been Payson's go to movie when she was in London. She had watched it to calm down, to get fired up, to focus, to go to sleep. It helped all problems. She'd had it on her iPad forever but hadn't seen it since... She couldn't even remember last time she saw it.

"Sure," Becca said with a big smile.

They crawl under the covers and started the movie. When Becca started to breath deeper she made sure the alarm on her phone was set for the following morning and turned the light off. It didn't take many minutes before her sister was snoring softly next to her.

.:.

The following day Becca competed in her first individual final on international level. And how she did it. Payson, Kelly and Austin all sat on the edges of their seats every time Becca competed. It was a nerve-wracking day, to say the least. When the last rotation started, with Becca on floor, the three friends were close to passing out.

"I can't watch," Austin said, bumping his legs up and down.

"This can't be good for the blood pressure," Kelly said.

"Calm down, she knows what she's doing," Payson said. But she was everything but calm. Twisting her hands so hard that it hurt she tried to keep her eyes on her sister who was now preparing for her turn. Payson could see that Sasha was staying close to Becca, but he didn't disturb her focus. She remember that tactic, it had been very successful five and a half year ago.

"Oh my god, oh my god," Austin mumbled. "I can't look."

Becca walked up on the podium. She looked around until she found Payson in the crowd. They locked eyes for a moment and and Payson smiled. She knew that look. With a nod they broke eye contact and Becca stepped inside the marked square, saluting the judges.

All nervousness disappeared the moment the music began. It was clear Becca knew what she was doing. Payson didn't need to worry for her sister when it came to gymnastics. She had it down to perfection by now.

The performance came to an end and a fraction of seconds silence, was replaced by thousands of people cheering.

Payson, Austin and Kelly were on their feet. Hugging each other, cheering.

"She won," Austin said. "She must have won."

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a new All Around junior world champion: Miss Becca Keeler from United States of America!" a voice boomed through the arena, causing people to cheer again.

Payson lost count on all people clapping her back and congratulating her, as if she had just done all the hard work. All Payson wanted to do, was to find her sister. But she had to wait through the medal ceremony first.

She watched her tiny little sister, who a year ago hadn't even decided if she really wanted to do gymnastics on the highest level, receive the gold medal. When the national anthem was being played, Payson couldn't keep tears from falling down her cheeks.

As soon as the ceremony was over, the trio ran down from the bleachers, found Sasha who let them past security and showed them to the changing room where Becca was waiting for her press conference.

"Becca!" Payson pulled her sister into a hug. "You did amazing," she whispered. "Congratulations!"

"Thank you," Becca said into the hug. "I just knew I could do it, even before the last rotation."

"Me too," Payson said, letting go so she could see her sister. "When I saw your eyes, I knew you would do a perfect routine."

"Becca, they want you at the press conference," Matthew, the head coach, said. Interrupting the Keeler sister moment.

Becca quickly hugged Austin and Kelly before following her coach out of the room.

"Can we see it?" Payson asked Sasha.

After a little persuasion, Sasha showed them to the room where Becca was now sitting with the rest of the medalists behind a table, in front of media from all over the world.

"Miss Keeler, tell us about your competition today. Did you know you could win?" a man in the front row asked.

"I knew that if I did well, I could medal. But anything can happen in gymnastics, so I just went out there to do my best," Becca answered with a smile.

"How much did it mean that your club coach Sasha Belof is here with you?"

"It means a lot, of course. I wish everyone could have their club coach here, it gives a feeling of security."

Payson didn't know where Becca had learned to speak like that. She effortlessly answered the questions, looked at the other medalists with curiosity when they answered a question, and over all just looked like she fitted in.

"Do you think you can beat your sister and win more Olympic medals than she did?"

Becca laughed with the reporters. "I'm far from any Olympic game right now. I can only wish and hope to be as successful as Payson was. I really look up to her and I am grateful for everything she's done for me. Even today she's missing school to be here."

The reporters turned and took some pictures of Payson. She tried to keep the lump in her throat at bay.

"Did you ever consider quitting gymnastics after you lost your parents in the car accident?"

Payson's blood turned cold. How could a reporter ask a 15 year old girl about the loss of her parents at a press conference? She wanted to step in, and she looked at Matthew, trying to will him into stopping the question.

Becca's smile had disappeared. "Loosing our parents have been though, and I apologize, but I do not want to talk about my personal life."

Payson couldn't do anything else than stare at her sister. When did she become so mature? So graceful?

"We thank today's medalist," the man who had introduced them said. Becca and the two other girls rose and left the room. Payson was quick to follow.

They made their way into the changing room again. Becca was talking with Matthew, so Payson and her friends kept in the background.

"She's better at all this than you ever were," Kelly said to Payson.

"I know," Payson said. "I don't know where she learned it."

They didn't need to wait too long. After a couple of minutes Becca came over to them.

"Apparently were sneaking out of the back," she said, looking excited as she put her jacket on.

.:.

The celebration had to wait. The following two days Becca would have event finals on all apparatuses. The nervousness Becca had shown the previous night was gone. Becca hadn't been the best girl on all apparatuses during the all around, but Payson had a sneaking suspicious her sister would at least medal on them all. Becca didn't seem to know what failure or mistakes were.

"She's good," Austin said as they sat in the cafe part of the hotel restaurant. The gymnasts were still gathered in the restaurant, talking loudly and laughing. "She'll be better than any of us," he added. "I don't think we need to worry about that."

"I've never been worried about her gymnastics," Payson said. She was holding a cup of tea between her hands. "I'm more worried about her hurting herself, or failing school, or getting her heart broken." Payson watched her sister across the restaurant. Becca looked happy as she laughed with her friends. Payson smiled as she saw how close Becca and Jason sat, they were so synchronized, if one moved, the other moved. She was glad she hadn't managed to ruin their relationship by being obnoxious.

"She'll do fine Pay, she's a Keeler, you always do great," Kelly said.

"I hope you're right," Payson mumbles. But the smile on her lips grew as she spots Sasha coming over. "Hi," she says.

"Matthew takes bed-check. Do you wanna head out?" with out he meant to her hotel room.

Payson nods and said good night to her friends before heading over to her younger sister. Becca moved away from her group of friends and came over to meet Payson.

"Are you heading out to have sex with your boyfriend?" Becca asked with a smile.

Payson ignored her sister. "Are you feeling okay?" Payson asked.

"I feel better than okay, Payson," Becca looked relaxed and honest.

"I'm very proud over you," Payson pulled her sister into a hug. "Your hard work, the gold," she tightened the embrace for a moment before letting go.

"Do you think mom and dad would have been proud?" Becca asked in a whisper.

Payson looked her sister in the eyes. "I know they would be proud, don't ever doubt that." They hugged again. "Do you want to watch a movie?"

Becca shook her head and smiled. "I'm fine," she said. "Go hang out with your boyfriend."

.:.

Following her sister's advice and they walked over to Payson's hotel and locked themselves in her room.

"No hyper active sister to take care of?" Sasha asked as he took his jacket off.

"Not yet anyway," Payson said, laying down on her bed. She was so exhausted. "She was so nervous last night, poor thing," she moved to the side to make room for Sasha next to her.

He flipped down on the bed with a deep sigh. "What'd you do last night?"

They both turned on the side so they could watch each other without even having to lift their heads. "Watched a movie," she said. "She fell asleep well before we were even half way through it."

"You're so good with her," Sasha said, gently stroking her cheek. "She's lucky to have you."

She couldn't agree with him. Becca was anything but lucky, with everything she'd had to go through with loosing their parents.

"Hey," Sasha said, lifting her jaw slightly so she was once again looking at him. "You can't change the past and you can't do anything to get your parents back. But what you are doing, giving Becca a good life, that matters."

Payson nodded, she knew that.

"But I can never give her the teenage years that I got," she said. Her parents had been the best parents ever. They supported her and her dream, but kept her grounded and made sure that she knew they loved her because of who she was and not because of what she could do. "I just miss them," she said. Feeling tears pressing behind her eyes.

"I know," he said. "You always will, but with time it'll get a little easier."

"Thank you for being so amazing," Payson said. "You saved us, both me and Becca."

He shook his head. "You saved me," he said with a smile.

"I can't describe in words how much I love you," Payson said.

"I love you more."

.:. One month later .:.

"What time is it?" Payson asked, pacing the waiting room.

"One minute more than last time you asked," Sasha said.

"What was it last time I asked?"

"Eleven thirty," Sasha said.

It wasn't possible. How could time move so slowly? "So an other fifteen minutes? I need more coffee..."

"I don't think your problem is that you need coffee," Sasha laughed.

Payson punched his shoulder, but there were no force in her movement. Sasha's phone started ringing, Payson came to a stop as she watched her boyfriend take the call.

"Hi Becca," he said.

She started pacing again.

"I don't think she's ignoring you, she's pacing, she probably didn't hear her phone. Do you want to talk with her?" Sasha was silent for a minute. "No baby yet, we promised we would call you when it happened and we will."

Payson looked out the window as her boyfriend ended the call with her sister. It was raining outside but it looked like it could be clearing up.

"Sit down Pay," Sasha suddenly said behind her, causing her to jump.

"What if something happens? I'm so worried," she said.

"Nothing will happen," Sasha said. "That's why they do a caesarian, so that nothing will happen. They're good doctors Pay. It'll be fine."

She nodded. It would be fine. She took a deep breath, trying to calm down her speeding heart."

"Miss Keeler? Mr. Belof?"

They both spun around and found a woman in her mid thirties looking at them.

"Yes," Payson said, stepping out of Sasha's embrace and walk across the waiting room.

"There's a small family in room 24 asking for you," she smiled.

Payson's heart skipped a beat as she heart the words small family. She was frozen to the ground until Sasha took her hand. Together they walked through the corridor and down to room 24. They knocked lightly before opening the door and stepping inside.

In the small but light hospital room they found their best friends, now parents. In Kelly's arm lay a very small tiny human being.

Payson felt her eyes water as she walked closer to the bed. Austin sat on the other side of the bed. His eyes never left the small baby.

"Come meet our daughter," Kelly smiled.

"It's a girl?" Payson asked, taking a few careful steps closer. She stopped a few feet from the bed. The baby girl was tiny with dark hair and a peaceful look on her face as she slept.

"She's the cutest thing ever," Payson breathed. She sat down on the chair next to the bed.

"She's perfect," Austin said.

"Do you have a name yet?" Sasha asked.

Kelly shook her head. "She just... I don't know. We'll figure it out," Kelly smiled.

"How do you feel?" Payson asked her best friend. "Can I do anything?"

"Actually," Kelly said. She and Austin shared a glance. "There's something we would like to ask you, both of you."

Payson looked up from the cute baby and looked at her friends.

"We would love if you wanted to be our daughter's godparents."

Payson couldn't believe what she was hearing. "What? Are you sure?" she asked.

"Of course we are, we wouldn't ask otherwise."

They didn't need to think about it. Payson couldn't keep her tears away when she hugged her friends and then gently stroke the baby girls soft hair.

Half a year ago, when her parents died in the accident, she never thought she would be happy again. She would never have guessed that six months later, she would be with the man she loved, be closer to her sister than they had ever been and made her own slightly dysfunctional family with her friends. She would never have guessed she could ever be this happy.

.:.

I can't believe I'm done. I'm so grateful to all of you. Your comments, follows and alert adds have kept me writing. I've got an epilogue that I'll post when I get back from my vacation. It takes place a few years into the future.

I've read all your comment on the fic suggestions I posed. I'll start writing the one where Payson and her friends work towards the 2016 Olympics after missing out on going to London. I saw that most of you would prefer a Payson/Sasha fic. I can't promise anything on the pairings now, I'll write what comes naturally.

Once again, thank you all so much for your support.


	21. Chapter 21

Long time no update, I know. And I'm sorry. Real life hasn't agreed with me and I've had some.. let's call it health issues. I hope the chapter doesn't feel too rushed.

But here it is, as promised, the epilogue. The last update of Payson the Guardian.

.:.

Payson turned off the light and locked the front door to her practice. For once she could leave early, one of her patients had canceled. Not only did the swimmer have a bad shoulder, she also had the flu.

She walked the short walk between her practice and the City Gym. Sasha would still be there, coaching the elite groups. A smile spread on her face. It was spring outside, a season Payson loved. Not too warm, not too cold. Perfect jeans and t-shirt weather.

Heading inside the gym she took her sunglasses off. From the door of the gym she could see her wonderful husband on the floor. By the looks of it he was scolding a group of young girls. When he was done, and the girls walked away with hanging heads, he spotted her. The smile on his lips still made her heart flutter.

"Hi," she said when he came closer.

He walked right up and kissed her. "Hi Dr. Keeler Belof," he said.

"My friends just call me Payson," she joked.

He laughed. "There's some messages for you in the office."

"Thanks," she said. "I'll get right to that before Rose Green comes in. Apparently her x-ray didn't look good."

"Damn," Sasha sighed. "More rest it is."

"Rest? I have her working hard, thank you very much."

"Sorry," he said, raised hands as if prepared to defend himself.

"Go back to work silly husband," she smiled and gently slapped him on the shoulder.

Payson walked over to the office she shared with her husband. On her desk a couple of new post-it notes were stuck on her computer screen. It was the only way she would see them, if they were stuck to the screen, the rest of her desk was a sea of notes, books and papers. Always having been a very neat person, it wasn't like Payson to have a mess of a desk. She blamed it on Sasha, his desk was even worse.

"Pay! Please tell daddy that he's stupid!"

Payson looked up with a smile. "Hi Allie," she got down on the young girls level and hugged her goddaughter. "What's Austin doing now?" she asked the five year old dressed in a bright pink leotard.

"He's not letting me do my new trick on the beam!"

Payson couldn't help smiling at the tiny girl. She loved gymnastics far too much for her own good. "Allie, if your dad says you're not ready, you probably should listen to him."

"But I'm really good," Allie pouted. "Please?"

Payson could never say no to the girl. Her hazel eyes, brown hair and always so emotional face was impossible to refuse.

"Is she trying to manipulate you again?" Austin suddenly asked from the door.

"No," Payson said, standing and turning around to face her best friend.

"She so was," Austin said, looking between his daughter and Payson. "You need to learn to say no, Pay."

Payson turned Allie around and shrunk down to the same level as her goddaughter again. "But look at this face!" she said, pointing especially on the dimples. "How could I say no to it?"

Austin just shook his head. "Allie go back to your group now or Becca will be mad at you."

Allie stomped out of the office, still pouting.

"She'll be the death of me," Austin said, leaning against the doorway as he spoke. "Imagine her starting to do more difficult tumbling passes or vaults," he shook his head. "I'll have my first heart attack before 35."

Payson smiled. "Our parents went through the same thing," she said. "I think you'll survive."

"You're right," he said with a sigh. "I don't know how they did it though... I'm terrified every time she just hangs from the bars or walk over the beam."

"You'll get used to it," Payson said, patting her friends shoulder before looking out the office door and spotting the group of kids over on the floor. "How's it going for Becca?"

Becca was teaching some of the younger groups a few night a week. She had no intention of becoming an elite coach, but she was very good with the kids.

"Good, she said she didn't need any help."

"Good," Payson said and walked back inside to sit down at her desk. "How's Kelly? I meant to call last night, but time kind of just disappeared."

"She's okay," Austin said, nodding. "Tired and nauseous."

"We'll come by for dinner tomorrow, tell her I bring desert."

Austin nodded and waved before heading out to the gym, back to the group of boys that had scattered around the gym.

Payson looked out over the gym again. She saw Allie run over to her group of young children doing "tumbling" on floor. Allie was a natural, and she was fearless, a combination that would either get her far, or get her injured. Payson couldn't think about it too much. She loved her goddaughter, but it would have been so much easier, and calmer, if Allie hadn't liked gymnastics.

She woke up from the daydreaming when Allie waved for her to look. Payson nodded to indicate she had understood. Allie then took off running and performed a tumbling pass most eight year olds wouldn't be able to master. When Allie turned around Payson clapped her hands and smiles. The younger girl smiled and then pointed at the beam. Payson shook her head. Allie pouted and Payson couldn't help laughing.

.:.

Payson spent half an hour consoling a crying gymnast and treating his twisted ankle after the boy blew a landing on the vault. With two years until the next Olympics everyone pushed themselves harder and harder to make the team going to worlds in the end of the summer. It was difficult to watch, even more so than when it had been Becca. Becca was never injured, not more than a twisted ankle after a vault, and some soreness in her knee. As the boy walked out of the gym, leaning on a friend for support, with a hanging head Payson felt almost as sad herself. She wished she could help them all.

"Pay! Pay! Look at me!" Allie called from the floor. Payson nodded and the girl took off once again, running before flipping and twisting over the floor. It was a combination she had mastered at seven or eight, herself. She clapped her hands and Allie came running over.

"Can't I try it on the beam? Pllllleassss?" Allie's puppy eyed look was impossible to deny.

Payson looked around the gym. Austin was working with a group of boys on the rings in the other part of the large gym. She looked back over at Allie, who now looked like she was about to burst with excitement. Payson cursed herself as she nodded.

"Fine, one time Allie," she said and came down from the office and followed Allie who had already sprinted over to the beam. The young girl was so short that she had to work really hard to climb up on the high beam.

"Start with a simple cartwheel Allie," she said, stopping the girl just before she was about to throw herself into a combination.

Payson wasn't sure how Allie was so good. It must simply be in her blood. Without any hesitation, the girl just did a cartwheel and landed as if her feet were glued to the beam under her.

"Okay, try it," Payson said as Allie looked impatiently at her.

Holding her breath she watched Allie throw herself into the same combination as she had done on the floor. Payson felt her body tense, prepared to try to catch the girl if she would fall. But of course she didn't, Allie never fell. She landed perfectly with straight back and raised arms.

Payson clapped her hands as Allie smiled largely.

"Allie and Payson!"

Austin's bark made Payson jump. She turned an looked at Austin and Sasha, both glaring at them.

"Payson said I could do it," Allie said, jumping down from the beam and moving to stand beside Payson.

"She did the puppy eyes!" Payson said. Looking at her oh so handsome husband, giving her his serious face, it felt like she was transferred ten years back in time. Her stomach fluttered and she had to work hard to keep a smile from showing on her lips.

"Allie, go back to your group before Becca notices that you're gone!" Austin said. Looking sternly at his daughter.

"Sorry," Allie whispered to Payson and ran over to Becca and the young children now practicing on a small version of a vault.

"You're impossible," Austin said to Payson as he shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest.

"She begged me, you know I can't say no to her! I tried!" Payson defended herself. Sasha looked very amused about the whole situation. He was smiling as he watched her getting scolded by her friend.

"You're both impossible!" Austin said, also noticing Sasha's smile. Austin stomped away, leaving Payson and Sasha bursting with laughter.

Payson let Austin calm down for ten minutes before heading over to the second office which he shared with the other assistant coaches. It was only Austin in the room, he was doing something on the computer as she knocked on the door.

"Sorry about falling for her charm," Payson offered with a small smile. "And I'm very sorry about me and Sasha behaving inappropriate and laughing at you."

Austin sighed. "I'm not angry."

Payson knew that, he was never really mad at her. "I knew she would be able to do it, she was so secure on the floor. I would never do anything to jeopardize her health."

"I know that Payson, chill."

He motioned for her to sit down and she took the invite. Her feet were always hurting these days.

"She's good," Payson said.

"She is," Austin nodded. "Why couldn't she had been the clumsiest kid ever? Or hated all sports?"

Payson smiled. "You don't mean that," she said, even if she had thought the same thing herself only hours earlier. "And you don't worry, she'll change interests so many times before growing up."

"You're right," Austin nodded. "I'm very glad you're always on Allie's side, thanks."

"Don't worry about it," Payson smiled and got up. "I need to do some work..."

.:.

A couple of hours later Payson was done with her work in the gym. She had made a few calls, answered some emails and of course met with Rose who had a stress fracture in her foot. Payson hated to see injured athletes. They were always so sad, but she liked the feeling of helping them.

Getting up from behind the desk she walked over to the wall of windows dividing the office from the gym. The gym was full of gymnasts in different ages, all about to end a long day of training. It was always full speed a head at the city gym. Payson loved it, first working at her own practice and then coming here, to her second home. But it would probably be a little bit less of it in the future.

"I'm heading out," Becca suddenly said from the doorway, causing Payson to jump.

"See you tomorrow at Kelly's?" she asked.

Becca nodded. "Can Jay get a ride with you? I'll have to stay late at school so I thought I would head over there straight from the library."

"Sure," Payson said. "We'll leave from here at seven."

While Becca was now in college, Jason was still practicing gymnastics full time. He'd done one Olympics, and was now working toward a second. It looked good. He probably weren't going to do as well as Becca had, a couple of years ago, but he would hold his own. A result like the one Becca had accomplished probably wouldn't be seen for years and years, if ever.

"You look a little pale, everything okay?" Becca asked, coming further into the office.

"Everything is great," Payson said with a smile.

"Like great-great?" Becca asked, face very neutral.

"Like fantastic," Payson's smile grew.

Becca smiled broadly. "Good to hear," she said.

Payson hugged her sister good bye and waved to Jason who came out from the changing room. She was still very relieved that she hadn't managed to scare Jason off all those years ago. He and Becca might have had their ups and downs, like everyone, but it was hard to imagine life without him. After the Olympics two years ago, about the same time Payson and Sasha got married, they had moved in together in a very nice apartment just outside campus.

Payson shook her head, waking up from her sentimental daydreaming. She watched as the gymnast filed out one after one, waving to them as they waved to her before leaving. Allie came into the office to hug her before leaving with Austin. Lastly it was just Payson and her husband left. She walked out to him where he was moving some mats.

"Are you coming?" she asked. It was getting late and she was starving.

"Coming love," he said, throwing the last mat on the pile.

"I thought we would go out to eat," Payson said. "Maybe that Italian restaurant?"

"What are we celebrating?" Sasha asked, not really looking at her before he started putting away the weight bans.

"That I'm pregnant?" it was more a question than a statement. The sentence that was, she was sure of the facts.

He turned to face her. "What?" he asked, a smile playing on his lips.

She just smile.

"No, what did you say?" he ask, coming closer. It was clear that he had heard what she had said.

"I said I'm pregnant," she smiled, feeling tears pressing behind her eyes as she saw his smile. He pulled her into a tight embrace and she hid her face in the crook of his neck. For how long had she dreamed about telling him those news by now? Three years?

"Are you sure?" he asked.

"I took three tests," she mumbled against his skin.

"We're going to be parents?"

She nodded and felt a tear escape as she watched a tear roll down his cheek. "We're going to be parents," she said the words out loud for the first time, leaning back to look him in the eyes.

"I never thought I would feel happier than when I married you," he said, wiping the tears from her cheeks. "I was wrong. I love you so much. And I'll love our baby more than anything in this world."

"I'm counting on it," Payson said and kissed her husband. "I love you too, by the way."

.:.

Thank you, all of you, for your support. It's meant everything for me. I can't believe I actually finished this.

I know I talked about other fics before, and I've started writing, but I can't make any promises about when and if I'll upload them. It's just a bit up in the air for me now. I still write though, both miobi and other fandoms and original fiction. So maybe there'll be more from me, I just can't say when.

Again, thank you all. I love you for sticking with me :)


	22. Video Trailer on YouTube

I was bored and made a video trailer for Payson the Guardian. I just uploaded it on YouTube so I thought I should let you know if you're interested in watching it. I couldn't use my usual video editing program, but I think it turned out okay. It was actually hard finding clips of Payson and Becca together, and of Becca at all.

Please let me know what you think, either here or on YouTube.

Link: www . youtube watch?v=Xi00jQ6y6Is

I also uploaded some pictures for the "cast" of the fic. With pictures for Becca's boyfriend Jason, Richard the coach and Kelly and Austin's daughter.

Link: tearsxinxthexnight . tumblr post/51959286533/payson-the-guardian-characters

Love you all!

X


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